The reason I choose this sub because it deals with multiple emotional and psychological problem as compared to other sub like "OF"&"OFSG".
I know these subs are much more focused on a particular area which makes them more powerful.
But the thing is that I am such a emotional mess that I can't seem to put my finger what the hell is causing all these problem and I have reached my limit. I can't solve this on my own and if I do idk how much time its gonna take.
9 months ago I was diagnosed with depression and at the same time I got "LTU". I started listening to LTU at same time I started my medication by day 20 I was somewhat becoming normal. I thought it was the meds so I thought I didn't need LTU so I stopped listening to it, but then after a few day things went down and I was back to square one again. Doc changed my med but nothing happened. I stopped going to him and left my ADs and I was having Brain Zaps for like 3 months.
While I was listening to LTU I was somehow able to easily focus on my studies and everything made sense. I thought it was the med but I am sure it was LTU.
There were many things I experienced during those 20 days but that's all I can remember.
I plan to listen to this sub for 200 days. I must do this . These 6 months will decide where my life will take me
Day 1
Well today I talked to my mom for a while.It was a funny conversation. Then she started cleaning her store which was a mess for like 2 years. I helped, which seem very odd now that I think because I always run from stuff like this. Also made her some tea. Meanwhile my younger bro Idk how to say but seem to behaving like a kid. He keeps poking me when I am relaxing which annoys me.. and whenever I ask him what's wrong with u ? His facial expression is something like "I have No idea why I am doing this". I guess my aura is affecting everyone. Specially my mom. Also my little sis poked me 2-3 time. What's with the poking?..lol.
My Appetite was good. I ate like a beast. I think it's because 5G is kinda demanding so it wants more brainpower. I feel some kinda stress,pressure on my brain, mostly in frontal lobe.I took shower 3 times. But it didn't help.
Now this might sound kinda nasty but I have been suffering from nasal polyp since 2012 and I have tried everything from Pharma stuff to herbal and homeopathy. They did provide relief but it was like 10 % and even that came after months of regular visits to doc.
I clearly remember the last time I played LTU my polyp was reduced by 40% only in 20 days. I never played LTU after that. Thought it was cause of my home remedies stuff. But after stopping LTU polyps came back and won't leave. Now since I have been playing LTU since yesterday and I am coughing out chunks of craps which were in my sinuses. I felt some itching also which only happens when there is some kind of healing going on.I have came to realize that this polyp of mine is some kind of energy block. Its weird that my polyp came along with depression. I have also noticed that whenever I am in a very good mood or high (by accident ofc) my sinuses will start cleaning up.So I guess my sinuses are also in need of LTU.
I guess there is a bit of MHS 5G in LTU..
That's all for today lets see what happens tomorrow.
Day 2
Well it seems that when I am listening LTU. Time seems to fly.
So I woke up, had some tea. Found out my cat was about to give birth to kittens.
While all this was happening I was browsing pages on fb and download some philosophical quotes and was also watching videos about new gadgets and stuff from Futurism. I downloaded some of them and sent them to everyone on whatsapp. Also a psychic called and warned my mom that someone is doing voodoo magic on me(I know its hokus pokus stuff but bare with me).It didnt bother me cause I already prepared myself in advance for these kind attacks and situations,be it (Demon,Negative energies or emotional detox, resistance etc).
Few moments ago I saw Hot pic of a random girl in google images section while I was browsing for stuff. I felt a sudden sexual urge. But it wasnt only physical attraction but I also wanted an emotional one.
Feeling somewhat mentally tired but not that much.
(10-15-2016, 09:13 AM)zainuu163 Wrote: [ -> ]Day 2
Well it seems that when I am listening LTU. Time seems to fly.
So I woke up, had some tea. Found out my cat was about to give birth to kittens.
While all this was happening I was browsing pages on fb and download some philosophical quotes and was also watching videos about new gadgets and stuff from Futurism. I downloaded some of them and sent them to everyone on whatsapp. Also a psychic called and warned my mom that someone is doing voodoo magic on me(I know its hokus pokus stuff but bare with me).It didnt bother me cause I already prepared myself in advance for these kind attacks and situations,be it (Demon,Negative energies or emotional detox, resistance etc).
Few moments ago I saw Hot pic of a random girl in google images section while I was browsing for stuff. I felt a sudden sexual urge. But it wasnt only physical attraction but I also wanted an emotional one.
Feeling somewhat mentally tired but not that much.
Congrats on your experience with LTU. You may not get any sleep with the delivery of new Kittens. If feeling down emotionally, you may want to get outside and get some Sunshine; Ocean air is therapeutic. Keep us informed about your LTU subliminal experiences. :angel:
Day 10
Seriously I dont know how to say this but...
There is this one fucking bastard I hate so much. I swear if it wasnt for my niece I would have killed him last night..This Guy owns a jewellery shop small one which was started by his father and I swear this guy has done nothing productive in last 45 years...He is just a fucking arrogant consumer and a MAN-BOY..
This guy has PIED. He fucking cant even satisfy his wife. She is a good looking woman and all this fucking bastard does is watch some "weird japanese porn" in which girls have three TITS..
