DMSI v3.1: User Acceptance Testing

[RTBoss]

Day 5 on B
Running option 'B' is proving to be a bit of a roller coaster. I have been experiencing changes in my mood and energy all through the day. They range from excited, wanting to dance to music playing to downright sad and feeling lonely.

At work, my desire to even complete my work has gone. At home, there is no motivation to even do the dishes or laundry or clean up.

Also, my focus is a bit off. I think the sub is moving shaping me to only think about girls. Other things are taking a back seat. For example, I even forgot to pay my health insurance and certain other things which are a given.

I have had a bit of this, as well. Sometimes I don't know where my head is at. Not quite as bad as my experience on V2.1 concerning that, but it's like my mind is too preoccupied to do certain (simple) things right.

[hunk]

Day 5 on B (contd.)
Feeling a lot of energy on B. Went to gym second time in last five days (since started running B) and my workouts have been vigorous.

I am liking these bursts of energy.

[hunk]

Day 11 on B

OK... so I haven't updated my journal in a while and I blame it on the B side

Long story short, ever since I started listening to B, it has filled me up with extra energy. Now it was upto me what I wanted to do with this energy, but B has been directing me in using this energy for improving myself or socialising and hence increasing the possibility of letting others be aware of my increased sexuality (I just made it up, but yes I've had more energy to stay out longer even after a long day of work)

So, how does B work? In my case every time I have felt a sudden burst of energy, it has meant that B was working for me. For example, last Friday I came home from work... tired and everything.

All of a sudden I feel a surge of energy and I decide to go to gym. While I'm on the treadmill I get a message from one of the girls on Tinder... she wanted to meet... that night. WTF! I tell her where I was and that I'd be able to see her in about and hour or so. I get there are 90 minutes and we spent a few hours together. Well, at the end of the night she wanted to go back to her place, but that's a different story altogether. TLDR version: we kissed in the bar, but she wouldn't go further than that and wanted to go back to her home.

In yet another instance I was supposed to meet a girl at 3pm. I felt the energy again and I was at the gym sweating it out. Must have been around 11am. This another girl messages me saying her plans changed and she was happy to meet sooner. TLDR version: when I felt the energy to kiss her while we were out, she chickened out and said she was shy and then when we were saying goodbye and I tried to kiss her, she goes: I like it only if it happens naturally. Anyway, she's issues she needs to deal with (not the kissing issues) and I don't think I'll see her again.

Ever since I started B, I have been going out doing something every single night of the week and every weekend. (Except for one night when I was feeling too exhausted after having listened to 3 loops for 3 days. Now I'm back to 2 loops) Be it going to the gym, catching up with friends, socialising, going somewhere where everyone's a stranger, going on Tinder first dates (3 of them) etc.

The point being "B" side gives you the energy and it's upto us to decide what to do with that energy. It also directs our mind in some ways. In my case it has made it harder for me to focus on work... LOL. However, focus on socialising and going to gym whenever I can has increased.

Yesterday, I was at an event and I met a girl whose vibe and energy was very pleasing, very gentle and very feminine. Sad thing was it didn't occur to me that I should try to ask her out or something. This realisation just hit me as soon as we said goodbye. I missed a chance there.

I was trying to analyse the situation with a friend later yesterday and it looks like the presence of one of my teachers there (who I have deep respect for and I think is a living saint) made me feel too conscious about picking up that girl in front of him.

Sad! But oh well, lesson learnt. Next time, move faster and think rationally (Unless of course it was the anti-sniper or maybe there was something else that my subconscious picked on which prevented me from even thinking about the possibility of her asking her out for the few hours we spent together)

The downside however, of running B, has been that when I'm by myself I have at times felt a sense of loneliness and sadness.

[SargeMaximus]

The downside however, of running B, has been that when I'm by myself I have at times felt a sense of loneliness and sadness.

I have this to the extreme. I honestly never cared before, but now I'm extremely lonely almost all the time and love being around people. I'm even considering being a needy orbiter (not exclusively of women, just anyone) so it's crazy.

[hunk]

The downside however, of running B, has been that when I'm by myself I have at times felt a sense of loneliness and sadness.

I have this to the extreme. I honestly never cared before, but now I'm extremely lonely almost all the time and love being around people. I'm even considering being a needy orbiter (not exclusively of women, just anyone) so it's crazy.

I must clarify... I don't have this all the time. It's only a small of amount of time I have this feeling. I think it also stems from the fact that while I was running "A" I came up with this realisation that I was looking for something substantial - like a connection with the girl.

Most of the times when I am full of energy, I'm in a good mood as well and I don't feel lonely or sad at those times.

