09-11-2015, 12:47 PM
Thanks guys, nice to feel welcome! :)
----- Day 6
I dreamt of standing on high ground and looking at the sun setting down behind a metropolis. There were these pillars forming up from the ground, made of some black scifi mini robotic transforming things or whatever.. the pillars were rising upwards, destroying the city as they grew, then forming these horizontal discs as they got higher, only to shoot up from the discs again. After a while they started to slowly wither away, glowing hot like coals as they did. Thought it was really beautiful and took a picture of it, lol. Also dreamt of things falling apart with the girl I'm seeing.
I was at a new gym today and there was a young hottie who clearly found me interesting. I ignored her at first as I was talking to this guy and, surprisingly, she got up from where she had been working out and walked to stretch her chest right in front of me. I thought she must be wearing heels by the way she walked, but she wasn't. Skillful. Continued to ignore her, then walked around some more, walked close to her, she was staring at me again and I talked to her. She was kinda warm and I was very relaxed, but it got a little stifled after a while, so I left. Some laughs, but she got a little distant in the end. Also, it seemed like she got in her head, because it took her several seconds to reply to some comments (to which I wasn't even expecting an answer). Didn't have any intentions anyway, so cool.
The only reason I'm writing about this^^, is that its just kinda hilarious.. I mean, she'd probably never in a million years admit she'd shown me any sort of interest at all, when in reality that's about as strong of an approach any young (hot) woman will do (for us mere mortals not getting approached everywhere we go). So... you know, why not put a little effort into it, yeah? Even if just to make it a little fun for while. Like, make a tiny joke back? Start a smile and not just respond to one? Tell me that you're dripping sweat and smell like my momma? Blah, always so serious. Yes, I could do better, but really, the guy has to be on his 5th run of SM and doing NG daily for her to even try a bit to see what's what? That's roughly -1% of the general population. Kinda rare. \rant
----- Day 7
Watched a little NG after that previous post (NG reel 2.0)... I'm so in love with Palmy its ridiculous :D Haven't watched any in ages.
No dreams that I recall. I held an hour-long presentation for about 20 people. I was way the hell nervous and I went through it kinda fast, but my voice got good as I went along and I made decent eye contact when I could. Went to a new exercise-thingy again and talked with a girl and a guy there casually.
Overall feeling pretty good & happy, but also tired. Nothing I'd describe as hard resistance.
Walking back home from the gym, I realized it probably doesn't matter at all how I actually look, because if I feel good & open, then I "look good" anyway. With decent clothing at least. This was first when I was sweating like a pig at the gym right after other hard training, and then as I was walking home right after showering with my hair just dried down (it looks like shit that way). Its all about owning it and projecting good energy, not trying to hide for fear of disapproval. I thought I must look like Jude Law, for whatever reason :D
----- Day 8
Feeling a bit antisocial today. And discouraged, because I put a LOT of effort (a week) into making this mother of all job applications and it was supposed to be a done deal to get an interview, but I haven't heard back from them. It just boggles my mind how getting a better job at what I do can be this difficult. It seems I really have to get a marketing degree or something, because the requirements and abundance of applicants are so ridiculous. Its just that I freaking knew I would've been good at this job. Yeah well, back to plan B.
I did install Tinder again today, and opened up one online dating account I last checked sometime on SM3. Currently I think both sex and traditional relationships are overrated, but I do miss something.. could be validation, maybe just some fun. More towards that NG feeling - open, warm & sexy, not bar, competition, gamy. I have a good thing going on already, but I have room (time & energy) for another one. Though, honestly, what I expect to find is a lot of clinginess and insecurity, doubts about men and so on and so forth, ha :D I have another old hobby I'm restarting on the weekend and I expect to find more women there than at the exercising things.
I was thinking that the types of women I really, really like have little or next to no fear when they communicate. You can see it in some of their photos, even. They're just very present and they take your attention completely. That's kind of what I want from OF - though of course a masculine version of it. So far it seems like the early effects are leveling off, but its still very early.
