Subliminal Talk

Started X4A-1000 on January 3rd. Will do a 1 month trial, and decide from there.

My relationship ended recently, so it’s still a tough phase for me.
I work from home, haven’t gone out much these days, except for the gym and mall.
At the gym, I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary so far, except a few glances here and there.
At the mall, I’be gotten some stares from women that were with their boyfriend.
But haven’t been in a position to sit long enough near an attractive woman.
One detail to notice, I was chatting with a young woman on Instagram, she is the shy type, but what strikes me as odd was how she sent me vocal or video message and also mentioned how she is feeling unwell from menstrual pains. I’ve only known her for a day.

I met with my ex-GF last night, we were in my car for almost an hour, it got emotional. At the end, when I arrived back home, she texted me how she likes me so much and wishes we could spend at least one more (final) night together.
I didn't feel myself projecting or radiating an aura, so not sure how to recognize it. Unless I consciously focus on it. I also felt warmth radiating out of me last time at the gym, and horny.

Went to a doctor appointment today and there was also a nurse who is also a dietician. She was young, I definitely found her physically attractive. She was a few feet close to me and kept interacting with both me and the doctor. She acted very nice, but nothing that is not out of courtesy and professional etiquette. I was mindful of whether my aura is firing up, sniping her, and I think it did. I felt an energy radiating out of me, and especially from between my legs.
I estimate she spent a total of 8-10 minutes within a few feet of me. Noticed no obvious signs of attraction from her.

I was thinking about programs such as X4A, Aura of Love and how it is said about practicing Nofap that it creates an aura around you. And from my experience, when I was doing it for a few weeks, I definitely experienced a certain kind of aura, and also increase in manifestation, women that I haven't spoken to contacting me out of the blue.

Couple points. First, women are masters of hiding their sexual attraction, interest and arousal unless they're comfortable enough to show it and 8-10 minutes would have indicated that she's aroused by you, but not be enough time to get her crazy responsive.

Second, the sniping effect happens to the degree that you want to have sex with her. This apparently can be consciously or subconsciously, because I have seen multiple times when consciously I wasn't willing to be bothered, tired, etc. but they responded anyway, and I felt the energy response to them.

Devastated right now. My recent ex-girlfriend just admitted that she went back to her ex and they had sex. I feel humiliated, I feel less of a man. This is really painful and will require a lot of emotional healing and toughening up.
I blocked her, it's time for me to move on and rebuild my confidence and masculinity.

I'm sorry to hear that. But remember that your masculinity isn't based on what other people do.

EDIT: Typo!

Absolutely what Strider said. If you're feeling that way, it means you're using an external locus of control. In other words, instead of deciding hat you believe about yourself, you let others do so for you, which is a form of weakness that women can smell miles away, and this sort of thing is the result. Instead of letting her decide with her beliefs, choices and actions what your masculinity is or how valuable it is, decide for yourself. Choose your own reality, and then stop worrying about or caring what others think of you. Others will accept you as whatever you believe yourself to be, and if you ask them what that is (consciously or otherwise) then they will conclude that you're weak, and act accordingly. The results are that they don't respect you and don't treat you with respect. If you allow them to decide for you what to think of yourself, this will result in you concluding (wrongly) that somehow it means that you aren't good enough, aren't masculine enough, should be ashamed of yourself, etc. In fact what they're doing is pointing out that they don't respect you because you don't decide for yourself what you think of you, and give that power away to others.

Stop doing that. Be your own source of control, masculinity, power and decisions. Be your own man, decide for yourself what you believe about yourself, and then solidify that as your reality and ignore what others think, because in almost all cases, it doesn't matter what they think.

You figure this one point out and do this one thing, and I guarantee you, women will be MUCH more interested in and respectful of you from then on.

@StridingStrider Thank you, I appreciate it. Indeed, I would agree. But isn’t it the case that your woman’s bad behaviour will reflect your levels of masculinity?

@Shannon Roger that.

(01-15-2023, 03:30 PM)GreekGod22 Wrote: [ -> ]@StridingStrider Thank you, I appreciate it. Indeed, I would agree. But isn’t it the case that your woman’s bad behaviour will reflect your levels of masculinity?

My friend, I'm sorry to hear your story. It may not help much, my two cent is you may not be able to control someone's negative behavior, but you can control how long you gonna participate in it. Man up. Move on.

Hope things get better emotionally, spiritually, psychologycally and physically.

(01-15-2023, 03:30 PM)GreekGod22 Wrote: [ -> ]@StridingStrider Thank you, I appreciate it. Indeed, I would agree. But isn’t it the case that your woman’s bad behaviour will reflect your levels of masculinity?

I'm no expert, but not per se how your women behaves but how you react to it. It seems you did reasonable thing and blocked her in response to what she did. No one can blame you for that if she crossed one of your boundaries. You can't control her fully. Only set boundaries and enforce them. We all have free will and life would be boring if we were all just robots.

Psychologically, women use sex as a form of self-affirmation. I think it's quite common after break ups. At least she was honest with you. The truth hurts, but in the end it sets us free.

My social life these days hasn't been very active, so not really seeing the sub's influence. I go to the gym a few times per week, last weekend I went out in a club. But I don't really find myself in situations where the same women is physically near me for long-enough time.
I'm going to stop the trial/ subscription at the end of the month, and see what I run next.