FluffyBunny's DMSI Journal

[FluffyBunny]

Who knows i might have some issues deep down, I wasnt this good when i was like 18. I would walk into a club and stand there for 3 hours and not talk to anyone and go back home. But the thing is i already worked on it for few years consciously and subconsciously to past those issues, i am not sure what it is dealing with at the moment.

I was reading about the snipers effect. Interesting enough that is how I have been opening girls every since when i started. I would only open the hottest and the ones i like.
Thinking about about last night.... this effect seriously amplified, i was looking around and did not really see any girls i really like at all therefore i was literally in a ENERGY SAVING mode. This mode isnt very effective when you have to open with higher energy in a loud ass dancefloor.

Like i was down to nail some hot 7 and 8 but my body just wasnt doing what it needed to do to get them, i would open casually and then lalalala not care and go passive and then next thing i know i forgot about them =_=.

Did saw one hottie though, happen to be the best open and then i realize she wasnt as hot as i thought. Then i fricken stop doing anything again. wtf? like she has a banging body probly best in the venue but it was just the fact she wasnt exactly what i wanted base on overall, i some how just didnt go all in.

Heck i think i would have a better time last night getting off myself then going to the nightclub.

Usually i go out friday and saturday night but somehow I feel very unmotivated to even go out now.
Last week i was sorta sick.
had dreams about water for few days, and some random stuff , i think i blow up some ppl too.
This anger feeling seems to be getting stronger today, still seem to be kinda tired not sure what my energy is being conserved and used for.

what i dont get is how is me shutting down and feeling angry gonna solve my deep issues? We will find out ...


I was thinking what if i have a physical injury (surgery, aka not able to get in my ideal shape/size) issue that is associated with women that cant really be healed. What would the healing part of the sub do if it cant really be done??