Subliminal Talk

Need to keep a journal.. i think its my first..

Ive done 2 cycles, 3 day rest starts tonight..

Changes noticed:
- voice deeper each hour.. right now its deep as f***, first noticed sending a voice memo to someone on the weekend, he then replied "you sound good"
- my articulation and control of the english language has improved drastically.. this could have something to do with my run of MLS (yes i am english native but lost my gift a while ago and my english got worst)
- some other subtle, i think i can look people in the eyes better
- im very tried, but actually tired, not like previous subs where you are a zombie, the tiredness feels different it feels more normal, im not sure if i am just tried or OF v3.. cant wait to sleep
- i woke up at exactly the end of the loop last night - this has also happened on MLS 5.75

i execute extremely well in the first 30 days, then its all f***ery after that.. lets see what happens with OF v3.. really want to forget about it and just run the dam thing.. but something told me to do this journal..

peace.

nothing much to report, switched to 2 days on 2 days off as off 2 days ago. Now on 2 days break
not feeling much yet.

def can look people in the eyes better.
felt anger last couple of days.
voice def deeper.
harder to wake up in the mornings, could be any reason though.

just realised why ive been putting so much pressure on myself and my trading.
it was my fear of failing my family not myself. i thought my money would help them. (of course family doesnt want money they only want love.)

this makes sense because i knew i didnt have a deep fear of failing, or losing money or anything. dont get me wrong its not like i want to lose all my money. but it didnt make sense to just call it a fear of failing, there was something deeper.

now i strongly believe, my high expectations with trading are/were to fundamentally help my family financially. because everything else i can buy by getting a job - again not what i want but not the end of the world. but its the extreme wealth i want for my family and to provide for them for generations that i really want.

EDIT: i dont have kids yet (maybe now i know why), i mean mum dad and siblings..

new changes..
i am having a few "ah ha" moments, thats why i feel that way.. or thats why i did that..
voice is still deeper, especially in the mornings after listening
tired today, so i think i will stick to the 1 loop per day 2 days on 2 days off another week and assess if i should up it or not, im thinking not because i enjoy these ah ha moments
i am recognising fear, and saying to myself that is fear just do it and ignore it

side note: probably the first time im taking a sub day by day and not expecting anything.. not sure if thats a good thing OR if i am running away from it..

STARTED AGAIN AFTER STOPPING LAST YEAR IN SEP
First night
31 march
Amazon after first listen of 1 loop, no fear of R or J at work
Full confidence to take over a work and be the boss
Amazing especially during the night time
Feel like a king at work I feel now I can do anything
No fear at all, running several encounters in my head and how i would react. im not scared of anyone right now.