08-26-2015, 06:03 AM
(08-19-2015, 10:47 AM)Athena Wrote: Yeah, I'm possibly a switch and I was a sub to a Dominant for 8 months but actually I think he needs someone even MORE submissive than I, I might be a mix of all 3. Regardless, I DO want the other person to be happy too and feel he is getting his needs met and as I'm not FULLY Dominant OR submissive (but part submissive and wanting to explore being my Dominant too plus mostly vanilla but not entirely!) then I think what you said makes a heck of a lot of sense and...I guess what I mean is someone who defers to a woman more...like a lot of women let men lead a LOT in the relationship, usually I do too & I want to explore something LESS like that...but I think that the perfect lover, perfect boyfriend and maybe Alpha female (again not all at one and it may be a while before I can get them but I want them!!) might be the route for me to go. As I'm (Sorry I'm probably sharing TMI!) not fully sub or Domme. So a switch might even be perfect for me. I have an email sub who is very very submissive but I also see that if I was very vanilla or submissive with him he'd HATE that cos he's SO submissive. (No, he's not someone I want to have interactions with off-line, it's not that kind of thing. But he brings an interesting dynamic!)
Domination and submission are like the two side of the same coin. It's a common thing to say, "Submission is a gift", but so is domination. You are a submissive or a dominant, in either case, you submit or accept the submission as a sign of love and respect for your partner. You give in. Surrender. And surrender is the bond that unites the two. This is, of course, not exclusive to D/s relationships, but it is important to understand nonetheless as a switch. What I mean is: You do not have to "switch", you just have to go with the flow. I say it because I often found it quite puzzling why I am not fully content with either of the roles. Though later I realized that is because I was trying to be submissive or a dominant. And if you find that space within you, you will discover that submission and domination are indeed one.
