04-20-2017, 04:13 PM
Days 1-12: April 9th-20th, 2017
Version: 3.1B
Format: Trickling Stream Hybrid FLAC
Player: Phone thru Headphones
Volume: 4 out of 15 clicks
Time for an update. This would be my first on side B.
Currently I am in a bad cycle. It almost feels like there's healing in side B, or it's the effect of side A still. A couple of days ago something happened that sent me into intense sadness. It wasn't that big of a deal, but my reaction to it was stronger than I thought it would be. I ended up crying for hours until my head started hurting. I'm thinking either situations like this would have been avoided on A, or its after effect made that happen, because I felt much lighter the day after, and today I was outright happy and motivated.
For the last few days, tiredness has been present full time. I can't sleep deeply at night, and I can't stay awake in daytime. It's crazy. I do not remember my dreams as much as on A. In fact, I only remember one, which is the following. I was at a hospital, which felt more like an asylum, that had surviving soldiers of a war. There was blood everywhere, and they had all gone crazy. One of them was uncontrollably laughing while his face was fully covered in blood, and another was talking to himself. It was disturbing to say the least. I was not going to mention it on here, but I remembered Duke.Togo and Dr. Strangelove having bloody dreams as well. So whatever's in B...
And it's so interesting that how similar our subconscious parts are!
On the flip side, for the first couple of days of running B, happiness, hopefulness, and confidence were the main themes. I can probably say that I haven't felt that good ever before. I also realize that the way my life is currently going, I'm going to end up alone. That's by choice, simply because I am not convinced of living my life with someone else. I feel that would lead to more stress and less freedom than anything else. I might be wrong and might change my mind. But that's the way it is at this point. Strangely enough, I'm okay with the idea. I fear it, sure. But I'm okay with it. Shannon and Duke.Togo seem to have mastered this and any words of wisdom or advice on how to take it on would be really appreciated!
IOI's seem to be more blatant now. Or I started noticing them more. First day after running it, I thought nothing was happening. I'm getting that feeling a lot on this side in general. No physical sensations whatsoever. So, after the first 2 loops, I went to a restaurant. I instantly liked the receptionist, she was pretty and was wearing a real nice outfit. Then, whatever happened, she spilled some water on her. So, she ended up changing her outfit and putting on a mini skirt, showing more skin and the sexy boots she was wearing. I'd like to think that I caused that
leepy: During the same time, 3 Hispanic women stepped in. Not sure why, they decided to show each other about some haircuts they like to have. That ended up with them flipping their hair in my direction in all sorts of ways. One of them even started braiding it, while pointing it at me! After that I noticed a woman across the room staring at me. All after the first run. Nothing close to this happened after that incident unfortunately.
Some random things to note.
Version: 3.1B
Format: Trickling Stream Hybrid FLAC
Player: Phone thru Headphones
Volume: 4 out of 15 clicks
Time for an update. This would be my first on side B.
Currently I am in a bad cycle. It almost feels like there's healing in side B, or it's the effect of side A still. A couple of days ago something happened that sent me into intense sadness. It wasn't that big of a deal, but my reaction to it was stronger than I thought it would be. I ended up crying for hours until my head started hurting. I'm thinking either situations like this would have been avoided on A, or its after effect made that happen, because I felt much lighter the day after, and today I was outright happy and motivated.
For the last few days, tiredness has been present full time. I can't sleep deeply at night, and I can't stay awake in daytime. It's crazy. I do not remember my dreams as much as on A. In fact, I only remember one, which is the following. I was at a hospital, which felt more like an asylum, that had surviving soldiers of a war. There was blood everywhere, and they had all gone crazy. One of them was uncontrollably laughing while his face was fully covered in blood, and another was talking to himself. It was disturbing to say the least. I was not going to mention it on here, but I remembered Duke.Togo and Dr. Strangelove having bloody dreams as well. So whatever's in B...
And it's so interesting that how similar our subconscious parts are!On the flip side, for the first couple of days of running B, happiness, hopefulness, and confidence were the main themes. I can probably say that I haven't felt that good ever before. I also realize that the way my life is currently going, I'm going to end up alone. That's by choice, simply because I am not convinced of living my life with someone else. I feel that would lead to more stress and less freedom than anything else. I might be wrong and might change my mind. But that's the way it is at this point. Strangely enough, I'm okay with the idea. I fear it, sure. But I'm okay with it. Shannon and Duke.Togo seem to have mastered this and any words of wisdom or advice on how to take it on would be really appreciated!
IOI's seem to be more blatant now. Or I started noticing them more. First day after running it, I thought nothing was happening. I'm getting that feeling a lot on this side in general. No physical sensations whatsoever. So, after the first 2 loops, I went to a restaurant. I instantly liked the receptionist, she was pretty and was wearing a real nice outfit. Then, whatever happened, she spilled some water on her. So, she ended up changing her outfit and putting on a mini skirt, showing more skin and the sexy boots she was wearing. I'd like to think that I caused that
leepy: During the same time, 3 Hispanic women stepped in. Not sure why, they decided to show each other about some haircuts they like to have. That ended up with them flipping their hair in my direction in all sorts of ways. One of them even started braiding it, while pointing it at me! After that I noticed a woman across the room staring at me. All after the first run. Nothing close to this happened after that incident unfortunately.Some random things to note.
- I have more chest hair.
- Girlfriend told me that she wants to eat me because of the way I smell. I had taken my shower 10 or so hours before that, and I haven't been wearing any deodorants lately. She was on her period too when that happened.
- I cried of gratitude for the first time ever in my life!
INFJ
