Stage 1, Day 21:
Doesn't even feel like I've been back on AM6 for 3 weeks already. I already feel like a greater sense of confidence and authority is taking hold in general. It's also nice to feel masculine without feeling angry at the same time. It's not that I equate masculinity to anger, but for a few months last year I was getting to the point where I was my most masculine when I was angry. Now I'm getting to the point where I am in tune with my masculine self almost 24/7. Feels like I'm being re-calibrated and growing more into the type of man I was meant to become.
My voice has sounded consistently deeper and more authoritative without me having to consciously control my tone. This has caused almost every single person I've spoken to to refer to me as "sir". I also notice that I'm speaking more assertively and concisely this past week.
Stage 1, Day 26:
Since the last Update:
- Had a patient over the phone tell me I have a rough voice, I could've been a John Wayne.
- Ex wife seems to want me to show affection in subtle ways. for a while feelings returned since we've both grown as human beings but they've been eroding again. Even women I had crushes on or were talking to before AM6, I no longer think about or make any effort to speak with.
- Even though there have not been no signs of potential confrontation with my management team, I've been running scenarios in my head unconsciously, waiting for the day they say or do something stupid so I can verbally tear them apart. Their incompetence is sickening. They're ok as human beings...sort of. As "leaders" though I have no respect for them, they make it tough to even want to show them compassion.
- A sales woman just came knocking at my door. Kind of surprised anyone is even doing door-to-door sales at a time like this. Anyway, she was kind of cute but I noticed that the whole time she spoke and tried smiling at me, I stayed stone-faced with no reaction. Once her pitch was done, I politely declined her offer and wished her well. Not that a woman's looks these days has much of an effect on how I treat her because I consider way more important factors, but truthfully that's probably the coldest and non-reactive I've ever been towards a pretty girl that I didn't know.
- I'm back to taking control of conversations. I even stay silent when I'm done expressing myself just to see if others will contribute to the conversation, and I'm comfortable with the silence. If they're silent for too long or If I actually have something to do though I'll excuse myself without hesitation.
Nice progress, man. You get more focused upon yourself and you value yourself and your time more. Thumbs up!
This seems like your AM programming is solid and resharpening, its only stage 1 and the whole concepts is already there. Nice progress, glad to read.
The thing about "imagining confronting with others " is happens to me too, it is a kind of tiring and depressing for me.
(06-04-2020, 08:45 AM)DavisMind91 Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 1, Day 26:
Since the last Update:
- Had a patient over the phone tell me I have a rough voice, I could've been a John Wayne.
- Ex wife seems to want me to show affection in subtle ways. for a while feelings returned since we've both grown as human beings but they've been eroding again. Even women I had crushes on or were talking to before AM6, I no longer think about or make any effort to speak with.
- Even though there have not been no signs of potential confrontation with my management team, I've been running scenarios in my head unconsciously, waiting for the day they say or do something stupid so I can verbally tear them apart. Their incompetence is sickening. They're ok as human beings...sort of. As "leaders" though I have no respect for them, they make it tough to even want to show them compassion.
- A sales woman just came knocking at my door. Kind of surprised anyone is even doing door-to-door sales at a time like this. Anyway, she was kind of cute but I noticed that the whole time she spoke and tried smiling at me, I stayed stone-faced with no reaction. Once her pitch was done, I politely declined her offer and wished her well. Not that a woman's looks these days has much of an effect on how I treat her because I consider way more important factors, but truthfully that's probably the coldest and non-reactive I've ever been towards a pretty girl that I didn't know.
- I'm back to taking control of conversations. I even stay silent when I'm done expressing myself just to see if others will contribute to the conversation, and I'm comfortable with the silence. If they're silent for too long or If I actually have something to do though I'll excuse myself without hesitation.
Maybe a better course of action is to give them nudges in how they can improve, even if you are open with your criticism. "verbally ripping someone apart" does seldom give you other than fear of mistakes and create enemies, while well formulated criticism done in a professional manner on a one to one basis probably will make someone respect you. Don't know what your position is, but that is a course of action that I think would benefit not only you but them more in the long run.
(06-04-2020, 11:17 AM)Zubrowka Wrote: [ -> ] (06-04-2020, 08:45 AM)DavisMind91 Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 1, Day 26:
Since the last Update:
- Had a patient over the phone tell me I have a rough voice, I could've been a John Wayne.
- Ex wife seems to want me to show affection in subtle ways. for a while feelings returned since we've both grown as human beings but they've been eroding again. Even women I had crushes on or were talking to before AM6, I no longer think about or make any effort to speak with.
- Even though there have not been no signs of potential confrontation with my management team, I've been running scenarios in my head unconsciously, waiting for the day they say or do something stupid so I can verbally tear them apart. Their incompetence is sickening. They're ok as human beings...sort of. As "leaders" though I have no respect for them, they make it tough to even want to show them compassion.
- A sales woman just came knocking at my door. Kind of surprised anyone is even doing door-to-door sales at a time like this. Anyway, she was kind of cute but I noticed that the whole time she spoke and tried smiling at me, I stayed stone-faced with no reaction. Once her pitch was done, I politely declined her offer and wished her well. Not that a woman's looks these days has much of an effect on how I treat her because I consider way more important factors, but truthfully that's probably the coldest and non-reactive I've ever been towards a pretty girl that I didn't know.
