ICEMAN Evolution AM6

[iceman]

DAY 22:

Things are going smooth, at the same time I am feeling mentally tired. Having crazy dreams yet I am not able to remember much apart from pornography showing up and tempting me to come back like it misses me. From the start of AM6 (2nd day) my self esteem started rising and I decided I shall rather bang 1/10 girl than wank in front of a PC. But its amazing how this nofap plus Alpha combo along with some meditation is having an effect....there is a shift.

Not much exposure to women so I can't really report much today apart from one incident. Was waiting for a friend on the pavment which was near a signal. I noticed a lady stopped for red ligths and was just sitting there and staring at me (she was around 45 I guess) She just kept staring at me, I turned back and saw there was nothing else. I don't know if she was day dreaming, when I made an eye contact for more than 3-4 seconds she would just turn and look else where, then she would start staring again. Went on for 2-3 minutes. Strange. I wish younger girls do this to me, lol!

At work, I feel damn lazy. I just don't feel like doing anything!

[iceman]

DAY 23:

Everything is alright, all smooth, when I do get time to be around women I seem more and more at ease than before. The horse shit that covered THE REAL ME is all getting dug away and that subtle flirty side of me is returning. I went to check out this gym near my house and this receptionist was a 8/10 milf. As we talked she kept leaning towards me the whole time, I reminded myself to keep the eye contact and not to lean forward yet I was doing it all with ease, she came around the desk to get closer to me , I was not needy at all, yet I wanted to test her. The whole time she was asking me questions like she was building a rapport. Then I asked her if I could see the gym and she was more than happy to show it herself. She took me to the sauna and Turkish bath and she was saying that that part is unisex in a very flirty way and a wink. We continued talking, in between she did touch my hands now and then.

Then I went to get myself a sweater in the same building that the gym was situated. Again I found the sales girl extremely chatty with me and asked me the same pattern of questions in the beginning that the woman earlier asked, and kept chatting and when It was my turn to ask questions she was visibly nervous and a bit shaky in a good way. And she was not chatting about the job she was supposed to be doing.


Why its a big deal for me some may ask, its because I had this limited beliefs that I was kinda minority (race) around this place and even though I know I am attractive, I thought the Europeans might not find me attractive enough to sleep or have a relationship with me despite my success now and then. Stage one is pulling it out and throwing those shit up the air and burning it down with a blow torch. I don't know if stage one was supposed to do that in first place!


For the moment sex is not the most important activity even though my instincts tell me I need it badly for breakfast, lunch and dinner. In few weeks (depending on the recovery I am making while no fap) I will turn my attention to it. plus spring is gonna be around in no time!

Another thing I noticed is that I get this urge to keep finding materials/information to improve myself in every way. Ive been spending more time on those research than the job I am supposed to in the office. I think I will have to block the internet.

[iceman]

Stage 2:
Day 15:

For some reason I didn't bother to write or update this thread as I felt nothing was happening. Boy I was wrong!
What a change its been so far. I am only on day 15 stage 2, and the effects and changes have been profound. Not everything has been positive, senior colleagues and my boss were first intimidating or they were discrediting my efforts on some projects, they looked for mistakes, excuses to make me feel inferior, petty things like if they had nothing to point out they were bringing out the mistakes I made over a year back in front of everyone, I let it go on for a week because it came as a surprise to me, because earlier even if they said something behind my back things were not like this...Meanwhile I was having doubts if AM6 was making me a pussy. Well, I was wrong. Last week, I stood my ground and made it clear that I was not going to take it by moving my body forward in a confronting way and swear in between , it was enough to send my boss panicking running around and shivering because such an explosion from my side was never expected. Hell, even I didn't expect it. He invited me (15 minutes later) to have a coffee with him and we appear to move on. But the next day I didn't feel like working. Called it a sick leave, went to the river side and decided to read a nice book. Next two days were holidays (saturday and sunday). When I turned up on monday there was tension in the air. Senior colleagues and boss were keeping distance, while the other colleagues were trying to get closer to me. For the first time I didn't feel like trying to make up or pretend to be a nice guy just to be close to them. If they want my respect, they should show it. It almost ended up like there now two teams in the office, one-established, the other rebel with me as the unofficial leader. By the end of the day they themselves started talking to me like nothing happened. Its tuesday today. There is a lot more respect, lesser tensions, although my boss talking more politely.
I am not sure if others had similar experience so early on.

Now, personal side.
I am complaining and bitching more than ever before. But in the past week Ive been trying to control. Its also partially due to the fact that others too bitch about something or the other.
With girls, its interesting times. I am taking it easy, I had problems holding long coversation with teens earlier, because I was afraid if we were not on the same page, but for some reason I was able to find girls who were interested in topics I was interested, at the same time I am not needy nor do I get mad inside when she looks at other boys, because thats their age. I am taking it easy and letting it come to me. I have not yet read the dating books or books like Alpha Male 2.0, I hope to read soon.

Apart from AM6, I brought Paul Mckenna's The 3 Things That Will Change Your Destiny today. I started it yesterday. I did three exersices already and meditated last night before I sleep. Its quite effective. I have to complete 28 days. i will update soon.

