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AM6 Second Coming
05-11-2015, 10:01 PM (This post was last modified: 03-03-2016 04:44 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #1
AM6 Second Coming
Tonight I start my second runthrough of AM6. I was wondering if I should take another week or a few more days as it seems to be settling in nicely and i'm noticing more solidity. But i'll just stick to plan and start tonight as that's a week off. I'll make a video tomorrow and write some more as i've gotta go somewhere soon.

I do admit though I was feeling good about a second runthrough now that it's come to the actual day i'm feeling some apprehension and anxiety about it. But i'm continuing on.

I did something good tonight, the work i've been doing to help me with my business has really kicked in. I randomly went along to weight loss meeting without any prior warning to attempt to recruit some clients. I was laughing about it driving home because they were a bit standoffish.. but I realized it was me in a leather jacket walking into room full of mainly old ladies so no wonder. Funnily enough when I asked who the organizer is a girl was like "me" and I shook her hand and said "I'm Ben" and then was like "ooh I know you". I slept with her a few years ago hahaha. They also said they have occasionally had guests present but i'm the first to ever just randomly show up and present myself like that.. it shows me how much of a good step it was and that it took balls to do it. I was a little nervous and my leg was actually shaking as it was kind of like I was being interviewed by multiple women but I kept my composure and I think it went pretty well.

Not much else to say.. except that my second run of AM6 is going to be even better! Wink Watch this journal for future awesomeness.

I also just read all of John Alexanders How To Become An Alpha Male book in the last few days.. thought it would be a good idea before my next runthrough.

Start Stage 1 - Tuesday 12/5/15.
Finish Stage 1 and start Stage 2 - Saturday 13/6/15.

Start Stage 2 - Saturday 13/6/15.
Finish Stage 2 and start Stage 3 - Wednesday 15/7/15.

Start Stage 3 - Wednesday 15/7/15.
Finish and move onto Stage 4 - Sunday 16/8/15.

Start Stage 4 - Sunday 16/8/15.
Finish Stage 4 and Start Stage 5 - Thursday 17/9/15.

Start Stage 5 - Thursday 17/9/15.
Finish Stage 5 and Start Stage 6 - Monday 19/10/15.

Start Stage 6 - Monday 19/10/15.
Finish Stage 6 - Friday 20/11/15.

Videos -
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SargeMaximus, GlaizenGold777, Superman, Mr. Anderson, Frosted, TheChosenOne, adam225, eternity,
05-12-2015, 04:41 PM
Post: #2
RE: AM6 Second Coming
First night of Stage 1.. early stages are definately more of the 'aggression' stages.

Aggressive/anger dreams. I can't remember the others but the part I remember is that for some reason I gave my sister a judo throw and my dad started yelling at me and I got really angry back and I think I was yelling back. I woke up feeling triggered.. some anger, fear, other emotions.. can't remember specifically now.

But man i'm laughing so much typing that up at the dream. One thing I have noticed is that when i've had dreams like this with specific people that the next day i've seen improved interactions with them. Of course I can't say with my sister since I don't see her often.

One frustration is I noticed somehow my ipod seems to have paused half way through my Stage 1 playlist.. it doesn't make sense because that only usually happens when the battery runs out. I don't know but i'll just assume what my ipod is saying is correct and add 4 extra hours on this week and hope it doesn't keep doing it.
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05-12-2015, 04:55 PM
Post: #3
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Good for you man, going through AM6 again is a great idea! It's an awesome program, I'm sure you'll be really happy you did this.
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05-12-2015, 07:52 PM (This post was last modified: 05-12-2015 07:52 PM by Frosted.)
Post: #4
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Good luck Ben! Can't wait to see you become a stronger man. Big Grin
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05-12-2015, 11:42 PM (This post was last modified: 05-12-2015 11:46 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #5
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Thanks guys, I plan to have even more awesome things to report during this runthrough!

Had a good day today, went to the gym. After my workout chatted to the gym manager.. she told me she is a feminist and without hesitation I stated my opinions on it and it was an interesting conversation. I noticed some improvements on expression and expressing my opinion during my first runthrough but it really seems to have kicked in from my week off and settled in.. even potentially unpopular opinions that I more used to hold back on i've been expressing more. I like it.

