The razors on my lips, the poison in my kiss (AM6 Second Run - S6)

[Shannon]

Didn't try to moralize you. Just wanted to know if you're really running v2.2 and S5 at the same time

I'm not targeting you, brother. Just went ahead and got that message out of the way before anyone did. Anyone other than Shannon, of course. I'm expecting him to pop in and bonk me in the head for doing this.

I'm not in the habit of beating dead horses. You know what's what. The rest is your choice and your responsibility.

[chaosvrgn]

No sex occurred. It was my fault. I will say this -- I think you guys are going to have fun with this. Despite the fact that sex didn't occur, she began giving me some of the most ABSURD IOI's after about 20 minutes of exposure.

IOI's such as:
Uncrossed legs, spread open -- allowing me to see up her skirt.
Intense twirling of the hair.
Intense eye contact
Blushing when I smiled at her
Constantly, constantly qualifying herself
And most blatant of all: Legs tightly crossed, rubbing her thigh, circling her hips in a ridiculously rhythmic fashion. Like, imagine f*cking a chick from behind, and she's circling her hips as you do it. That's what she was doing to that chair. Like, she f*cked the hell out of that chair.

So, why did sex not occur, chaos? Well... she's an INTJ. I'm an INTP. This pairing isn't necessarily the best for speed seduction because we're mind mates. It doesn't take long for these two to get locked in a discussion of theory and philosophy, and once those critical thinking functions are activated -- that's it. You get so lost in thought that the world around you no longer kinda exists. The "S" sensory types can't really understand this because the physical world is so concrete to them, but for any kind of intuitive (xNFx, xNTx) knows exactly what I mean.

So... to put it simply. I was so lost in our conversation (which I admit, was very rich and deep) that her body language didn't actually register while it was happening. Seriously. It was like 15 minutes later when it dawned on me that she raped that damn chair. I was talking and theorizing instead of being in the moment and escalating properly. I can do that REALLY well with feelers (xSFx, xNFx). "M," the girl that I seduced on v1 is an ENFP, and most of the women I've speed seduced were feelers. I've never been able to seduce an INTJ. We ALWAYS, ALWAYS get stuck in "T" mode.

Now, that isn't a bust -- she went into a future projection mode toward the end of the date. Generally speaking, when INTJ's do that, that's a subtle sign that they do want to see you again. So, I'm gonna wait a few days and invite her out to something much more interesting, like rock climbing. Something physical. This time, to avoid getting stuck in theory mode.

Anyway --

This aura is very comfortable. It doesn't cause that weird burning sensation like v1. For whatever reason, I feel it most around my feet (root chakra?), although there was a time when there was massive energy pouring out of my dan tien area. I feel EXTREMELY wired right now. Lots of energy bouncing about. For those of you using this before dates, give the sub time to process. I wonder what would happen if I went around her with the aura immolating like it is right now.

The state shifting feels great. I had no fear, was very confident and I felt like my "true personality" was coming out: witty, intelligent, bold and dominant. I honestly believe that if I were out with a "feeler," we would've hooked up.

Seriously, here's a simplified version of a conversation we had, that illustrates the dynamics that occurs between cognitive functions [Ti] and [Te] (from INTP and INTJ, respectively):

Her: I really want to learn more about the MBTI. I can use it in my job. Can you teach me?
Me: Yeah, sure.
Her: Are there like, ideal romantic pairings in the MBTI?
Me: Yes.
Her: What's mine?
Me: ENFP.
Her: And yours?
Me: Well, it's split. Some say ENTJ, but a lot of INTPs report that they don't like how demanding an ENTJ can get. We REALLY, REALLY like other INTPs, but they're so rare. Especially for me, since INTP is a generally masculine type.
Her: ... My sister's an INTP.
Me: [sh*t eating grin spreads across face] ... well, give me your sister's number.
Her: Okay. She's really cute and really charismatic. Hold on-
She proceeds to pull out her phone and search for her sister's number.
Me: ...

Now, a lot of people are gonna say something like, "haha, she rejected you." And I'd counter with: "haha, that's why your @$$ ain't getting laid." A woman would never refer you to her sister if she didn't think you were good enough for herself. What ACTUALLY happened is that we were so locked into critical thinking "T" mode that she took my suggestion literally, because that's how [Ti] and [Te] functions.

To sum it all down: Most likely, she sees me as relationship material, not one-night stand material. Truth be told, as the critical thinking functions started ramping up, I stopped "seducing" more and more and started going for that deeper connection. It's possible that I began viewing her the same way. Dunno. Gotta let it process.