And no PMO for the past 44 days too has its upsides.
I am enjoying the process of this transformation.

[iceman]

Stage 2:
Day 17:

I don't know if stage 2 was supposed to bring out the improved body language, because I seem to get increased attention by just my presence. Respect I get has improved, slowly people want me to get more involved in what they are doing. Not really getting bothered by all BS but still a lot of room for improvment, after all, I was born in a country where you are constantly bombarded by BS from the moment you wake up and I let it affect me, The . Maturity has increased many folds and some friends are noticing and the new people who I meet take me much more seriously. Not at all clumsy. I am not working too hard but very smart. Which is making a lot of difference. I am starting to focus on stuffs that make the biggest impact and leave the tiny jobs to others, this initiative I made without anyone asking me.

I have made some life changing discessions. I have been reflecting on my life in general. How it was, how it is and how it will be (in present direction). By some luck or coincidence I saw Paul Mckenna's The 3 Things That Will Change Your Destiny today and I found the tools that I really really needed to make changes to my life NOW!

So even before I started reading that book I knew that the direction in which my life is going is not the direction that I want to take and realize 10 years later that it was a mistake.

SO! I am going to quit my job in two months! :idea:

[iceman]

Stage 2:
Day 18:

Noticing the difference in the way people behave with me.
I felt a bit gloomy today when I woke up, its saturday so I don't need to work, so I woke up a bit late.
When I went to the bar to order a coffee the barista (in her late 50s trying to look like in her 20s) kinda looked at me as if she was not interested to serve, this I felt because she was all nice and warm with the previous customer. It was strange... Anyway!

Things turned all opposite when I left the bar and I entered the supermarket. First I am standing and deciding which sort of tomatoes I want, and this lady touches me accidentally and goes on apologizing like she made a big mistake. I didn't think much of it. Then I accidentally stamped a guys foot and he apologizes to me for keeping his feet there. A bit strange.
I am waiting in the queue to pay for my stuff, and when it was my turn the cashier seemed a bit nervous but I didn't really think of that as something to do with me. But just to test, I decided to pay with my credit card, so I gave my credit card and she didn't ask for any other identity proof. Because every time I purchased some thing in this city, they always asked for identity proof especially in this super market. Once they refused to take my credit card because I didn't bring any identity card or document which had my photo on it.
Anyway,
I am in the metro with a friend, one lady just walks in and sits right next to me despite the fact that there were empty seats.. and just before she sat she touched me (in my opinion it was just an accident) and she kept apologizing a bit longer than necessary. My friend thinks she was hitting on me because she thinks it was no accident.
I don't want to say that those ladies wanted to have sex with me, but I just noticed a big jump in the respect I get. Big time. To feel respected one must feel unrespected...
Why I am surprised or I am making a big fuss about these things ? some might ask.
I am consciously not doing anything to make these things happen. There are changes inside me but I can't pinpoint to anything. I just cant quantify the change within me. I don't know if its because of the change in my body language. I don't know, but so far I am just enjoying this process.

I can't wait to start stage 3!!

[stratos]

AWESOME.

[iceman]

Stage 2:
Day 20:

Still gainig respect. Its nice a feeling when the curve of the graph keeps rising. I am not there 100% yet. But its okay if it doesn't come that quickly.
Women generally feel comfortable around me. I take the bus to work everyday and in the past women or young girls won't sit near me unless they have no choice. These days its natural. And I am not freaked out. Earlier only the ones I knew were comfortable with me.
Colleagues or guys working for the same firm but a different department who never used to wish me or acknowledge my existence say 'Hi' followed by my name.
I think AM6 has changed my body language significantly and I am not able to point out exactly which part. its creepy in a nice way.
Shannon you Wizard.

Now, The not so nice part.
My colleagues who work in the same department are a bit uncomfortable with me. Especially the ones who were used to telling me what to do.
I hear dirty comments about me, I am not paranoid but one of my colleagues (lets call him J) did tell that he has has heard the others say not so good things about me. ( Things went a bit sour after I had an argument with my boss in front of everyone because I felt that my boss has the tendency to blabber and point little mistakes we might have done two years back. Despite the fact that the project was a success. I yelled at him back and let him know he was living in the past)
The interesting thing about J is that we never got along. He was always rude to me or anyone else who seemed like a beta. He enjoyed standing on top of people. he enjoyed presenting other's work like it was his. He loved to argue and prove people wrong.
But I noticed a shift from his side few days before I started stage 2. He has been agreeing with me 99% of the time. Funny thing is that I don't even care if he agrees, unlike in the past.
Mr.J loved to lick asses of the senior colleagues, now it has all but backfired for him. So he has run to me like a scared puppy after he noticed me starting to stand up for myself for the past few weeks.
Anyway, I am careful about what I say to such people.

I did have urges to look at porn now and then and I did surrender but not the urge of pleasuring myself. But its all under control since Ive started interacting with real chicks.

In other news, I have restarted 30 days cold shower challenge.

