05-19-2019, 08:02 AM
(05-17-2019, 04:46 PM)CatMan Wrote: Sigh...look...again...I see no value in this continued mud slinging, and don't want to get banned for continuing this as it's unproductive. In the end, results are all that matters with the program. Period.
Short version of my post:
-*I'm* warping the narrative and *I'm* attacking you..
Yet you have called me a liar, with zero evidence. Have now called me a "manipulator", which is bizarre, and also, completely without evidence. I'm a guy that simply wants to be able to finally attract women and be "normal". To get back the decency, respect, caring and value I give out.
-I twisted nothing. You called me dishonest, that's what a liar is. Now I'm a "manipulator". Deeply offensive to me on both fronts, as I am anything but. I have dedicated myself to a life of honesty and decency with others, even when I haven't gotten that in return and it'd be easy to turn and "be an a hole".
-I have no idea if my arm being broken due to the actions of a devious girl years ago is the key moment to this or not. Beforehand, I still struggled with girls and had a few bad situations, not as bad though, but maybe they carry a lot of weight in mind due to them being "older" memories. I have no idea how my mind interpreted that situation going forward. It may be the key moment, or it could be something I don't recall or don't think as much of, or what have you, who knows.
-"you're famous in some circles for that". Huh?! What "circles" are those? I'm known for being "dishonest" by people, am I?! What people exactly?! What did I do to any of these "circles", exactly?! Did you just say you're somehow connected to a group that talks shit about IML customers?! How would you know this information otherwise?! Did I read that correctly?! This really concerned me to read as a customer, who places my trust and faith and money here. I'm HOPING this is misunderstood and can be explained...
-I'm mystified why I get such vitriol compared to others, for merely reporting when you ask me to, give me nothing but shit when I do, then complain when I don't report anymore as a result of all the bs. I can't report about what isn't happening...because...you know...I AM NOT A LIAR.
Look...Shannon...I know you have a lot on your plate. I don't know if I'm an emotional punching bag here. I am starting to sense I am. I don't recall you EVER throwing insults like this. I hope you get through this seemingly awful time soon.
Look:
I'm reading every week about women and the mind, to understand them, and myself more, as I said .
I'm putting myself out there with attractive women every week as I said.
I'm trying to make sure the past is not the future.
I continue to "put myself out there" with said women, either by spending time interacting with them one on one, or by even asking a few of them out when I've really wanted to. Didn't end up happening. However, I'm doing everything I realistically can to help this process along.
Until recently, as you know, I was probably the most dedicated DMSI listener, most went to other programs over time. I've recently switched to E3 until the next release, thinking it was a better use of time, unfortunately, even though I HATE the idea of "giving up" on DMSI, at least for now. I've liked what EHPRA V1 and V2 have done for me in the past, programs I have recommended to those around me who needed them. Now, I've done the same with E3, and so far have enough for a report post I think, even though I'm hesitant after all this shit, to be honest. I was feeling good with E3 so far, this exchange kinda dampered it and wrecked my mood the past while. I'll try to put together a post, I'm a glutton for punishment, I guess, lol...
So...I resent the implication I'm "doing nothing to change".
I am NOT a "liar".
I am NOT a "manipulator".
I am NOT "doing nothing to change".
Now...please...I am BEYOND done with this.
Really.
Seriously.
Totally done with this.
In every way I can possibly describe.
Reading your reply gave me one though "this guy is looking for healing (healing can be replaced with anything, fulfillness, joy, etc) on the outside.
I think that you are looking in the wrong place, the only thing that can make you feel good is on the inside. No external results will ever be able to render the feeling that can be compared to what you can generate on the inside of yourself. External results follow internal states, not the other way around. And if you are in the mindset of looking for externals, I think this can be a hard circle to break. Shift your focus inwards, on how you feel and explore that world and change will take place. Forget about other people. Forget about that you give more than you receive, well stop giving then. Just stop. Stay with yourself. Break out of that negative circle and focus on how you are feeling and start making it a habit of assume your life from this point. And notice when you are doing things to get a specific responce on the outside. That isn't your genuine course of action, that is just you trying to fill a hole inside yourself with other peoples actions and however that make you feel. Start with looking for inside contendedness. You will meet a lot of people in your life, but the one that stays with you your whole life will always be you
