I switched to DMSI 3.3-D from USLM3. Against the instructions, I only took 2 days break between. I was prepared for any turbulence, as it couldn't be any worse than some of the things I've gone through in the last couple years. I understand that this complicates the usefulness of the results for the next month or so. I don't think this was running away from USLM. I want the lastest FRM and I don't plan on purchasing another sub in the immediate future, so DMSI is my best option and I'm on it now for the long run until I get the results I want. I have a lot of fear. I think there are some big ones which are holding me back in every area of my life and healing whatever is holding me back from executing DMSI will have effects that ripple through my whole life.
I have completed 1 week so far. Hybrid at night with sleepphones.
5 days on, I was tired, but probably not much more so than on USLM or even normally without subs as my energy levels are almost always low and I'm always tired. Had some uncomfortable thoughts and emotions come up about the woman who recently broke up with me in a painful and complicated and messy fashion. I had many intense and vivid dreams. Some I remember , some faded soon after waking.
First day off, I completely unexpectedly saw a photo of someone I dated many years ago. I was in love and it was heartbreak that I really never healed from. For several years I purposely avoided any possibility of seeing her or even a photo of her, as I knew it would be painful. After seeing her, my insides were churning. That night, I was laying in bed and I focused on the sensations coming up while thinking about her. There was intense pressure in my solar plexus. Then my heart started opening up and it was very pleasurable for about 5 minutes, then subsided and I fell asleep.
Second day off, more painful thoughts and emotion about the old break up. Dreams about her that night. I woke up and had some thoughts that had to be written down, It turned into a short and hopeful poem. This is unusual. The only other time I've written poems or even had any real creative inspiration was during a past experience with energy healing that I could only describe as a sort of enlightenment type experience.
I'm now still feeling upset and emotional about the old breakup and getting waves of anger (which is new) about the recent break up and the way she treated me.
That's interesting, I found myself just looking at past conversation and pictures with girls I had been intimate with...
I think it has to do with the new tech it's helping you get rid of the "unwanted emotions" that was attached to these past events.
Are you going to watch dragonball super broly?
(12-16-2018, 11:44 PM)FluffyBunny Wrote: [ -> ]That's interesting, I found myself just looking at past conversation and pictures with girls I had been intimate with...
I think it has to do with the new tech it's helping you get rid of the "unwanted emotions" that was attached to these past events.
Yes I think so too. Dealing with old crap that's still holding me back.
Second night of second week. During the first loop, I felt energy moving up my spine. It felt really good. This is a pathway that is chronically blocked for me. I have in the past sometimes gotten this to flow properly and I feel really good, but it slows down every time and I go back to feeling down and low energy. Hopefully the FRM is chipping away at what is causing this blockage.
Still feeling the uncomfortable emotions about the past relationships. I'm getting a few painful spots pop up briefly in various parts of my body.
One of my resistance tactics is to eat unhealthy food. Normally, I can stick to a healthy diet, except when I'm really stressed. When I'm on subs, I eat a lot of junk food. I will work on cleaning up my diet. I also am not going to bed early enough and depriving myself of sleep for no good reason. I will start getting to bed earlier and getting enough rest.
(12-17-2018, 07:38 AM)rayrocanaldo Wrote: [ -> ]Are you going to watch dragonball super broly?
Haven't really watched since I was a kid. haha The name just came to me for some reason.
Starting 3rd break. First 2 weeks were Hybrid, 3rd was Masked. I used 5-6 out of 16 volume on ipad with sleepphones. This is the volume where I can still hear the lowest waves but it's not uncomfortably loud. I think I had more resistance on masked. I was eating a lot and not healthy choices this last week even more so than the weeks before. Part of that was the holidays, but it was a resistance tactic too. I will go back to hybrid next week.
I am still tired and have low motivation, but that is not unusual for me. I'm still spending a lot of thinking about old relationships and feeling terrible emotions about them.
Sometimes I feel like I could burst out crying but I don't. It's almost like some part of me is crying just barely under the surface of my conscious awareness. I experienced this on 3.2 as well.
I'm seeing 11:11 almost every day, sometimes multiple times per day. Anyone know what this might mean?
(12-29-2018, 02:55 AM)Just Saiyan Wrote: [ -> ]I'm seeing 11:11 almost every day, sometimes multiple times per day. Anyone know what this might mean?
I see those numbers, and a few other sets that include 3, 1, and 7 everyday, myself. Any theory I have would break forum rules, but you can research it - there's plenty of theory out there about it.
This is the end of week 4. Day 1 of week 4 I was up most of the night with extreme arousal and fantasizing and major painful sensations in my head. I eventually just had to "relieve the pressure" so I could sleep. That was the only time I've even really had much of an urge to do this while on 3.3.