[iceman]

Stage 2:
Day 21:

Negativity in the office is rising because of my Boss's way of dividing and ruling. It worked out in the past but from now... it won't I am afraid. Eventhough I want to leave in few months, from yesterday I began to develop the idea of not leaving without a fight. But then the other part of me says its better to leave in good terms. Just that some are born idiots. But I am irritated and angry.

Mr.J is acting more insecure. Even though hes kinda more on my side sometimes I want to punch him in the face as he is going from person to person spreading more negativity and making the situation worse than it is. But I am controlling myself.

All in all, my self confidence is rising. Lets say my level of confidence is much higher than the time I felt towards the end of ASC5g.
Despite the negativity I am realizing that this is just a moment which is going to pass, I've heard and read about it but its another thing to feel it. I am meeting more people within the office who want to leave. I was adviced by some project managers also to find another place where they will allow me to grow as they do feel that my bosses and other senior colleagues are not going to let me grow. I did discuss with them that I would like to take a long break and they adviced me it is better to apply for a long leave (unpaid) and then quit, otherwise I am not entitled for a bonus in the coming months.
Anyway, I got a month or two to decide. fingers crossed.

[GlaizenGold777]

You, I, and Ben, we all report increased confidence in same day. lol. :-D

[iceman]

Stage 2
Day 25:

I feel like I don't give a ***k. I was listening to music in the office and mr.J suggested that I should reduce the volume as the clients are there. I asked him if they complained? He said 'no'. So I told him not to worry and increased it a bit more and the clients complimented that the place feels relaxing like a lounge.

I am horny as hell yet not at all frustrated as nothing happened, I kinda decided to just live in the moment. ED is has gone completely. Reboot has worked and I feel like a male pornstar. I am not frustrated when girls don't reply to my messages, I just told myself that it means they are not lucky enough, and God it works! They are replying to my messages with more text contents, and they have more smileys and phone numbers. While mine are getting shorter and almost no smiley at all... and about the porn part.... It doesn't mean I have been able to stay away from porn completely. While working I do look at soft porn in pinterest and my colleagues join me as if they are looking at fine art. The window behind me was letting the light in and sometimes it glared either on the monitor or the shiny floor. I complained and nothing happened, so I used the office's plotter to print out a 120X60 cm poster filled with sexy girls but I gave it an artistic effect and pasted it on the window and I justified putting the images of women because there isn't one in the office and I told my boss we need some women in the office, it would be nice. I didn't mean it in a sexual way. He looked at me like he can't do anything about what I did, and he didn't want to upset me. When the clients saw it today they kinda guessed who did it and one of them smiled and the other winked at me. I wish it was a woman.
Anyway, like I said earlier. 'its like I don't give a _____!'

Its been almost a week and I have been listening to Paul Mckenna's 'The 3 Things That Will Change Your Destiny' and its showing small effects. Its like as if its complimenting AM6 for me.
Some of the exercises are rapid visualizations and something similar to PSTEC. I am not sure if its better than pstec but its so nice and warm to listen to Paul Mckenna.

Another thing that is helping me out to make a difference is Cold shower. Its still kinda winter here and water is freezing. So those 5minutes are probably the longest 5 minutes of the day as I still shiver and scream and shake like a scared pussy but the anxiety I had to enter the shower box is reducing. Its to force myself out of my comfort zone. I have huge global ambitions for the future and the only way I can get them done is to get out of my comfort zone. So I will seek such challenges in future to improve myself. They are quite daring and intimidating projects. To do such things i need to overcome all the shit and limitations.
I have been thinking about attending a pickup artist bootcamp, it is again mainly to help me get out of my comfort zone, and not aimed at picking up the girls.... I don't know if it will work. But I am curious. I don't know if anyone has attended. It would be interesting to share the experience.

[Dee]

Stage 2
Day 25:

I feel like I don't give a ***k. I was listening to music in the office and mr.J suggested that I should reduce the volume as the clients are there. I asked him if they complained? He said 'no'. So I told him not to worry and increased it a bit more and the clients complimented that the place feels relaxing like a lounge.

EPIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol

[jonathan4all]

I am happy to see Iceman hasn't melted yet. Good progress

[iceman]

I am happy to see Iceman hasn't melted yet. Good progress

I almost melted towards the end of Stage 1 as I couldn't understand what was happening and things were just the opposite of what AM was all about.
But it did bring out the animal inside me. When ever I got cornered I fought back and stood my ground. Which was a turning point in the office for me. I have upset the order. Thats how I moved up myself from a junior to senior in terms of respect.

[iceman]

Stage 2:
Day 30:

Respect still there. I am much calmer. At the same time I still continue to give a damn.
My colleagues are stressed out and freaking out due to a tight time schedule of a project. I am still listening to music and taking the tasks one by one. I have heard and read about solving problems one by one but to finally start pulling it off is another thing.

One of the biggest change in me is I am slowly starting to detach emotions to a given problem and I am looking at them as they are. I am looking at the problems from both the perspectives. I am stepping in to the shoes of the people with whom I have problems.

On the downside, I still look at porn, Finding it extremely difficult to wake up on time. Procrastination is in another level.