Or maybe... that's exactly what's supposed to happen to make sex occur next time. Now that I think about it... I did notice that I started ramping up showing how intelligent I was as she began showing IOI's, and when the IOI's hit their peak, I was telling her about mental alchemy and how I use my writing and businesses as a form of alchemy.

Sh*t.

EDIT: Thinking about it even more, I wonder if the state-shifting is internalizing my body language reading abilities. Before, I would consciously, continually look for it. This time, I only consciously did it a few times, then I just let the conversation fly. Since INTJs and INTPs crave mind mates, it's possible that the program was doing EXACTLY as intended. We'll find out when I invite her out in a few days.

EDIT EDIT: Uber didn't happen because I got a speeding ticket for a 70 in 55. I wasn't going 70. I was going 60. It was almost like the cop got a hint of my aura and upped the speed. When I tried to discuss it with him, he literally threw the ticket in the car at me and ran away, screaming "have a night night, drive safe."

[CatMan]

I just like doin' hoodrat stuff.

LMAO!

This is exactly what I thought of when I read that:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcqOgnQyXp4

[chaosvrgn]

would you say that was the dmsi effecting you or just your normal am6 self?

I am 100% sure that DMSI is affecting me right now. STRONGLY. I can feel the immolation. I can feel the state shift. I am beyond calm and at peace with the entire world.

I'm not even mad that I didn't get laid. It's almost like, whatever, there will be more time.

This is only from TWO LOOPS. Shannon recommended three, but I ran out of time. I cannot imagine how I would feel after running this for 32 days.

[chaosvrgn]

I just like doin' hoodrat stuff.

LMAO!

This is exactly what I thought of when I read that:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcqOgnQyXp4

I actually cited that earlier in my journal, haha.

[CatMan]

I just like doin' hoodrat stuff.

LMAO!

This is exactly what I thought of when I read that:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcqOgnQyXp4

I actually cited that earlier in my journal, haha.

Haha!

Another instance of us thinking the same way. I haven't read AOSI journals for awhile as I tried to stay on the ball with E2 until I got some breakthroughs. I didn't want to be tempted.

Sounds like you're doing okay so far with 2.2, man. I wish you the best!

[Shannon]

Were you using any mones on the date?

[chaosvrgn]

Were you using any mones on the date?

No mones, no nootropics -- was completely clear of anything that would affect DMSI.

[chaosvrgn]

Just went out to grab some food and business supplies.

Feels like the aura isn't projecting today, but I find that hard to believe. In v1, two loops for just one day caused me to project it for almost an entire week after. Interestingly enough, I haven't encountered anyone that I find very attractive either...

I am getting results, though. I keep getting these quizzical glances from women, though. Different than v1's "in your face, wtf is this dude" stare downs. These are more, soft and loving bedroom eyes: http://bit.ly/29LItbv -- followed by a submission (she looks down or smiles). This is the same look I was getting from my date last night. A soft stare, followed by a smile, or other IOI.

On v1, I'd get women doing these "hard stares" they'd refuse to break, almost as if it were a challenge: http://bit.ly/29RcU0p

This has happened about six times today. To me, this signifies that the aura is hitting them on a different level than v1. In my experience, bedroom eyes is a highly seductive, incredibly sexually-charged gaze. It's generally a deliberate attempt on their part to get you to seduce them. I would argue that, in regards to achieving our goal, this is a much more positive reaction than the "deer in headlights" hard stare. The latter usually means that, subconsciously, she's just a bit in awe by your presence. The bedroom eyes, however... indicates that her mind is already made up. She wants to f*ck you.

Based off what I've seen, I'm willing to bet that we're going to see an influx of v2.2 users achieving casual sex multiple times within the next two weeks. I'm just sad that I can't join ya'll in running it daily. 6 more weeks until AM6 is completely done. Then, it's on. Going to schedule a second date for next Wednesday. This time, I'm running MSI earlier in the day, which will give it time to process a bit more. Late last night, AFTER the date, that's when I really felt the immolation. I would've loved for her to get lost in that.

[Sickologist]

With v1 I got the bedroom eyes from women almost every day and lots of smiles. Obviously, those are much stronger cues than dear in headlights look which means you have presence.

Typical v1 experience. Was at a bar and this dude was about to serve me, but then a cute girl told I'm she would take care of me. She was smiling and very into it, I think they get more confident when the aura hits as it should.

[chaosvrgn]

Upper back is aflame. Keeps cooling off and then lighting back up as I break through what I'm perceiving as waves of resistance. I keep beating myself up for not "being in the zone" last night and noticing her blatant body language -- and I generally don't beat myself up for dates that don't end in sex. I'm usually like, meh, whatever. So I know this is resistance manifesting in the form of shame. I'll calm down, and it's FLAME ON!

