Artemis does AM6

[Artemis]

Hey guys I just purchased AM6 literally no less than 15 minutes ago. I'm happy to be jumping on the bandwagon as I experience this sub and hopefully I have really good results. I'll update this tomorrow after my first night with this sub. Cheers!

[risingwarrior]

Congrats man! Good luck on your journey, you alpha mofo

[Artemis]

Last night was my first night with AM6. The first thing I noticed halfway through the masked track was that I felt like a fucking alpha. I felt like I took up more space and I really, really felt like a man. It's a feeling I've never felt before, actually feeling like a man. I usually try to be as unimposing as possible. The second thing I noticed was that I refused to take excuses from myself. This has been the #1 thing I've tried to fix and even thought was impossible. I sat down and did some of my homework, and even though I didn't finish it, the very act of sitting down and doing it was a massive improvement for me.

There have been noticeable changes in my levels of anxiety, guilt, and shame, and I feel more comfortable now. I started the day off like the most alpha I've ever been. I felt large and in charge, but once I got to school the familiar anxiety started wearing down on me until I became my old beta self.

I kept thinking things like:

"What do they think of me?"
"Does this girl like me?"
"Am I being too creepy?"
"What's the right thing to say/do in this situation?"
and constantly daydreaming and by the end of the day I was only a shadow of what I was in the morning. What was also really cool was that I didn't feel lonely at all today. Usually I feel very very lonely through out the day, and my anxiety and low self esteem often times make it hard to talk to others, but I didn't feel like I needed anyone today, although I did talk to others, a lot more than I usually do too!

The good news with all of this is that I know how to overcome it. Luckily I have both the Sedona Method and FEFT at my disposal and I can use both of them to take away this fear. The biggest obstacle for me right now is that I'm afraid that if I'm not constantly checking myself on my behavior I'll start to become out of control. I make a little progress with overcoming anxiety and other things but then I fear losing control and getting into trouble so I back off.

Right now my goals are:

Learn the Butyeko breathing method: I realized that a really big part of why I'm anxious is because my body isn't getting enough oxygen. This makes me anxious, gives me ADD like symptoms, keeps me in my head and makes it very difficult to sleep. I didn't even know this was really a thing until a few weeks ago!

Looking back I can connect the dots and see how this has been affecting me. I hope by learning how to breathe properly and more effortlessly I can overcome my anxiety and gain a little more peace in my life.

Learn to stretch and develop a light exercise routine: I want to learn how to stretch to keep myself less tense and get a little exercise in during the week too. Not too much exercise I'm thinking, just a few push ups and pull ups and such.

Regularly take cold showers: I took my first (semi) cold shower in a while in that I didn't want to risk getting sick so I stepped into hot water first. Hopefully I can make this a regular thing and I know the health benefits are well worth it.

Finish all my homework: This one goes without explaining.

Make an honest assessment of myself: One thing I noticed while on this sub was that I live halfway in a fantasy world. Sometimes I catch painful glimpses of reality, but I shy away and retreat further and further into my imagination. I want to embrace reality and make living really fun for myself without having to imagine what its like to do things.

The first step in me doing this is making an honest assessment of my flaws and successes. I have never done this and it honestly scares me. I know I'll be a lot farther behind than I'd like to think, but this is a very necessary step for me and I'll be much happier after sorting through all of this.

I've found that I often times just put a smiley face over the emotions I'm feeling. I constructed a very large, successful self-image of myself but It's all a lie to protect my ego and I need to go without it.

[Artemis]

Some very interesting changes in my perception of rooms and myself. Today I woke up and I felt like my room was some sort of grand cathedral and I was a god striding through it. Like what? Haha it was crazy, but I feel good.

I woke up in the middle of the night and I looked at myself in the mirror, half lucid, and I looked like the most alpha motherfucker ever. I was really large and felt like a damn boss. I was whatever supermodel alpha I had always wanted to be.

I had a dream that I threw everyone who was important to me or controlled my life in some way off a building at my school. I can see the importance of this being that I'm starting to value their opinion less and I want them out of my life so I can have more control and freedom.

Some interesting reactions from a girl yesterday was she was smiling at me, and then she immediately gave me a complete look of disgust, like I was appalling to her. Before this might have hurt my self esteem a lot but right now I find it really amusing.

I feel like I should be getting certain emotional reactions from things and it's weird that I'm not. I'm just a bit scared because in the past I would tell myself, and I would even feel that I was okay, but really I was not. This has made a bit paranoid, but I think I can learn to accept it with time.

