07-26-2023, 07:36 PM
Day 146
For the past few days, I've felt a sense of underlying unease.
I've spent a lot of years developing myself in my career field. Over the past year and a half, I've catapulted myself two levels above where I'd been for years (largely due to UMSv2). In my 'new' role, I've begun to establish myself as the "go-to". I'm becoming the guy that that client can rely on. I'm becoming the guy that the boss can rely on. I'm becoming the guy that my colleagues (several of which are significantly more experienced) ask, "How are you handling {insert expectation/task/problem 'xyz'}? Through all of this, I'm experiencing tremendous growth on professional, mental, and emotional levels. I'm facing situations that would have terrified me into giving up and quitting as recently as a year ago (yes, even while running UMSv2). But although I've taken some minor bumps and bruises, I'm succeeding.
The good thing about all this is that the more I grow, the more I'm challenged. And the more I'm challenged, the more I grow...and on and on. But, the deeper I get into this cycle, the more I want simplicity. I want downtime. I want rest. I want peace. The more I accomplish, the more the 'returns' on the time and energy I invest diminish. The ratio of energy spent to fulfillment is out of balance.
I believe this is the source of my unease.
For the past few days, I've felt a sense of underlying unease.
I've spent a lot of years developing myself in my career field. Over the past year and a half, I've catapulted myself two levels above where I'd been for years (largely due to UMSv2). In my 'new' role, I've begun to establish myself as the "go-to". I'm becoming the guy that that client can rely on. I'm becoming the guy that the boss can rely on. I'm becoming the guy that my colleagues (several of which are significantly more experienced) ask, "How are you handling {insert expectation/task/problem 'xyz'}? Through all of this, I'm experiencing tremendous growth on professional, mental, and emotional levels. I'm facing situations that would have terrified me into giving up and quitting as recently as a year ago (yes, even while running UMSv2). But although I've taken some minor bumps and bruises, I'm succeeding.
The good thing about all this is that the more I grow, the more I'm challenged. And the more I'm challenged, the more I grow...and on and on. But, the deeper I get into this cycle, the more I want simplicity. I want downtime. I want rest. I want peace. The more I accomplish, the more the 'returns' on the time and energy I invest diminish. The ratio of energy spent to fulfillment is out of balance.
I believe this is the source of my unease.
