06-20-2016, 03:07 AM
Day 12
I am having this strange realisation of one of my fears, a fear I never could have imagined I had, the fear of becoming financially wealthy. This comes as a big surprise because I have always wanted to be rich. Who doesn't?
On my very first post on this forum, I shared that I worried about becoming a jerk if I do subs like Alpha Male as it may cause a shift in my perspective, thereby causing me to let go of my personal core values like being charitable, for example. I still want to be charitable. In fact, the desire is even stronger now as I gradually let go of the fear of becoming super wealthy.
The problem is so subtle that it is very, very easy to miss. It lies in this question "Why do I want to become wealthy?". I have always had a justifiable reason - to help the poor, donate to charity etc. The key word here is Justify. The moment you try to justify something is an indication that there is an underlying guilt tied to that thing! Nobody justifies having sex with the husband/wife - they only do so if they cheat. Same with buying a very expensive piece of jewellery versus buying another which is much cheaper. We try to justify the former and not the later. Why? Because somewhere inside us, we believe it's bad to spend that much money on jewellery. I know this is subjective, but you get my point.
I still want to help the poor, to donate to charity, and help make the world a better place with my own tiny contributions, not to justify becoming rich, but because it will make me happier.
So, why do I want to become financially wealthy? BECAUSE IT'S NOBLE!
I am having this strange realisation of one of my fears, a fear I never could have imagined I had, the fear of becoming financially wealthy. This comes as a big surprise because I have always wanted to be rich. Who doesn't?
On my very first post on this forum, I shared that I worried about becoming a jerk if I do subs like Alpha Male as it may cause a shift in my perspective, thereby causing me to let go of my personal core values like being charitable, for example. I still want to be charitable. In fact, the desire is even stronger now as I gradually let go of the fear of becoming super wealthy.
The problem is so subtle that it is very, very easy to miss. It lies in this question "Why do I want to become wealthy?". I have always had a justifiable reason - to help the poor, donate to charity etc. The key word here is Justify. The moment you try to justify something is an indication that there is an underlying guilt tied to that thing! Nobody justifies having sex with the husband/wife - they only do so if they cheat. Same with buying a very expensive piece of jewellery versus buying another which is much cheaper. We try to justify the former and not the later. Why? Because somewhere inside us, we believe it's bad to spend that much money on jewellery. I know this is subjective, but you get my point.
I still want to help the poor, to donate to charity, and help make the world a better place with my own tiny contributions, not to justify becoming rich, but because it will make me happier.
So, why do I want to become financially wealthy? BECAUSE IT'S NOBLE!
Confront your problems. Walk away from BS. Seek wisdom to know the difference.