The next night I felt a little bit better, like there was maybe a tiny bit better energy flow. The rest of the week I have slept poorly and felt pretty bad, tired, and low motivation to do much of anything.
Energy wise, even before subs, I have felt a pressure and buildup of energy in my body. It's like it's all held in and I don't release energy that needs to be released. Whatever is causing me to hold or not be able to release this energy and have a proper energy flow is the big thing holding me back. I have had moments of getting this flow going on before subs. There have been even fewer and briefer moments with subs where it feels almost like I'm on the verge of getting a breakthrough and moving this energy but it never quite gets there. I am hopeful that I will get this breakthrough soon.
After week 5.
I feel less frequent distress and painful emotions about past relationships like has happened almost constantly since I started 3.3. It's still happening, but much less this week. This may be attributed to my circumstances this week as I have been away from home and work and experiencing new things, so my mind is on better things.
I don't feel any external execution of the program goals. I have been around many attractive women the last week and I didn't notice any attention from them.
Yesterday, the day leading up to the start of first loop of week 6, I had a lot of pressure and tension in my head. I still feel that today.
Still feeling the pressure in my head the last couple of days. It may be a little less dense now like it is starting to turn into tingles instead of just pressure. If this continues, I will consider it a very promising sign of breaking through a long standing energy issue, but it's too early to make any conclusions about that.
I have just done 3 days of pretty close to my ideal healthy eating. I haven't had more than 1 day of healthy eating in the last couple of months. I gained about 20 lbs in the last couple months of pretty ravenously eating a lot of junk. It has been pretty easy the last 3 days to stick to a healthy diet.
Last night I dreamed about the woman from the long ago relationship and she was with another guy. I saw them briefly together and kept trying to get back there to see what was going on. I don't remember the whole dream. I also dreamed about another woman who is one of the most attractive I have ever met. She was supposed to show up somewhere and she wasn't there and I think I was looking for her. That's all I remember
On the last week of 3.3, I ate healthy. Then I took the break plus a few days waiting for 3.3.1 and went back to unhealthy eating habits for this break which I have continued up until now. That's the biggest thing for me to consciously work on now because I know that it is a long running stress response.
First day of 3.3.1 I felt some energy movement. Then not much until the 7th day I felt a large amount of energy movement. I have been to that point before where it feels like something is about to break through and shift massively, but it never really gets over the hump. It didn't this time either. I feel like I don't have a lack of energy, but there is a lack of flow. Things are dammed up and I need to be able to release some energy that I am holding on to. Energy flows in but not back out which makes things stagnant.
The first night off I dreamed about being hypnotized and someone was doing some kind of psychic surgery on my spine. The second night of break I dreamed about being in some kind of night club like place where many hot women were dancing. I walked through and most of them looked at me and smiled. Then as I was leaving the place, one woman near the exit smiled at me as I passed. I decided to turn around and approach her. As soon as I did, she rejected me immediately and harshly.
I'm still very tired all the time.
(01-31-2019, 11:02 PM)Just Saiyan Wrote: [ -> ]On the last week of 3.3, I ate healthy. Then I took the break plus a few days waiting for 3.3.1 and went back to unhealthy eating habits for this break which I have continued up until now. That's the biggest thing for me to consciously work on now because I know that it is a long running stress response.
First day of 3.3.1 I felt some energy movement. Then not much until the 7th day I felt a large amount of energy movement. I have been to that point before where it feels like something is about to break through and shift massively, but it never really gets over the hump. It all those looks takedidn't this time either. I feel like I don't have a lack of energy, but there is a lack of flow. Things are dammed up and I need to be able to release some energy that I am holding on to. Energy flows in but not back out which makes things stagnant.
The first night off I dreamed about being hypnotized and someone was doing some kind of psychic surgery on my spine. The second night of break I dreamed about being in some kind of night club like place where many hot women were dancing. I walked through and most of them looked at me and smiled. Then as I was leaving the place, one woman near the exit smiled at me as I passed. I decided to turn around and approach her. As soon as I did, she rejected me immediately and harshly.
I'm still very tired all the time.
All those loops take energy. Power to the max
On the third cycle of 3.3.1 now.
During the 2nd cycle I resisted hard through food choices, but also porn and fap which I haven't really done on any other DMSI's. Today, on the third day of cycle 2, I don't feel any urge for porn and I have eaten well today. I also am switching to masked today. So far I have been on hybrid.
One of the days off after cycle 2 I had already "released" before going to sleep and then had an extremely sexual dream and released again while sleeping.
Still dealing with emotions about past relationships coming up. Usually regret and anger lately.
Still tired.