My knowledge on chakras is limited. Is this the heart chakra?

[Shannon]

Upper back is aflame. Keeps cooling off and then lighting back up as I break through what I'm perceiving as waves of resistance. I keep beating myself up for not "being in the zone" last night and noticing her blatant body language -- and I generally don't beat myself up for dates that don't end in sex. I'm usually like, meh, whatever. So I know this is resistance manifesting in the form of shame. I'll calm down, and it's FLAME ON!

My knowledge on chakras is limited. Is this the heart chakra?

The heart chakra is felt on your front side, near the solar plexus.

What in hell are you experiencing shame for? You're trying to live up to someone elses standards of how much sex you should have and when. Who cares? It's your business, not theirs, and the fact that you're sharing with us is appreciated, but you're not being judged on this by anyone who actually matters.

The program is obviously doing it's job, clearing out those things that are subtly preventing the sex from happening. I think there must be an inner conflict in you that goes like this:

Public Chaos: I gotta bang this chick! Everyone's watching!
Private Chaos: But there's this reason and that reason why we can't, I can't let that happen.
Public Chaos: Aw, dammit, you distracted me, now what will the boys think?

Fuck "the boys". (Not literally, unless you want to.) You don't need to perform or prove anything.

The healing modules are apparently working you through those things in conflict within you.

[Illumi]

It's also an issue i've found when you know so much it's hard to keep it all in check, deep voice, being not needy, escalating, holding eye contact, being present, passing sh1t test and i could go on. I've found that " natural alphas " simpily do those things on their on without directly knowing about them. I could never manually keep everything in check, at best i could hold three thoughts when talking to a girl, touching her when appropriate, eye contact and drawing state from within. The other stuff im slowly developing as i progress as a man.

I've seen naturals alphas with 10 beta qualities i could point out, and about 4 alpha qualities. And i know pickup obsessed people who could mimic James Bond like a carbon copy, yet they had waaassy less sucess than the naturals mentioned.

Something Owen Cook talked about in his program Rsd Blueprint decoded, being not doing. Subs are supreme when it comes to inner game, but we depend on them way to much, some guys wrote on thier journals, can i please get DMSI v1, v2.1 or v2.2 before i go out? As if its impossible to get laid or get attraction from women without it.

[chaosvrgn]

The GSF module in DMSI is working a number on me today. I'm exhausted as all hell. I'm only awake because I spammed the hell out of my nootropic mixture, added some Adrafinil to the mix. Thanks to my AM6 training, however, this resistance isn't nearly as bad as some of the moments I've had in the past. Either that, or there's something in DMSI's GSF module that's preventing me from experiencing it like I have.

Just fell asleep for a few hours and had a dream that doesn't SOUND disturbing, but I find myself absolutely terrified just thinking about it.

I walked in my room and the power outlet on the wall was covered in ants. But, they weren't just regular ants. They were all blue and furry. They were absorbing the electricity from the outlet. I went to get some spray and a shoe to try and kill them, and they all started attacking me. The weird thing was, they could jump and fly. I was pretty much useless in fighting them off. Got bit to death.

This is the first time in a LONG TIME that I've had a dream like that. Growing up, I used to have this reoccurring dream about this entity that looked like the statue of a Roman emperor, and it would torture me. Halfway through my first AM6 run, I had a dream where I finally broke free and destroyed this entity. Never had the dream again. Since then, I haven't had any dreams where I was helpless against an assailant like that.

This leads me to believe that I have some very deep issues that need to be dealt with. Something so deep that even a powerhouse like AM6 can't touch. After CatMan's revelation -- and I commend him for his bravery in talking about it publicly -- I feel compelled to mention that I believe something similar has happened to me and I'm repressing it.

In S3 of my first AM6 run, I was walking around in San Francisco when all of a sudden, my mind was momentarily filled with images of someone (don't know who, but it had a feminine energy) doing something to me (seriously, don't know, but I know it was sexual) and I didn't like it. The images were so powerful that I fell to my knees and started sobbing. Fortunately, I was in the middle of the Tenderloin (if you know San Francisco, you're probably cracking up right now), so no one turned an eye to me. It only lasted a few moments, then faded.

There is something lurking deep within my mind. Ever since I was a child, I've always felt inferior to other people. Even before the racism. I felt like I attracted nothing but poverty, because I WAS poverty in every sense of the word. And it's affected my entire life.

I've grown tired of this. I feel like AM6 has brought me up to a decent baseline, but I always have this lingering sense of fear and inferiority in the back of my mind. If anyone's played that video game, The Phantom Pain, that's the best way I can describe it. It's there, forever f*cking with my life.

I see E2 and a third run of AM6 in my near future.