----- Day 6
I dreamt of standing on high ground and looking at the sun setting down behind a metropolis. There were these pillars forming up from the ground, made of some black scifi mini robotic transforming things or whatever.. the pillars were rising upwards, destroying the city as they grew, then forming these horizontal discs as they got higher, only to shoot up from the discs again. After a while they started to slowly wither away, glowing hot like coals as they did. Thought it was really beautiful and took a picture of it, lol. Also dreamt of things falling apart with the girl I'm seeing.
I was at a new gym today and there was a young hottie who clearly found me interesting. I ignored her at first as I was talking to this guy and, surprisingly, she got up from where she had been working out and walked to stretch her chest right in front of me. I thought she must be wearing heels by the way she walked, but she wasn't. Skillful. Continued to ignore her, then walked around some more, walked close to her, she was staring at me again and I talked to her. She was kinda warm and I was very relaxed, but it got a little stifled after a while, so I left. Some laughs, but she got a little distant in the end. Also, it seemed like she got in her head, because it took her several seconds to reply to some comments (to which I wasn't even expecting an answer). Didn't have any intentions anyway, so cool.
The only reason I'm writing about this^^, is that its just kinda hilarious.. I mean, she'd probably never in a million years admit she'd shown me any sort of interest at all, when in reality that's about as strong of an approach any young (hot) woman will do (for us mere mortals not getting approached everywhere we go). So... you know, why not put a little effort into it, yeah? Even if just to make it a little fun for while. Like, make a tiny joke back? Start a smile and not just respond to one? Tell me that you're dripping sweat and smell like my momma? Blah, always so serious. Yes, I could do better, but really, the guy has to be on his 5th run of SM and doing NG daily for her to even try a bit to see what's what? That's roughly -1% of the general population. Kinda rare. \rant
----- Day 7
Watched a little NG after that previous post (NG reel 2.0)... I'm so in love with Palmy its ridiculous :D Haven't watched any in ages.
No dreams that I recall. I held an hour-long presentation for about 20 people. I was way the hell nervous and I went through it kinda fast, but my voice got good as I went along and I made decent eye contact when I could. Went to a new exercise-thingy again and talked with a girl and a guy there casually.
Overall feeling pretty good & happy, but also tired. Nothing I'd describe as hard resistance.
Walking back home from the gym, I realized it probably doesn't matter at all how I actually look, because if I feel good & open, then I "look good" anyway. With decent clothing at least. This was first when I was sweating like a pig at the gym right after other hard training, and then as I was walking home right after showering with my hair just dried down (it looks like shit that way). Its all about owning it and projecting good energy, not trying to hide for fear of disapproval. I thought I must look like Jude Law, for whatever reason :D
----- Day 8
Feeling a bit antisocial today. And discouraged, because I put a LOT of effort (a week) into making this mother of all job applications and it was supposed to be a done deal to get an interview, but I haven't heard back from them. It just boggles my mind how getting a better job at what I do can be this difficult. It seems I really have to get a marketing degree or something, because the requirements and abundance of applicants are so ridiculous. Its just that I freaking knew I would've been good at this job. Yeah well, back to plan B.
I did install Tinder again today, and opened up one online dating account I last checked sometime on SM3. Currently I think both sex and traditional relationships are overrated, but I do miss something.. could be validation, maybe just some fun. More towards that NG feeling - open, warm & sexy, not bar, competition, gamy. I have a good thing going on already, but I have room (time & energy) for another one. Though, honestly, what I expect to find is a lot of clinginess and insecurity, doubts about men and so on and so forth, ha :D I have another old hobby I'm restarting on the weekend and I expect to find more women there than at the exercising things.
I was thinking that the types of women I really, really like have little or next to no fear when they communicate. You can see it in some of their photos, even. They're just very present and they take your attention completely. That's kind of what I want from OF - though of course a masculine version of it. So far it seems like the early effects are leveling off, but its still very early.
Thoughts, opinions and beliefs subject to change without prior notice.
