Become irresistably attractive to BW

[Majordomus]

But most of them are plainly spoiled by getting too much on the account of their appearance only, without extra effort needed normally.

I find that most of them get treated differently for their looks and therefore become somewhat detached and disillusioned form reality. The few girls I've known of that sort have all been socially inept; a little awkward; a little lonely and desperate for a genuine connection; and a very conservative world-view: "everyone's problems are their own fault, I have no sympathy". This is a massive generalisation on my part but that does seem the trend from my experience (read: my experience alone).

Thanks for your clarification, Wildflower.
I have had only one of the real 10's and she sometimes hated herself, so I am not an expert on this.
As for that last "everyone's problem are their own fault", I am little split about this belief myself.
On one hand, I spent several years dealing with my emotions and learning to listen to them and to the emotions of others only to realize how much victim-hood thinking I had lurking there beneath in myself.
It is like people sometimes literally feed on emotional dramas and consequently, recreate them.
In my experience, compassion can often slip into a pity and pity always lead to supporting victim-like beliefs.
It is tough, but sometimes what really seems to help is throwing people's responsibility for themselves into their face.
I know I do not always like it myself but I am learning to feel my dignity in taking care of my *****.
That does not mean one should refuse to lend a helping hand when asked so, after all, there is a certain degree of dignity in asking honestly for help and there is a certain degree of dignity in offering it, if the request is genuine.
Nor will I pass a person suddenly collapsing to the ground without doing everything I can to help them get medical treatment.
But I hope you know what I mean.
After all, many people in helping professions are almost addicted to taking people's responsibility out of their hands. It gives them control and personal validation.
To confuse the issue even more, some people are almost happy about this being done to them.

I totally agree. And I applaud you for taking responsibility for yourself and not playing the victim.

If you take a very general, black and white look at typical conservative and liberal views you'll see that typically speaking Conservatives will argue that each individual is wholly responsible for their own well being ( economic position, education, health care, etc.) where as Liberals will argue that it is the responsibility of the collective to help others. Gun control/crime is an example of this: Conservatives believe the responsibility lies with the individual and gun's are perfectly fine as long as the individuals are responsible. Liberals argue the opposite and that it's is the responsibility of the state to determine whether gun's are moral or not. I'm not trying to say one is better than the other. in fact I'm saying they are both right, or at least half right: you can be responsible for your own actions but also willingly take a degree of responsibility in helping others (and not refusing to help them on the basis that it is their responsibility to help themselves)

I don't want to start a political debate at all are anything (I know politics is non-debated topic on the forum) I was just using the political parties as a metaphor to suggest that whilst I think it is important not to have any self pity and take responsibility for my own well being, I still believe that we shouldn't be cold hearted and unhelpful towards others who are in need. Anyway, I hope this post doesn't come across as lecturey as that was not at all how I intended it to do so.

Thanks Wildflower, I appreciate your opinion.
Reaching balance between those two truly seems to be a genuine path to balanced being.
I must admit to be occasionally more inclined to conservative point of view, but at times I felt repelled by their close-mindedness either.
But if you have reached a healthy balance when you feel being in your center, balanced on both taking and giving, sharing and keeping to yourself, than I congratulate you.
As a side note, I think that there are two extremely powerful things about AM, by the way, in this regard:
Detaching yourself from the outcome and from validation by others.
I think these patterns extremely strengthen one's power in terms of being much more fluid with life.
This is something about the ego, that really probably DESERVES to be dissolved, as it seems to create a lot of suffering from great inflexibility.
Apart from that, I believe in healthy selfishness.
And your AM journal seems to suggest such balanced thing.
I am not there yet, but I have a sincere hope I will get there and I am looking forward to it.