I've also become very accepting of my dark side. The side of me that could murder and kill within a blink of an eye and not care. I know it sounds serious and violent but It's a part of all of us that we have to accept. Becoming more aware of this has made me feel more motivated and less resistant to change. It's not something I care to cover up anymore.

I'm also beginning to acknowledge my failures more and more. Before I'd just ignore my bad feelings because the Law of attraction said whatever you think about comes to pass, but I feel like regardless of what I do these feelings will come to pass anyway. It's best to just deal with them and come to peace with these emotions.

[Davidoff]

+1 for the cold showers, there are a real therapy and a great assist for this sub

Especially if you start your day with a cold shower and with some music in the background, might make your whole day great.

Be strong with the rest of things you're going through, and try not to think of so many negative things. When you go to the school next time, remember that that crow of people is actually made of individuals, and if you would take them separately, you can't always tell how many are that confident as they try to appear. And that you have a much better self-education etc etc.. I'm trying to say that you should think of the reasons of why you are better, think of your optimistic things.

After 5 years from now on (and even sooner), nobody will remember about some guy not being confident enough while walking in the school yard. You got my point.

For example, wake up in one morning with 1 hour earlier, and imagine while still in bed, that you are 80 years old and think ONLY on 'fake' memories of regrets that you got during those 80 years, as in a scenario where you wouldn't change into an AM. So, simulate how many crappy situations you had to put up with, with friends, family, future/actual wife, kids, bosses, banks etc (or maybe you're after financial freedom); either of these, think of how you went throughout your life and had these problems, do that for 1 hour while imagining that you're 80 years old on the dying bed.

After that, suddenly wake out of the bed, go to the bathroom and watch yourself in the mirror seeing yourself YOUNG again, as like it was given a second chance to you. Step in that cold shower and think about how many things you have to do in that day and the ones to come, and that whenever you will feel anxious at school or other situations, just get pissed off/mad/revolted by the reason of that anxious feeling or insecurity.

As the anxious feeling comes to you in various situations, you have to confront that bad energy, so by getting pissed of the silly reasons causing that feeling, something happens. You will starting to finally develop your confidence, naturally, by logic!

Good luck!

[Artemis]

Day 5! :

I had the best sleep of my life last night. It's been very difficult for me to get a very deep sleep but last night I did. I also slept for longer than I usually did. You can not imagine how I feel right now when I haven't been able to sleep like this for years.

I came upon some interesting realizations last night too. The reason why I'm so anxious and fearful of everything is because I take things so personally all the time. I'm personally affected by every little action taken by others against me and this keeps me anxious and on guard at all times.

I also realized that I have a belief that you can only be so good in life. You can only have a good job, and if you have a good job then you can't be a fun person. If you stand up for yourself then you can't have any friends. These are limiting beliefs I'm looking forward to releasing.

I did some releasing on perfectionism and my relationship to it and I feel like this helped a lot. Perfectionism has been holding me back all my life. Because I can't be perfect at something I won't attempt it and this stops me from doing anything.

Changes I've been noticing:

Less tolerance for bull.

More trust and confidence in myself and my decisions.

More alpha body language

Less anxiety

I'm finally looking forward to achieving things for the first time in my life. I've never looked forward to succeeding, it's always just been something I've gone through the motions to achieve.

More self validation than ever before.

I don't really care about women. I have general anxiety and it makes it hard to talk to others, especially women, but right now I'm just focusing on myself. Women do approach me now more than they did before, but I'm not trying to get a girlfriend.

Acceptance of my failures is going up. Before when I failed I'd lie to myself to make myself feel better and change my perception of things to suit me. I've twisted the truth so much I don't even know where I stand with myself. I'm also accepting things like the fact that I've been depressed or anxious for these last few years. I refused to accept it because I believed if I didn't it would to away. But now I see that I have to get through it.

I'm connecting with my deeper beliefs more than ever. Beliefs I didn't even know I had or thought of are becoming more apparent.

[Artemis]

+1 for the cold showers, there are a real therapy and a great assist for this sub

Especially if you start your day with a cold shower and with some music in the background, might make your whole day great.

It really does. I feel like I'm only taking hot showers out of habit now. When I don't take a cold shower I feel bad both physically and mentally because I know it was something I should have done.

Be strong with the rest of things you're going through, and try not to think of so many negative things. When you go to the school next time, remember that that crow of people is actually made of individuals, and if you would take them separately, you can't always tell how many are that confident as they try to appear.

