01-06-2017, 06:45 PM
Hey forum members,
Happy New Year. New Year, New You.
I have been running V3.0A from Dec 1 to present with only missing Dec 31. I apologize for not posting, but I have been in the "set it and forget it" mindset since my last post due to what I will say next. I was not seeing anything external worth noting which was making me have resistance or feelings that the program was not working and becoming more needy for external signs of progress. I continue to push through and believe I was clearing/healing and still am. I believe this to be the case due to a number of things I have noticed. First, I went from being irritated by the sub at a moderate volume and would slowly become ok as the loops progressed. As time has gone by I can now listen to the sub at a much higher volume on my iphone (earbuds in) (hybrid TS MP3) and fee very relaxed through the whole process. There were nights were I swear I could feel what could only be described as TRUE healing, almost a mealting away of discomfort and deep relaxation. Second, I would experience a slight pain in different spots on my body such as back of calf, shoulder, side of shine, even around the orbital bone/eye socket. This pain would last a few moments and felt strange a little to difficult to put into words. Thoughts? Third, I have slightly began to feel what people call a celebrity vibe, it's actually made me feel intense anxiety at times like I should be doing something but nothing is more appropriate. I work in a restaurant in a very touristy destination so I see people of all ages and all backgrounds. I have noticed people looking at me both men and women, but doesn't seem that overt to categorize it as DMSI, idk. Also children especially babies look at me with a stare through their pure little baby eyes that is like wtf is this person. The infants grab at you and younger ones always say thank you without parents instruction. Overall I feel like I am healing something I just can not isolate what it is. Any thoughts on any of this please feel free.
On to something more meaningful. I went to the gym a few hours ago and ran into a female who was at my old gym. Before I left the old gym I asked for her number since I knew she was into me and I won't boast but I am out of her league. She would not budge so I gave her mine through the gym staff(she works there). When I asked her if she got it she said she did and I told her she is afraid to do anything with it, which I think she is since she is only 18 and most likely inexperienced. Plus I am very straight forward and throw sexual innuendos like nothing. Might have intimidated her. Well, it left me with a sour taste for her since she should have been over the wall that I was even jnterested in her. So as I go to my new gym she is there. Odds of that? DMSI maybe? As I see her we make eye contact and I can feel anxiety build in myself due to our last exchange, slightly ticked her off. At the same time I felt intense heat in my forehead. As I workout I begin noticing she is walking by me repeatedly and stopped listening to music on her headphones. She did some squats within my proximity, seemed like that just happened due to where we both were in the gym, but idk. I continued to feel heat all over me and noticed staring from other men. I didn't not speak to her due to her bitch attitude she displayed last time we spoke, I was in a frame of I am better than you and you should know that, even though I had this strange anxiety. On another note, I am already in good shape but took a slight hiatus from the gym and after only a few days back I am looking very shredded. DMSI? Basically this whole night had me thinking of the forum and the sub. The body heat, the stares from men, the weird anxious feeling, the female. Is this a manifestation? What may happen if I continue to see her there as I run the sub? I already had a feeling of why wouldn't you want some of this, but after more of the sub, what would happen? If you made it this far, thank you for sticking with me and any feedback, especially from you, Shannon
, would be greatly appreciated. Any insight into what I am going through would mean the world and I would continue to post when appropriate. Thanks.
Happy New Year. New Year, New You.
I have been running V3.0A from Dec 1 to present with only missing Dec 31. I apologize for not posting, but I have been in the "set it and forget it" mindset since my last post due to what I will say next. I was not seeing anything external worth noting which was making me have resistance or feelings that the program was not working and becoming more needy for external signs of progress. I continue to push through and believe I was clearing/healing and still am. I believe this to be the case due to a number of things I have noticed. First, I went from being irritated by the sub at a moderate volume and would slowly become ok as the loops progressed. As time has gone by I can now listen to the sub at a much higher volume on my iphone (earbuds in) (hybrid TS MP3) and fee very relaxed through the whole process. There were nights were I swear I could feel what could only be described as TRUE healing, almost a mealting away of discomfort and deep relaxation. Second, I would experience a slight pain in different spots on my body such as back of calf, shoulder, side of shine, even around the orbital bone/eye socket. This pain would last a few moments and felt strange a little to difficult to put into words. Thoughts? Third, I have slightly began to feel what people call a celebrity vibe, it's actually made me feel intense anxiety at times like I should be doing something but nothing is more appropriate. I work in a restaurant in a very touristy destination so I see people of all ages and all backgrounds. I have noticed people looking at me both men and women, but doesn't seem that overt to categorize it as DMSI, idk. Also children especially babies look at me with a stare through their pure little baby eyes that is like wtf is this person. The infants grab at you and younger ones always say thank you without parents instruction. Overall I feel like I am healing something I just can not isolate what it is. Any thoughts on any of this please feel free.
On to something more meaningful. I went to the gym a few hours ago and ran into a female who was at my old gym. Before I left the old gym I asked for her number since I knew she was into me and I won't boast but I am out of her league. She would not budge so I gave her mine through the gym staff(she works there). When I asked her if she got it she said she did and I told her she is afraid to do anything with it, which I think she is since she is only 18 and most likely inexperienced. Plus I am very straight forward and throw sexual innuendos like nothing. Might have intimidated her. Well, it left me with a sour taste for her since she should have been over the wall that I was even jnterested in her. So as I go to my new gym she is there. Odds of that? DMSI maybe? As I see her we make eye contact and I can feel anxiety build in myself due to our last exchange, slightly ticked her off. At the same time I felt intense heat in my forehead. As I workout I begin noticing she is walking by me repeatedly and stopped listening to music on her headphones. She did some squats within my proximity, seemed like that just happened due to where we both were in the gym, but idk. I continued to feel heat all over me and noticed staring from other men. I didn't not speak to her due to her bitch attitude she displayed last time we spoke, I was in a frame of I am better than you and you should know that, even though I had this strange anxiety. On another note, I am already in good shape but took a slight hiatus from the gym and after only a few days back I am looking very shredded. DMSI? Basically this whole night had me thinking of the forum and the sub. The body heat, the stares from men, the weird anxious feeling, the female. Is this a manifestation? What may happen if I continue to see her there as I run the sub? I already had a feeling of why wouldn't you want some of this, but after more of the sub, what would happen? If you made it this far, thank you for sticking with me and any feedback, especially from you, Shannon
, would be greatly appreciated. Any insight into what I am going through would mean the world and I would continue to post when appropriate. Thanks.
"It's only after we've lost everything, that we're free to do anything."