- I'm back to taking control of conversations. I even stay silent when I'm done expressing myself just to see if others will contribute to the conversation, and I'm comfortable with the silence. If they're silent for too long or If I actually have something to do though I'll excuse myself without hesitation.
Maybe a better course of action is to give them nudges in how they can improve, even if you are open with your criticism. "verbally ripping someone apart" does seldom give you other than fear of mistakes and create enemies, while well formulated criticism done in a professional manner on a one to one basis probably will make someone respect you. Don't know what your position is, but that is a course of action that I think would benefit not only you but them more in the long run.
Right which is what my usual course of action would be. I’m however dealing with a different breed of management. 3.5 years of working here has shown me the most effective way to deal with these individuals.
(06-05-2020, 12:07 AM)DavisMind91 Wrote: [ -> ] (06-04-2020, 11:17 AM)Zubrowka Wrote: [ -> ] (06-04-2020, 08:45 AM)DavisMind91 Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 1, Day 26:
Since the last Update:
- Had a patient over the phone tell me I have a rough voice, I could've been a John Wayne.
- Ex wife seems to want me to show affection in subtle ways. for a while feelings returned since we've both grown as human beings but they've been eroding again. Even women I had crushes on or were talking to before AM6, I no longer think about or make any effort to speak with.
- Even though there have not been no signs of potential confrontation with my management team, I've been running scenarios in my head unconsciously, waiting for the day they say or do something stupid so I can verbally tear them apart. Their incompetence is sickening. They're ok as human beings...sort of. As "leaders" though I have no respect for them, they make it tough to even want to show them compassion.
- A sales woman just came knocking at my door. Kind of surprised anyone is even doing door-to-door sales at a time like this. Anyway, she was kind of cute but I noticed that the whole time she spoke and tried smiling at me, I stayed stone-faced with no reaction. Once her pitch was done, I politely declined her offer and wished her well. Not that a woman's looks these days has much of an effect on how I treat her because I consider way more important factors, but truthfully that's probably the coldest and non-reactive I've ever been towards a pretty girl that I didn't know.
- I'm back to taking control of conversations. I even stay silent when I'm done expressing myself just to see if others will contribute to the conversation, and I'm comfortable with the silence. If they're silent for too long or If I actually have something to do though I'll excuse myself without hesitation.
Maybe a better course of action is to give them nudges in how they can improve, even if you are open with your criticism. "verbally ripping someone apart" does seldom give you other than fear of mistakes and create enemies, while well formulated criticism done in a professional manner on a one to one basis probably will make someone respect you. Don't know what your position is, but that is a course of action that I think would benefit not only you but them more in the long run.
Right which is what my usual course of action would be. I’m however dealing with a different breed of management. 3.5 years of working here has shown me the most effective way to deal with these individuals.
Alright, well have fun ripping them a new one when you get the chance then, lol.
Stage 1, day 29:
The other day I attempted to organize a trade with a member from another forum I’ve been apart of for a couple months. He turned down my offer. Him saying no isn’t what pissed me off, it was the weak, stupid and roundabout way he went of doing it that did. I swiftly called him out on his weak behavior and advised him that if he didn’t want to trade all he had to do was be a man and give me a direct no for an answer. That had me unusually pissed for a while so I decided to take a break from work and deeply meditated. Ever since that day I’ve been delving deeper into my spiritual practices, which I had all but stopped for a while. I’m not sure why but it feels sometimes as if I’m guided toward becoming a “spiritual alpha male”. Feels like my ego has been more balanced the last couple days.
Why spend your time trying to change other people's behavior if the only thing it accomplish is getting yourself upset?
(06-08-2020, 07:25 AM)Zubrowka Wrote: [ -> ]Why spend your time trying to change other people's behavior if the only thing it accomplish is getting yourself upset?
I didn't attempt to change anything, I made a suggestion. I asserted myself and made it known that I won't tolerate smartass remarks and indirectness.
Stage 1, Day 31:
This month has flown by. Feels like at this point, everything I'm going to get out of stage 1 has already been set subconsciously. Amazing thing is, I didn't even feel any boredom with this stage. Stage 1 seems much more eventful this time around as opposed to the first run. Unless something significant happens I won't be posting again until I've started stage 2.
Update:
Just gonna leave this here, it seems it's only stage 1 and it's already got me to the point where I take shit from no one. In the past I secretly might've even felt a little bad about having to put someone in their place but I simply do not. The way I'm beginning to refine my responses too are like a father calmly but firmly disciplining a child.
(06-09-2020, 06:26 AM)DavisMind91 Wrote: [ -> ] (06-08-2020, 07:25 AM)Zubrowka Wrote: [ -> ]Why spend your time trying to change other people's behavior if the only thing it accomplish is getting yourself upset?
I didn't attempt to change anything, I made a suggestion. I asserted myself and made it known that I won't tolerate smartass remarks and indirectness.
OK gotcha. Totally with you on that.
Stage 2, Day 1:
- 12 hours of listening had me wake up very tired, but I gained energy and motivation within 5 minutes of being on my feet. Completed my hygiene and grooming routine, and about 3 house chores all within one hour of waking up.
- As expected people's BS is irritating me but I'm keeping myself distant from it. It already feels like I'm less tolerable of stupidity and useless conversation.