That's a really good way to think about it, that this crowd is made up of individuals. I have a negative view of "society" but really society is made up of individuals so I should probably make an effort to get to know these individuals rather than placing them in a little box.

And that you have a much better self-education etc etc.. I'm trying to say that you should think of the reasons of why you are better, think of your optimistic things.

I don't want to feel like I'm better. I love myself and my qualities but I'd rather just feel like we're equal and not have to compete.

After 5 years from now on (and even sooner), nobody will remember about some guy not being confident enough while walking in the school yard. You got my point.

Very true. The year is almost over and I will never see 99% of these people ever again.

For example, wake up in one morning with 1 hour earlier, and imagine while still in bed, that you are 80 years old and think ONLY on 'fake' memories of regrets that you got during those 80 years, as in a scenario where you wouldn't change into an AM. So, simulate how many crappy situations you had to put up with, with friends, family, future/actual wife, kids, bosses, banks etc (or maybe you're after financial freedom); either of these, think of how you went throughout your life and had these problems, do that for 1 hour while imagining that you're 80 years old on the dying bed.

After that, suddenly wake out of the bed, go to the bathroom and watch yourself in the mirror seeing yourself YOUNG again, as like it was given a second chance to you. Step in that cold shower and think about how many things you have to do in that day and the ones to come, and that whenever you will feel anxious at school or other situations, just get pissed off/mad/revolted by the reason of that anxious feeling or insecurity.

I'm not sure if anger would be the best way to confront my anxiety. Using the Sedona method I'd rather just welcome it and release it rather than get angry and perpetuate a negative cycle.

Thanks for making this post David, really appreciate your insight.

Yesterday I talked to an active listener at 7cupsoftea.com. I talked to him about an issue that has been bugging me for years and was the whole reason why I started this self-improvement journey. I feel a massive weight lifted off my shoulder, which I hope will allow the effects of the subliminal to become even stronger.

I realized a problem that has been holding me back for a long time. Whenever I succeed or fail, I look at myself only from the perspective of that success or failure. Everything else is forgotten. This gives me a very skewed view of myself. When I look at the overall picture though, I'm never as bad or as good as I think I am. I'm making it my mission to adjust to what I just discovered. It's kind of difficult though because when I succeed of course I only want to see my success, and when I fail it's hard to come out of a downward spiral and really give myself the credit that I deserve.

I've also been noticing where my desires come from. I'm trying to improve myself because I think that deep inside I'm not OK, and I feel like when I continue coming from this view of myself, I'm only going to attract more and more of this attitude. I don't have to improve because I feel like I'm not OK with myself, but rather I can improve because I choose to make my life better and etc.

Something really cool that has happened is that lately when I think of other people in my life, I always see them cheering me on and congratulating me. Before I would think of other people so I could see my flaws through their eyes and try to correct them, but now they all seem to be really accepting (in my own head.)

When I had finished talking with my active listener he recommended I get some medication for my depression and anxiety. I agreed that it would probably be for the best, since I had been avoiding getting medication for a while. Considering that I live in California I'm eligible for a medical card for medical marijuana, which I'm not a big fan of, but seems to be better than taking any actual medication. My intolerance for the drug really stems from the pothead culture, but I'd be interested in taking it if it had any medical benefits for me and was legal.

Shannon do you know anything about anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications, and possibly smoking marijuana in place of those two? Is there anything you could tell me outside of what I could Google that would help me make an informed choice?

[Artemis]

I think I'm going to pull the trigger and get depression medication. I always see small changes and I take them as big victories over this depression but I always end up back where I started. I've just been deluding myself for the last couple of years.... I've been avoiding this for a long time and felt like I could handle it but I've rarely left my bed in the last 2 years. It's certainly gotten better, but this is pretty crucial so I can step up to the plate for whatever else is going on in my life.

I'm going to PM Shannon to ask him about taking antidepressants with the sub.

[adam225]

Why not go and see a hypnotherapist (a decent one) ? Anti depressants don't deal with the cause of your depression - they just distract you from the horrible feelings. You need to deal directly with the cause; not just cover it up....

[MJ1]

you have to remove the source not the output.

[Artemis]

Why not go and see a hypnotherapist (a decent one) ? Anti depressants don't deal with the cause of your depression - they just distract you from the horrible feelings. You need to deal directly with the cause; not just cover it up....

I think part of AM6 stage one, for me at least, is dealing with problems that I would normally just cover up and ignore. I've been ignoring being depressed and experiencing less and less happiness for the last two years of my life and I can't continue deluding myself into believing I'm OK.

