EHPRA 2.0 Journey to Liberation

[Gandolf85]

It's time to start my EHPRA 2.0 Journal with...

DAY 1

I followed the instructions and I played only 3 Loops with several hours between them. I used the Flac Trickling Stream at fairly high but comfortable volume.

Effects: Intense Nostalgia, Return of Victimhood, Rage with Sadness towards a woman who is ignoring me more and more despite the fact that she was really curious to meet me few days ago.

I underestimated the power of Healing & Clearing of this version.

I hope this kind of suffering it's worthy the run.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 2

4 Loops today with Earbuds & Trickling Stream.

The storm is passed leaving a peaceful feeling of serenity that is deepening right now. This morning I felt some sadness & anger related to my poor Social Life that I would like to improve with people on my wavelenght.

The fear of meeting beautiful women persists.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 3

I did 5 Loops with the usual settings.

I'm more quiet inside but with some more assertiveness outside. During the last loop I would kept the listening forever but I decided to follow the instructions and ease myself into this powerful sub.

Some heavy thoughts pops up with less intensity and frequency and also I'm more focused on my business that is slowly taking off.

Very interesting times ahead.

I plan to stick to EHPRA 2.0 for at least 3 Months and then evaluate something more powerful like DMSI.

[kingcobra]

There is such a thing as flac files with these programs?

I've listened to this one a couple times, didn't notice anything, yet anyway, it's still on my hit parade though.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 4 is almost gone...

6 Loops are in the bag and I feel that my perception of things around me is changing slowly but surely. It looks like a more peaceful attitude with everything and yet more assertive in facing little challenges and situations.

Anger towards my father is there but I don't care so much about it like in the past.

I noticed that my palms are sweating more than usual.

I'm starting to fall in Love with this sub.

Everyday brings some fresh & new perspectives and I feel inside my mind that another software is running, so to speak. A software more gentle and inclusive of my personal limits & fears.

I'm curious about the direction I'm moving foward to.

[Gandolf85]

Day 5

7 Loops done and during the listening I felt a strange energy realising into my brain that I already experienced in periods of natural altered states before even knowing the existence of this Subliminal World.

A strange sense of serenity arose after the listening time interrupted by anger towards my father, jealousy and something intense that I would define as some kind of masked suffering. Something heavy inside without the conscious intensity that I experienced during times of serious depressions in the past.

Now I'm in a different quiet place, so to speak, which feels like a transition state.

During the day I dropped the plans to go out and test my behaviours and feelings in a big and crowded space.

Self concern & blame don't stick like in the past.

Everytime I experience heavy resistance I reassure myself that's a temporary thing and after the storm I will feel lighter and happier.

Little improvements everyday in different directions, I guess.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 6 & 7

8 Loops the last 2 days.

Rage...Just Rage and sweating through palms and feet like several months ago.

I can feel something blocked on my throat, something that wants to be released.

Let's see what happens in the next days.

This kind of rage doesn't want to share anything positive with the world.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 8

9 Loops done and finally the storm is now over.

The first half of the day was not so pleasant but as listening time increased I find myself more and less concerned with the inner turmoil.

Then towards the end of my listening time I noticed a feeling of unlimited possibilities at my disposal.

Everyday I also perceive the external reality through a different pair of eyes, so to speak. It's not that easy to find the difference between the days but something it's definitely shifting.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 9

Almost 10 Loops done.

Today the rage is strong but I care less about its presence. I know it's just some garbage that wants to be released out of my body/s.

So the rollercoaster continues...

[Gandolf85]

DAY 10

11 Loops done and I feel very light in my head with less concerns and a very quiet inner background.

So the pattern is: healing & clearing (the storm) ----> peace ----> healing & clearing (the storm) ----> peace ...

Everytime the peace I feel is more appreciated but also during the storms I can accept more & more the turbulence in there.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 11

Now after 10 loops I feel lighter again but today some violent/negative thoughts and anger were still present. Less quantity but still there.

However everything I feel seems to softened by some kind of emotional anesthesia.

Tomorrow I plan to test my emotional state in a crowded mall and see which kind of inner reactions I will have.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 15

9 Loops done and during the day I felt a sense of IGAF for several times even during some little problems. Nothing major but before going into EHPRA 2.0 I would taken those things on a negative spiral pretty fast.

I started the online dating game with a light attitude, so to speak, and I managed to to keep up a conversation with a superhot ukranian girl for 3 days.

When I go out I feel a light excitement in facing my fears, especially keeping the eye contact with strangers.

Also, I noticed that I naturally use a lower timbre of voice. Maybe ASC found a way to become a permanent feature.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 21

If this is resistance I didn't expected to face a similar situation of 6 years ago with the same kind of attachment and neediness that's pretty painful to be aware of...

During my play time on an Online dating forum I started a conversation with an hot woman (by my standards) and with just few questions and answers she proposed a meeting and gave me her whatsapp contact.

We started to chat intensively in very fun way through Whatsapp while building slowly into some photo shares, a skype call and also sexual jokes between us.

I just find painful to "re-face" something so needy and attached to a woman who I never met in person and I think that EHPRA 2.0 has found the most unexpected way to put this body/mind in this both uncomfortable/lovely situation.

I just hope it's only a healing/clearing way to face a deep wound that I thought I had passed.

Th good thing is that I'm developing/training my sexting excalation in a more natural and playful way.

[Gandolf85]

DAY 22

9 Loops done today.

During the day I tried to control this powerful neediness and sense of attachment to this woman or, still better, the idea I have of her.

This is an unpleasant feeling to deal with as I lived in a more detached way (emotionally speaking) towards almost everything during the weeks prior to this online encounter.

I forgotten the power of those feelings and life & EHPRA 2.0 has made a tag team to forcing me to face them without any help in overcoming them, but some unknown healing is in progress anyway. Or maybe this is healing that I really need to overcome once and for all this sense of attachment to an ideal perfect woman.

That's an incredible curvy ball that I never expected to arrive at this time.