I'm also noticing an increased intensity and focus at the gym.. that could be attributed to the 'seek the challenge' programming.

This girl I mentioned who seems to be a 'catfish' when I confronted her with it she's like "oh yeah i've been told my photo is all around the internet.. i'll put more up later" and of course hasn't. I stopped replying to her and she just sent "keen to meet up".

I don't know if it's my doubt or the fact this doesn't usually happen to me.. but my intuition is telling me something is weird here. So i'm going to 'test' her instead.. she will have to jump through hoops to prove herself cos I don't trust her right now.

Trying to differentiate between what is my comfort zone and what is fear/past trauma or whatever can be a challenge sometimes. It would be awesome if it was legit, she actually is that attractive and keen.. but it kind of feels wrong to have a girl reach out so directly.. I think I have some doubt to work on whether or not it is legit I can use it to bring up these emotions.
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05-13-2015, 01:03 AM (This post was last modified: 05-13-2015 01:41 AM by Benjamin.)
Post: #6
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Why do girls have to shoot themselves in the foot? I was going over to see this girl from last weekend, and messaged her to say i'd come at 7pm. She just replied back "sorry i'm not home.. I forgot about my tattoo".. and then another message "message me when you're free tomorrow and i'll let you know what i'm up to, I just totally forgot about my tattoo".

Thing is i'm already on the fence about her and this made me lose alot of interest. Which is an improvement in itself, and the other improvement is with these things in the past i'd be like "whats the right thing to say to this test shes giving me" where today it's "i'm not sure about her, she has to work harder now to see me again" and instead of trying to come up with a 'special answer'.. I just sent "maybe". Cos I am having second thoughts about wanting her in my life.. I love this mindset shift!

It's funny she's started calling me hun and love.. that kind of worries me that she might be too attached.

So she messages me first the last 2 days, then pulls this crap... good try but you've gotta do better than that missy!

EDIT: WTF. So after my last message I didn't reply back to her. And I see she is online on POF and she just sent me a message "hey hey hey"... kind of like i'm a seperate entity from my POF account or something.. does she really think i'm gonna sit here and message her now. :Z
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05-13-2015, 05:47 AM
Post: #7
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Sorry but the POF thing cracked me up xD "hey hey hey"
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05-13-2015, 06:08 AM
Post: #8
RE: AM6 Second Coming
(05-13-2015 01:03 AM)Benjamin Wrote:  Thing is i'm already on the fence about her and this made me lose alot of interest. Which is an improvement in itself, and the other improvement is with these things in the past i'd be like "whats the right thing to say to this test shes giving me" where today it's "i'm not sure about her, she has to work harder now to see me again" and instead of trying to come up with a 'special answer'.. I just sent "maybe". Cos I am having second thoughts about wanting her in my life.. I love this mindset shift!

Awesome. Love that.

(05-13-2015 01:03 AM)Benjamin Wrote:  So she messages me first the last 2 days, then pulls this crap... good try but you've gotta do better than that missy!

Lol, I was set to go on a date with a girl one time and she got hesitant at the last second, so I was like "be there or be square missy!" lol. Something about missy is just so appropriate for the female behavior at times. Tongue

"A leader is a dealer in hope." - Napoleon
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05-13-2015, 03:21 PM (This post was last modified: 05-13-2015 03:36 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #9
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Quote:Sorry but the POF thing cracked me up xD "hey hey hey"

Hahaha that's cool, it was annoying when she said it but now i'm laughing because this shit is just mental.

Quote:Lol, I was set to go on a date with a girl one time and she got hesitant at the last second, so I was like "be there or be square missy!" lol. Something about missy is just so appropriate for the female behavior at times.

Haha yeah I use it a bit.. but also in flirting with them. Like "stop trying to seduce me.. it's not gonna work like that missy!".

-Ben
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05-13-2015, 04:53 PM (This post was last modified: 05-13-2015 04:55 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #10
RE: AM6 Second Coming
I've just made a video a few days late for Stage 1. I'm uploading now.

For now.. watch this video. If you're into weights you will appreciate it. I warn you not to watch it before bed as I did and I was really pumped up from it last night. It's the most motivating and powerful video i'd seen for a long time!