It's been said on the forums in the past that feelings of sadness and being depressed are signs on resistance. Unfortunately, I don't know how to get rid of resistance; but one way that is generally talked about is powering through it. That is, keep going regardless of what's happening.

Hope this helps.

[SargeMaximus]

The downside however, of running B, has been that when I'm by myself I have at times felt a sense of loneliness and sadness.

I have this to the extreme. I honestly never cared before, but now I'm extremely lonely almost all the time and love being around people. I'm even considering being a needy orbiter (not exclusively of women, just anyone) so it's crazy.

I must clarify... I don't have this all the time. It's only a small of amount of time I have this feeling. I think it also stems from the fact that while I was running "A" I came up with this realisation that I was looking for something substantial - like a connection with the girl.

Most of the times when I am full of energy, I'm in a good mood as well and I don't feel lonely or sad at those times.

It's been said on the forums in the past that feelings of sadness and being depressed are signs on resistance. Unfortunately, I don't know how to get rid of resistance; but one way that is generally talked about is powering through it. That is, keep going regardless of what's happening.

Hope this helps.

Fair enough. I don;t believe it's resistance tho. If anything, it's making me more social and appreciating people more.

[hunk]

Fair enough. I don;t believe it's resistance tho. If anything, it's making me more social and appreciating people more.

Well... maybe it's not resistance in your case then. Also, it looks like you're making improvements in some areas.

I definitely attribute being "more" social to "B". I decided at the start of this year that I'd be more social and between Jan and Mar this year I forced myself to go out at least 3-4 times a week. However, the operating word there was "forced". It was an effort on my part.

Now on "B" it looks like opportunities to socialise are opening up. I'm not having to put in that much of an effort.

[SargeMaximus]

Now on "B" it looks like opportunities to socialise are opening up. I'm not having to put in that much of an effort.

I totally agree with this.

If dmsi can have the same effect on sex with our desired women we got it made.

I hope Shannon refines the program one more time (so, one more version) AFTER it's reached design goals tho.

[wolverine_i_am]

Now on "B" it looks like opportunities to socialise are opening up. I'm not having to put in that much of an effort.

I totally agree with this.

If dmsi can have the same effect on sex with our desired women we got it made.

I hope Shannon refines the program one more time (so, one more version) AFTER it's reached design goals tho.

I remember Shannon did say there will likely be another version after the final.

[SargeMaximus]

Now on "B" it looks like opportunities to socialise are opening up. I'm not having to put in that much of an effort.

I totally agree with this.

If dmsi can have the same effect on sex with our desired women we got it made.

I hope Shannon refines the program one more time (so, one more version) AFTER it's reached design goals tho.

I remember Shannon did say there will likely be another version after the final.

Sweet. Exciting times.

[hunk]

Day 12 on B

My day 12 has just begun, but I forgot to mention something in my previous post.

On day 10, I experienced the most blatant IOI of all the IOIs I have experienced on DMSI. I was having lunch in a cafe with this girl.

Code:

x--y
z
|
h

So picture the above as two tables in a cafe placed at 90 degrees to each other. Seating arrangement: h = hunk; z = girl I was with; y = an asian girl; x = the dude the asian girl was with... initially I couldn't see him at all as he was fully behind z.

So, while talking to 'z' over lunch... there were at least 4 times when 'y' (an asian girl) looked straight at me and stared at me for extended periods of time. Ok, it could only be a few seconds, but I'm talking about at least 4 times when I caught her looking and our eyes locked and she still continued to look at me for about a second or two (which seem like eternity in that situation).

This made me curious as to whether she was by herself or was with someone else. I couldn't see behind z; but when I had a look, I realised that she was with a guy and in front of him she was staring at me for extended periods of time. (They guy had his head down and was either reading something or was busy with this phone.)

Happy Easter everyone.

[hunk]

Day 13 on B

Day 12 ended up being emotionally turbulent because of certain events that evening which I'll talk about later - when I have more time to update the journal.

However, I have just realised that I have developed something in last couple of years - which is - I do not deal with uncertainty very well. I need a black and white yes or a no. This started during my SM3 run less than two years ago.

So, if a girl gives me either a yes or no; I'm fine with it. If she leaves it in the middle - e.g. maybe, we'll see how it goes or just doesn't communicate things clearly etc. it makes me very uncomfortable.

I wonder what the reason behind this is and what I can do about it.

[WIP68]

She wants you to lead her. YOU decide how you want it to go and she'll likely follow.

[hunk]

She wants you to lead her. YOU decide how you want it to go and she'll likely follow.

Hmm... makes sense. Great perspective.