Tapping and Sedona have both helped a lot but I don't believe I'm at where I should be at, and for now I want to take anti-depressants, although this may just be temporary. Being happier will allow me to deal with my problems more directly, which I haven't been able to do because I'm always depressed.

you have to remove the source not the output.

I can't remove anything if I'm stuck in this negative cycle where I can lay in bed for hours and hours a day and ignore being heavily dehydrated and hungry. Looking back on my life up to this point it's rather crazy how well I've convinced myself all of this is normal when in fact it's not.

I'm an adult now and I can't tolerate another possible 5 months where I'm not doing the best that I possibly can, which is hurting my future and immediate happiness. Not going to happen. If all that's standing between me and a better day is some pills I'm taking the pills.

Day 11:

I'm becoming more and more assertive each day. Case in point, my reply above. I don't believe I could have ever been so assertive 11 days before. I probably wouldn't have been confident enough to follow my own decision. If I'm wrong, so what? I mean, who really, really cares?

My anxiety is being lowered more and more, and it's still not where I want it to be but it's improving every day.

I've noticed in these last 2 days that I'm very very happy to do my work. I clicked out of some porn last night, and instead of fapping took a cold shower. I felt happier that I made the right decision than I believe I would have felt if I had actually masturbated! I didn't think I would ever get a dopamine rush off doing the right thing. This has also led me to realize a negative belief that I hold: Work can never, ever be pleasurable. This is such a terrible attitude to hold towards being productive and working and I can see just how it's screwing me over right now.

Something I realized while I was scouring the internet was that Alpha and Beta traits can not exist comfortably with each other. I've been resisting this sub because I know it would make a drastic change upon my life, and it's something I felt like I wouldn't be ready for. I've committed to doing this for 6 months and I can't back out, so I'm going all in and throwing as much effort towards becoming an Alpha Male as possible. Geodude really inspired me with how he tapped on so many of his negative beliefs that when he started AM5 he was able to adopt the changes must faster and I'm hoping to be able to do the same.

I'm graduating in a week and I just realized how many opportunities for fun I've missed out on. I still live with my parents and they've become harsher and harsher with their rules and somewhere along the line I just gave in too. My parents would always isolate me from my friends and never let me go out, and before I would rebel and not accept it, but I gave in very heavily when my depression got worse, and it definitely fueled a downward spiral.

My only goal now is to move out and be able to enjoy being a kid, because up until I turned 18 this year, I haven't really been able to hang out with friends and I feel like I've missed out on a major part of being a human being. I'm also very bitter about it, but I'm trying my best to get over it....

I'll most likely be making weekly updates. I want to limit the amount of time I spend on this site and other forums because it's not making a positive impact on my life.

[stratos]

Artemis have you tried omegas (fish oil)..such as Coromega...they can help a troubled mind as well
https://www.google.com/search?q=fish+oil...ess&ie=&oe=

good luck

[Shannon]

Shannon do you know anything about anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications, and possibly smoking marijuana in place of those two? Is there anything you could tell me outside of what I could Google that would help me make an informed choice?

I was clinically depressive for about 7 years in middle and through all of high school, before I was diagnosed. The doctor would not allow me to leave her office without a box of samples of Zoloft, and her having watched me take one. She was shocked I hadn't killed myself. It took only a few days for me to have the cloud lift, but over the following three years I came to hate the drug because of two things, which may or may not be an issue for you on a similar drug.

First, I didn't know who I was anymore... the "me" who wanted to die of emotional pain when I wasn't taking this pill, or the "me" who didn't feel much of anything at all when he did take it?

And second, everyone I knew treated me as if I was defective and deserving of pity for needing "fixing". Whenever I got upset, no matter how legitimate my reasons, it was suddenly, "Awww, have you taken your medications today?"

I wanted to kill people for that. In the end, I started looking for WHY I was depressed, and I determined that my depression was caused by an imbalance of brain chemistry caused by ingesting huge amounts of carbs (white sugar and starch) and almost no protein or anything else. When I started eating no more than 20% carbs, it all but faded. If I turned to a source of protein for those unusual times after that when it was coming on, I found that in most cases it would go away within 30-45 minutes if it was a brain chemistry imbalance caused by too much carbs, but if it was emotion based depression, protein would not do much. I learned to seek the cause and try to understand and release it, or fix it. I was on Zoloft for three years, before I stopped taking it, and I have been fine ever since, because I found the root cause and fixed it.