The mental illness stuff he is talking about is hardcore and i'm more about positive motivation. But I can identify with being picked on at school and i'm sure some of that has driven me to become physically dominant as I am now.

This is powerful for me, I just watched the start again and it really moves me.



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05-13-2015, 05:24 PM (This post was last modified: 05-13-2015 05:28 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #11
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Holy ****. Something big just happened and i'm actually ashamed to admit this in a group of men... but I know you guys are open and supportive, I wouldn't admit this to alot of people in my life.

I've just had the most powerful moment for myself.. something massive must be being purged. Some could be attributed to AM6/EPRHA and other things i've been working on but the video I just posted was the catalyst.

I watched it again, and I started to get emotional. I actually just watched it twice in a row and cried... I never ***** cry, the last time was my grandmas funeral which is understandable.

But I can't say it was sadness or depression.. maybe at first, it was like it was greiving for some old weak part of me i'm letting go of, then it went to joy.. smiling.. feeling joyful while still crying.. my legs shaking...

It really connected with something deep inside me..

The part that was the most impactful was "So many people told me I would always be a fatass, I had to prove to myself they were WRONG."

This is crazy.. and I can't communicate in text how powerful it was.. I still am a little bit. I believe this is a start of something big. Holy ****.
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05-13-2015, 05:26 PM (This post was last modified: 03-03-2016 04:44 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #12
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Ok my video for Stage 1 that I made earlier. I'm not sure if it's just me but this time even since my finish video I notice a distinct positive difference in myself. Like just a solidity, calmness, confidence.. even in my voice. Like it really settled in from my week of and the first few days of Stage 1.
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05-13-2015, 06:03 PM
Post: #13
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Good to see you're going through some positive shifts Ben. Though crying isn't anything to be ashamed of imo. Maybe this is just my pansexual feminized male talking here, BUT I love to cry if it's for a good thing. Like a good movie with a powerful emotional impact. Yeah, love to cry to those. It's like i know i'm human.

But hey, something I noticed in your video just now: you're rubbing your hands together! i know, I wouldn't have noticed or even cared prolly except that I'M doing that a lot these days too. :o

Seriously, I wonder if that's the EPRHA, cause I don't recall you doing that in your earlier vids.

Anyhow, good stuff.

"A leader is a dealer in hope." - Napoleon
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05-13-2015, 10:45 PM (This post was last modified: 05-13-2015 11:08 PM by Benjamin.)
Post: #14
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Thanks Sarge. Crying isn't generally something I want to do unless it's warranted. I have noticed recently i've been impacted more by movies/shows/whatever emotionally.. it's maybe like the 'wall' I was putting up was numbing me to it.. but interestingly it was also numbing me from joy and other postive emotions as i've been feeling more of too.

As long as it's not crying at dumb or inappropriate things all the time then maybe.

But this was definately a big emotional purge that was very unexpected.. but a powerful moment for me.

Quote:But hey, something I noticed in your video just now: you're rubbing your hands together! i know, I wouldn't have noticed or even cared prolly except that I'M doing that a lot these days too. :o

Seriously, I wonder if that's the EPRHA, cause I don't recall you doing that in your earlier vids.

Interesting, I didn't notice. The first thing that comes to mind is like the 'steepling' of the hands like i've read in bodylanguage book... like dominant people or bosses or whatever sitting there with a hand steeple.. interesting observation, I wonder if anyone else noticed it. Not sure what i'd attribute it to.

Oh yeah i'll ask anyone watching my videos.. i'm working on bulking and people are commenting i'm putting on more muscle but i'm paranoid i'm getting fatter, like maybe my face or stomach a bit.. any feedback on that? Maybe it's just my own paranoia. I'm gonna take some progress photos to compare.

The thing I hate is the flap of skin under my chin from losing alot of weight.. but I can't do much it seems. I guess the beard covered that atleast.
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05-13-2015, 11:13 PM
Post: #15
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Ok I compared photos I just took now compared to 3 and 5 months ago and I notice some difference, my stomach is actually slimmer and my arms are bigger, so I guess it's just my mind.

