Robstar's journey to alphahood

[SargeMaximus]

I've noticed that spontaneous erections are a sign of positive emotions.

I'm definitely feeling good. Last AM run I was fairly depressed a lot of the time, so could be it.

Yeah I get spontaneous erections whenever i manage to clear something from tapping without fail. lol

[Vincent_Vega]

Wow, pretty much exactly the same stuff I just went through on stage 1 again, 100%. I don't know if my first run-through of AM6 was effective due to my speakers though... but this one seems to be doing a good deal. Looks like you and I are about at the same spot.

Yeah that's exactly what I feel. I ran the first AM through my laptop speakers. This one I'm wearing headphones in bed, and I can definitely notice the difference. My dreams are much more intense and crazy. Are you noticing feeling slightly awkward in social interactions, like not knowing what to do with your hands and how long to hold eye contact etc? Me and a few others have noticed this. Despite that, people seem to be more comfortable and attentive around me, so its weird.

Man, I will say... In the 3 times of AM I am shocked to be experiencing some of that again in AM6. Yes, I feel uncomfortable in social situations briefly. I don't feel like saying much and when I do, I feel like I don't know what to say or how to respond, most of the time. Also things with hands. Eye contact, it's not so much on how long to hold it, but I do find myself doing less eye contact than before. At times I also feel like I'm in a fog as a zombie, so that contributes to my lack of words and generally being very quiet.

I too switched up my way of doing it, I instead do the trickling stream mix all night long while I sleep.

I always thought AM is supposed to help you in the social area?

[robstar]

Wow, pretty much exactly the same stuff I just went through on stage 1 again, 100%. I don't know if my first run-through of AM6 was effective due to my speakers though... but this one seems to be doing a good deal. Looks like you and I are about at the same spot.

Yeah that's exactly what I feel. I ran the first AM through my laptop speakers. This one I'm wearing headphones in bed, and I can definitely notice the difference. My dreams are much more intense and crazy. Are you noticing feeling slightly awkward in social interactions, like not knowing what to do with your hands and how long to hold eye contact etc? Me and a few others have noticed this. Despite that, people seem to be more comfortable and attentive around me, so its weird.

Man, I will say... In the 3 times of AM I am shocked to be experiencing some of that again in AM6. Yes, I feel uncomfortable in social situations briefly. I don't feel like saying much and when I do, I feel like I don't know what to say or how to respond, most of the time. Also things with hands. Eye contact, it's not so much on how long to hold it, but I do find myself doing less eye contact than before. At times I also feel like I'm in a fog as a zombie, so that contributes to my lack of words and generally being very quiet.

I too switched up my way of doing it, I instead do the trickling stream mix all night long while I sleep.

I always thought AM is supposed to help you in the social area?

Oh it does, but I think the awkwardness could be 1 of 2 things.
1) Us noticing our microbehaviours so we can change the unnecessary nervous habits and stuff OR
2) AM6 creating a new way of being that feels awkward at first.

[Dzemoo]

yeah the libido is very strong on am6

[robstar]

Alright few things.
I was very productive today. Helped my Dad with heaps of stuff around the house, and felt good about it, whereas normally I'm very resistant to that kind of work. Felt more focused and did things faster than usual.
VERY angry and irritable at people on the road, and people in the gym. Had to stop myself from going over and swearing and yelling at some dude who was doing deadlifts right in the way of the only bench available. Went over and asked as calmly as I could for him to move it, and he did, but I think he had already seen my angry reaction.
And now I'm exhausted.

[robstar]

Slept 11 hours and still fatigued and lethargic...

[robstar]

It amazes me how many lurkers there must be on this forum! There's not a massive amount of regular posters and yet somehow these journals rack up views really quickly.. Come on guys, join up and join in on the discussions! Post your journals!

[robstar]

After filling two big trailer loads, and a huge hard rubbish collection, we have finally cleared the garage of the old house! Feeling a massive sense of accomplishment.Things I've been noticing:

My posture is brilliant and I thought it was already pretty decent.
I'm walking with swagger.
I go through periods of feeling like everyone is noticing me and periods of feeling invisible.
Emotional upheaval, crying when songs come on the radio a couple of times, and having massive nostalgia for some memories of the past.
Felt a desire to escape from my emotions by drinking poppy tea which unfortunately I did a couple of times. Am now experiencing a mild withdrawal. On the other side, less desire for porn.

Something huge that I didn't even realise I got out of my last AM6 run. I realised that I told all the girls I've slept with since about having a foot fetish.. The naturaliser made it not only possible, but easy and I didn't even think anything of it. But I had a huge fear in the past of being judged for it, and thought I'd never be able to tell girls.

[robstar]

Today's been interesting. I've been continuing to work on the house, and doing manual type work that I would've despised and resisted in the past, but now with a smile on my face. I've found my confidence in it, and sense of accomplishment when I complete things. When we were loading up the trailer I was even coming up with solutions and telling my older brother and dad what we should do when in the past I would've just sat back and waited for orders.
Later in the day, I found myself experiencing anxiety for no external cause, so I think I'm experiencing my first bouts of resistance from stage 2. Hopefully it'll shift something good.

In other news, its 1am here in Melbourne, so Happy Birthday to me!!

[waahbeta]

Congrats for the resistance.
Happy Birthday!!!

[SargeMaximus]

Happy Birthday bro.

[Light]

happy birthday

[LionKing]

Happy birthday! How much do you listen per day?

[Breeze]

Happy Birthday.