What I know about antidepressants is that doctors don't know how or why they work very well, and it always seemed like I was being experimented on. That dose didn't work? Let's try this. That dose not working? Let's try this. Maybe we should add this drug. Maybe we should try that drug. I didn't appreciate it. Some people are fortunate and have a good doctor, and some are fortunate and find a working combination of drug(s) and dose(s), and to be honest I am pretty sure I'd have killed myself if it hadn't been for the Zoloft. So it's not all bad, but I certainly would only use antidepressants if I had no other choice.

I know that Marijuana has a drug in it called Fuckit. I know Fuckit works very well, but I also strongly disagree with the use of marijuana. I'm working on a program to simulate marijuana's calmative effects, and I might be able to make an depression relief aid type program with similar techniques, bu that is not going to happen right now. Too much on my plate.

I suggest you seek the root cause of the issue and try to fix that. I'm not sure marijuana is good for depression, I am of the impression that it just masks the symptom and leaves you forever dependant - just like antidepressants. If it came down to it for me, it would be a doctor visit, because I am deathly allergic to marijuana/THC. Lucky me. But hey, if I wasn't, what sort of motivation would I ever have to accomplish anything?

Hope that helps.

[Artemis]

Artemis have you tried omegas (fish oil)..such as Coromega...they can help a troubled mind as well
https://www.google.com/search?q=fish+oil...ess&ie=&oe=

good luck

Thanks for the suggestion. I'll do a bit of research into it and see what comes up.

Shannon do you know anything about anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications, and possibly smoking marijuana in place of those two? Is there anything you could tell me outside of what I could Google that would help me make an informed choice?

I was clinically depressive for about 7 years in middle and through all of high school, before I was diagnosed. The doctor would not allow me to leave her office without a box of samples of Zoloft, and her having watched me take one. She was shocked I hadn't killed myself. It took only a few days for me to have the cloud lift, but over the following three years I came to hate the drug because of two things, which may or may not be an issue for you on a similar drug.

First, I didn't know who I was anymore... the "me" who wanted to die of emotional pain when I wasn't taking this pill, or the "me" who didn't feel much of anything at all when he did take it?

And second, everyone I knew treated me as if I was defective and deserving of pity for needing "fixing". Whenever I got upset, no matter how legitimate my reasons, it was suddenly, "Awww, have you taken your medications today?"

I wanted to kill people for that. In the end, I started looking for WHY I was depressed, and I determined that my depression was caused by an imbalance of brain chemistry caused by ingesting huge amounts of carbs (white sugar and starch) and almost no protein or anything else. When I started eating no more than 20% carbs, it all but faded. If I turned to a source of protein for those unusual times after that when it was coming on, I found that in most cases it would go away within 30-45 minutes if it was a brain chemistry imbalance caused by too much carbs, but if it was emotion based depression, protein would not do much. I learned to seek the cause and try to understand and release it, or fix it. I was on Zoloft for three years, before I stopped taking it, and I have been fine ever since, because I found the root cause and fixed it.

What I know about antidepressants is that doctors don't know how or why they work very well, and it always seemed like I was being experimented on. That dose didn't work? Let's try this. That dose not working? Let's try this. Maybe we should add this drug. Maybe we should try that drug. I didn't appreciate it. Some people are fortunate and have a good doctor, and some are fortunate and find a working combination of drug(s) and dose(s), and to be honest I am pretty sure I'd have killed myself if it hadn't been for the Zoloft. So it's not all bad, but I certainly would only use antidepressants if I had no other choice.

I know that Marijuana has a drug in it called Fuckit. I know Fuckit works very well, but I also strongly disagree with the use of marijuana. I'm working on a program to simulate marijuana's calmative effects, and I might be able to make an depression relief aid type program with similar techniques, bu that is not going to happen right now. Too much on my plate.

I suggest you seek the root cause of the issue and try to fix that. I'm not sure marijuana is good for depression, I am of the impression that it just masks the symptom and leaves you forever dependant - just like antidepressants. If it came down to it for me, it would be a doctor visit, because I am deathly allergic to marijuana/THC. Lucky me. But hey, if I wasn't, what sort of motivation would I ever have to accomplish anything?

Hope that helps.

Thanks for the advice Shannon. I've had a terrible diet so I'm going to get to fixing it. I never realized what I was eating would have such a large impact over how I feel.

I'm going to improve my diet, incorporate some light excercise into my life and begin taking vitamin D3 and hopefully that will smooth everything out. I'll give it two months and if it doesn't seem to be working I'll look further into depression medication.

Thanks for all your help guys!