But the other unexpected thing is that there was.. something else.. that I can't put my finger on that I would attribute to AM6, it's like I look way more masculine and composed though they are just photos in the mirror.. in the earlier photo the first thing that pops out is I feel my face looks kind of 'childlike' and in todays photos much more like a man and masculine. It's strange but it is quite distinct!

I can't explain it any better than that.. but for me to notice it then it must be something since I wasn't noticing my own changes before and it was just you guys mentioning it.
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05-14-2015, 02:27 AM (This post was last modified: 05-14-2015 02:30 AM by SargeMaximus.)
Post: #16
RE: AM6 Second Coming
(05-13-2015 10:45 PM)Benjamin Wrote:  Thanks Sarge. Crying isn't generally something I want to do unless it's warranted. I have noticed recently i've been impacted more by movies/shows/whatever emotionally.. it's maybe like the 'wall' I was putting up was numbing me to it.. but interestingly it was also numbing me from joy and other postive emotions as i've been feeling more of too.

As long as it's not crying at dumb or inappropriate things all the time then maybe.

But this was definately a big emotional purge that was very unexpected.. but a powerful moment for me.

Yeah well crying is a powerful thing. Or rather, comes about from a powerful thing. It's like sexual attreaction, guys don't want to admit it, but if you CAN, you have that strength of character imo, and women will notice.

This isn't a technique, so don't go around women and start crying lol, but it DOES mean that if you have to, go for it. Some of the greatest men in history have cried at some time or another. Actors cry on screen ALL the time, and they're famous. Why? Because most people can't do that. If you're strong enough to be weak. Does that make sense?

I've heard that the weak dogs in the pack will never show their weakness, whereas the top dogs will. Why do you think that is?

Same with guys and people. Haven't you noticed how the "alpha" guys are always pretty emotional? Maybe not crying, but they are definitely emotional.

Anyhow, those are my observations/theory.

(05-13-2015 10:45 PM)Benjamin Wrote:  
Quote:But hey, something I noticed in your video just now: you're rubbing your hands together! i know, I wouldn't have noticed or even cared prolly except that I'M doing that a lot these days too. :o

Seriously, I wonder if that's the EPRHA, cause I don't recall you doing that in your earlier vids.

Interesting, I didn't notice. The first thing that comes to mind is like the 'steepling' of the hands like i've read in bodylanguage book... like dominant people or bosses or whatever sitting there with a hand steeple.. interesting observation, I wonder if anyone else noticed it. Not sure what i'd attribute it to.

Oh yeah i'll ask anyone watching my videos.. i'm working on bulking and people are commenting i'm putting on more muscle but i'm paranoid i'm getting fatter, like maybe my face or stomach a bit.. any feedback on that? Maybe it's just my own paranoia. I'm gonna take some progress photos to compare.

The thing I hate is the flap of skin under my chin from losing alot of weight.. but I can't do much it seems. I guess the beard covered that atleast.

Steepling, I do that a lot too, but I've always done that. I thought more like a preperation kind of motion. and "ohhh, excellent" kind of gesture lol.

Haven't noticed your weight. Don't be one of those guys at the gym who's huge but thinks they're still skinny/fat/whatever lol. again, doesn't matter so much. Guys like Johnny soporno who dates porn stars in open relationships and has tons of em on the go is a small, bald, fattish guy.

And then those guys I saw in the store are skinny so yeah. Doesn't matter so much. It's what's inside that counts imo.

"A leader is a dealer in hope." - Napoleon
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05-14-2015, 03:35 AM (This post was last modified: 05-14-2015 03:51 AM by Benjamin.)
Post: #17
RE: AM6 Second Coming
Yeah I think it's just got to be appropriate.. none of that 'sensetive new age guy' kind of stuff where you're always vulnerable and talking about your feelings to them, but yes when it's appropriate.

Quote:Steepling, I do that a lot too, but I've always done that. I thought more like a preperation kind of motion. and "ohhh, excellent" kind of gesture lol.

Hmm ok, i'm not really sure.. i'll see if others comment.