Seriously I dont even wanna Google if there are girls with "THREE TITS". HE is sick. ...Why doesnt he FUCK a cow they have "Four TITS"...This guy doesnt even know incognito feature on Chrome. Whenever I open his Chrome browser all I see is " THREE TITS GIRLS". Its like his homepage and when ask him WTF is this ,his reply" My sister is a porn addict". Shame on him. He hides his addiction,wont admit it and in the end blames on his 18 years old sister..FUCK HIM.
HE is a fucking consumer. My whole family hates him. He has a 7 year old son and all he feeds him is this crap junk food and he doesn't even teach him any manners..
Also he recently had a really big loss in his jewellery business and yet it has no effect on him...
His wife(my cousin) crys in front of my mom everytime cause this fucking MANBOY cant satisfy her. Which makes her feel that she isnt beautiful and good enough..
He smells weird, wears weird, walks weird, talks weird...I just wanna puke on him. He usually comes and sleeps in my room cause my room is clean and tidy. Idk what kind of body odour this guy has but when he is gone my pillows and bedsheets smell like shit...SMELLS LIKE CORPSES of DEAD SPERM. As if he was fapping all night and then just slept in his own mess...Man I tell u my CAT is 1000% much better than him.
I hope this is just a phase from LTU...FUCK HIM.
Update: Just had a debate with him and I won. Won't bother me ever again.
Day 13
I am feeling so impulsive and making irrational decisions.
But as soon as the impulsiveness goes away I undo all the stuff I did..Its really strange that yesterday I was feeling so calm and peaceful. But today it's just the opposite. Also my sinuses wrnt bothering me. But today they are and my throat is also kinda itchy . Also I am having stomach pain and it won't go away no matter what I do and it's 3 am already. I think I am going thru some kind of "Physical Resistance".
Anyway I never expected this" LTU" journey to be easy. I mean I have all these negative and unwanted beliefs for past 20 years. So I can't expect to be that easy. There will be ups and downs in this journey. Which is a proof that it's working.. CAUSE I Resistance always comes up when u are busy improving urself
Update: Day 13
My mom said something about my younger brother. That how motivated he is to achieve his goals and how successful he is. Just hearing about this made me feel very sad. I was once like him 9 years ago. Full of dreams. But things happened and here I am sitting at home doing nothing. People think that I am like this because I love being lazy. No!! I don't want to be like this. It's just that I am "psychologically paralysed". I want to do things but I cant. Feels like crying but I can't....
Logically I knows its gonna get better,but sometimes u have to forget all that.. so that u can experience your emotions without any judgments.
Self Note:
Removed: Amethyst,Rose Quartz.
Wore: Green Fluorite, White Tiger(Sulaimani) Feeling High
Day 16
Well for past two days I don't know what has gotten into me.. I have been reading about Stock Marketing like crazy.. I seriously don't even remember how it all started. I have been watching stocks doing their ups and downs for past two days..
I spent about 16 hours just reading articles about it and trying to understand how it works. I know it's not that easy but... Idk what's happening.. Its like a game... You can play for life. A dangerous game.... Btw don't worry I haven't invested any money into it..
Seriously I have no idea what's going on...
Update: I seriously dont know why I am into this stock stuff.I don't even know the basics yet. I guess its some kind of phase from LTU.
Lets see where all this takes me..This never happened before.
I must be out of my mind.
Zane, When I read your LTU journal and compare it to other LTU journals...
I think of the answer Shannon gave to this question:
"How similar would two people who have done the exact same programs be?"
http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-8065-p...#pid136645
(10-11-2016, 11:41 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]How similar would two colors be if you added two of the same other colors to them?
Depends on which colors they were when you started adding colors, and what colors you add.
Except, with a person, you have potentials being expressed ether as positive or negative poles, which is either learned or by choice.
The subconscious isn't even something we can clearly define yet without argument. Neither is "personality".
Chart placements don't change the personality, they map the personality and it's potentials for expression.
Day 20
Past few days my sleep timing is kinda messed up.
I really don't know how to describe the emotional changes I am going thru. It's getting better slowly and surely. Also I am noticing that I sometimes have dreams which represents "fear" but I can't seem to remember it.
I am also noticing that I am getting somewhat emotionally stable. I can rationalize in that moment. But I'd if it's the sleep cycle or what.. I find nights more comfortable than daytime. I will sleep at 6 am and will wake up at 10 am. Then again I will sleep at 2 pm and will wake up at 6 pm... And I will be awake all night. Maybe the sub it also working like ADs. I was on them for 7 months and they did the exact same thing. But the sub is doing much better job. Also Time seems to go slow..
Life is getting better... Or Maybe I am learning to survive in this "Hell"..
Day 29
Had a argument with my brother. I started it..But he crossed the line. He has a military type physique. So he pushed me once while we were having an argument. Although he used some abusive languages..
While all this was going on I was just watching him like an observer and I really could see how out of control he was. He wasn't listening to my mom nor my sis, bro... He was just shouting... Calling me lazy and unproductive, useless and a burden on parents..
I didnt feel when he was saying those when we were having an argument but now when I think it kinda hurts a little. What he said was true. I am lazy, unproductive and a burden on my parents.. I have always known it. I won't deny it. I accept it...
I wont bother to talk to him anymore..
Well I guess I don't feel like typing... Overall everythings okay... Life's getting better. I am growing emotionally..
I went to doctor yesterday for my Nasal issues... Gave me meds feeling better..
Note : Fluorite