When I was on the first day of my break Shannon announced the new LTU 5 would be coming out shortly and for those on break to wait until its arrival, so that is what I am currently doing.
Man I have really felt stressed as f this week! There is this girl I have been seeing who I made it clear from the get go I just wanted to be friends with benefits and nothing more. This relationship has been MUCH different than the typical friends with benefits/ hook up relationships I have though. We have hung out a TON over the last few months and I was really starting to feel something more for her. I have been all stressed about if I should officially ask her to be my girlfriend or not, as I do care for this girl a lot, but at the same time am not 100 percent sure if it is what I want. I really value my freedom, space , and alone time, and while I have hooked up with many girls over the past few years have not had an actual girlfriend in about 7 now. So I was not taking this decision lightly.
Anyways she also made clear from the beginning that she was still hung up on her ex and was potentially trying to still make things work with him, and that them getting back together was a potential possibility. I said I understood and I was cool with that if it came to it. Well anyways because of a particular picture I was tagged in on fb with her, homeboy(her ex) got a little jealous and actually started giving her the time of day again and now wants to get back with her. She told me this last night and while I tried to stay calm and cool it did sting a bit. I had just gotten her a Valentines day present which I normally don't do for girls to kind of show her she meant more to me than the typical just hook up. friends with benefits thing. It kind of took her back a bit cause she didn't expect me to change my mind about potentially wanting to date her.
I told her I still wasn't sure about the whole thing, but that I was considering it now. I also told her though that if she planned to get back with him that it was best for us to stoop seeing each other. Out of respect to her relationship and us as well as. That was how we left things last night, but now she is texting me saying she thinks she might have made a huge mistake and how much she cares about me and how while she wanted to get back with him shes been having more fun with me this whole time, and what an awesome person she thinks I am ect. She said she never expected me to change my mind because I seemed so independent and set on my own goals. So I am really not sure where things are gonna go with this now... the whole thing really just kind of rubs me the wrong way. I care about her more than any other girl since my last girlfriend, but at the same time I want a gf that I am ALWAYS the number one pick of. So I guess we will see how this whole mess plays out lol.
I will say that even though it stung a bit I was surprisingly calm and able to articulate my feelings while she broke the news to me in person.And also now even though I feel a bit down about the whole thing now I feel like I could definitely be handling the situation worse mentally and emotionally. Hoping this new version of LTU 5 helps me get through whatever may still be to come with this and stick to a positive based orientation of things.
Man I have really felt stressed as f this week! There is this girl I have been seeing who I made it clear from the get go I just wanted to be friends with benefits and nothing more. This relationship has been MUCH different than the typical friends with benefits/ hook up relationships I have though. We have hung out a TON over the last few months and I was really starting to feel something more for her. I have been all stressed about if I should officially ask her to be my girlfriend or not, as I do care for this girl a lot, but at the same time am not 100 percent sure if it is what I want. I really value my freedom, space , and alone time, and while I have hooked up with many girls over the past few years have not had an actual girlfriend in about 7 now. So I was not taking this decision lightly.
Anyways she also made clear from the beginning that she was still hung up on her ex and was potentially trying to still make things work with him, and that them getting back together was a potential possibility. I said I understood and I was cool with that if it came to it. Well anyways because of a particular picture I was tagged in on fb with her, homeboy(her ex) got a little jealous and actually started giving her the time of day again and now wants to get back with her. She told me this last night and while I tried to stay calm and cool it did sting a bit. I had just gotten her a Valentines day present which I normally don't do for girls to kind of show her she meant more to me than the typical just hook up. friends with benefits thing. It kind of took her back a bit cause she didn't expect me to change my mind about potentially wanting to date her.
I told her I still wasn't sure about the whole thing, but that I was considering it now. I also told her though that if she planned to get back with him that it was best for us to stoop seeing each other. Out of respect to her relationship and us as well as. That was how we left things last night, but now she is texting me saying she thinks she might have made a huge mistake and how much she cares about me and how while she wanted to get back with him shes been having more fun with me this whole time, and what an awesome person she thinks I am ect. She said she never expected me to change my mind because I seemed so independent and set on my own goals. So I am really not sure where things are gonna go with this now... the whole thing really just kind of rubs me the wrong way. I care about her more than any other girl since my last girlfriend, but at the same time I want a gf that I am ALWAYS the number one pick of. So I guess we will see how this whole mess plays out lol.
I will say that even though it stung a bit I was surprisingly calm and able to articulate my feelings while she broke the news to me in person.And also now even though I feel a bit down about the whole thing now I feel like I could definitely be handling the situation worse mentally and emotionally. Hoping this new version of LTU 5 helps me get through whatever may still be to come with this and stick to a positive based orientation of things.