Quote:Haven't noticed your weight. Don't be one of those guys at the gym who's huge but thinks they're still skinny/fat/whatever lol

Cool, i'm glad.. it must just be something being triggered. Funnily enough I did measurements after that and my stomach is smaller, plus my stomach smaller in the photos.

Yeah i've noticed it's still my self image adjusting.. but it's getting better definately. Sometimes it depends on the day, I can range anything from thinking i'm fat, thinking i'm muscular that day, then thinking i'm too small and skinny with no muscle haha. But i'm working on my mind at the same time, AM6 is a great example of that.. building self esteem, confidence etc at the same time.

I don't agree fully it's on the inside that counts, if someones obese but fully comfortable (which I can guarantee they are not) then they aren't going to be attractive, I think it's more like a threshold.. i'm definately past that threshold in the quality of my body and i'm mainly building it for myself now and the fact that I love weights and how it makes me feel.. but now it's allowing my self image and confidence and such to catch up. Which it is getting there. Wink

The raw primal feeling of lifting I ***** love.. the challenge.. the power I feel in my body when doing a big lift.. it's all ***** awesome. I am noticing i'm connecting even more with that. (AM6 masculinity programming maybe)
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05-14-2015, 03:41 AM (This post was last modified: 05-14-2015 03:45 AM by Benjamin.)
Post: #18
RE: AM6 Second Coming
I just got home from toastmasters (public speaking club). I hadn't gone for 2 months, I stopped when I was really down and I wanted to go back.

It showed me a distinct improvement in my confidence. I was fully confident up there speaking and as far as I can tell zero fear.. just confidence and going for it. I had to do the 'warm up' come up with a topic for everyone to speak on and relate it by telling a story first or however I decide to do it. I had like 2 minutes to come up with it and I did it confidently and convincingly.. I KNEW that I could do it and it flowed.

Lets compare say a few months ago, on the supper break for example. Usually I would just chat to 1 person quietly, listen to everyone else.. not really say much and would be uncomfortable.

Tonight I basically took over the ***** room... I was confidently telling stories, relating it to other people, including them into it... getting a completely different reaction and treatment from everybody the whole time. When I walked in they were genuinely happy to see me again.

I loudly told my story, had the group listening and focused. Usually I can do this in the meeting part because it's known that they have to focus on you and there's no pressure, but socially.. say in the supper break I just wouldn't.

Tonight I did... BIG difference.

I admit there is some fear of "what if this goes away.. what if it's temporary". But **** it..

What if instead it builds further?, What if this confidence becomes a deeper part of me? What if it only gets better?

Cool

The other thing I can report having toastmasters in mind that I can now relate back to my video.. I notice i'm using less 'filler'.. words.. just those things that communicate uncertainty 'you know' etc.

In it's place i'm using.... more... pauses... and communicating much more certainty.
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05-14-2015, 04:47 AM
Post: #19
RE: AM6 Second Coming
(05-13-2015 10:45 PM)Benjamin Wrote:  Oh yeah i'll ask anyone watching my videos.. i'm working on bulking and people are commenting i'm putting on more muscle but i'm paranoid i'm getting fatter, like maybe my face or stomach a bit.. any feedback on that? Maybe it's just my own paranoia. I'm gonna take some progress photos to compare.

The thing I hate is the flap of skin under my chin from losing alot of weight.. but I can't do much it seems. I guess the beard covered that atleast.

Buy one of these

Good investment IMO, its good biofeedback of your own progress bodybuilding. Results kinda change with your hidration levels so is best to measure first thing in the morning with nothing in your stomach for best and more accurate results.
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05-14-2015, 05:24 AM
Post: #20
RE: AM6 Second Coming
(05-14-2015 03:35 AM)Benjamin Wrote:  I don't agree fully it's on the inside that counts, if someones obese but fully comfortable (which I can guarantee they are not) then they aren't going to be attractive, I think it's more like a threshold.. i'm definately past that threshold in the quality of my body and i'm mainly building it for myself now and the fact that I love weights and how it makes me feel.. but now it's allowing my self image and confidence and such to catch up. Which it is getting there. Wink

Well I can't speak to obese. All I can say is that the skinny guys I saw with hot chicks were skinnier than me. Made me think.

"A leader is a dealer in hope." - Napoleon
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