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Athena's Attracting Perfect Boyfriend Journal
06-04-2016, 05:36 PM
Post: #61
RE: Athena's Attracting Perfect Boyfriend Journal
(06-04-2016 12:20 AM)Athena Wrote:  
Inner Changes I've seen:


Rising Warrior you've asked what sort of inner changes I've seen, I've thought about it and looked through this journal and these are the things:

Less attachment to getting a boyfriend. I still REALLY REALLY want one but I'm not - it's more things like, if something goes wrong I've gutted but I'm bouncing back a bit quicker I think. And I used to feel down about not being in a romantic relationship and sad about it a lot more. Sometimes I still no but nowhere near what I used to. Sometimes I even feel more hopeful now. Part of that is due to the outer changes that happened & getting back out there after a year off. But this sub has also helped.

Patterns: Being more aware that actually I've self-sabotaged with several guys in my life (at least) & realizing that there are some blocks there. I think it's when I think a guy is too good for me, it's a bit like what Shannon said but for me it's like "Oh, he's going to reject me, so I'll just reject him first, maybe that will hurt less." But it's been WAAAAY more subtle than that and come out as me saying things that put them off me, things that make it sound like i don't even like them. But just being more aware of the patterns there from before.

Improve & ideas - I had a few ideas of what to put on my profile or things to work on.

Self-love - Just a stronger urge to work on that and find ways to increase that NOT in a narcissistic way! - but in a healthy balanced way of course that includes a healthy respect for others too.

Dreams - this is more an outer life thing but it's also the inner world. I had a dream I was changing my facebook status to "in a relationship" and I've had sex dreams too, I think. I might have had dreams when I just kissed but I forget now.

(Erm, yes, it could also be my body protesting the not having sex thing! Ahem, moving on from that point!)

Less jealousy & insecurity.
Just in the sense that it used to be if I saw a guy I liked in a photo with a girl, I'd feel threatened, I'd think he was with her and so on. I mean like one example is when my ex boyfriend changed his profile photo to one of him next to a girl, in a pub together, quite close together looking cozy. It wasn't till I said to his best friend about (ex's) new girlfriend and bestie laughed and said, "She's just a friend and she doesn't even live in this country!" But compare THAT to
me seeing photos of my online crush with two other girls AND seeing girls flirt on his instagram with him and me NOT feeling the usual jealousy, insecurity, threatened, not feeling like wow I've got competition - I mean, yes I DO but not feeling automatically like "What's the point, he's going to choose one of THEM, he'd NEVER pick me."
This is what I have sometimes been like. I've felt like no use competing, she's better than me, let her have him.

This time I feel like, OK, so other girls fancy him, they have great taste. He could still pick ME, and if he doesn't it's OK. Someone great will. And oh she's probably just a friend - - - without being naive about it, I must ad!!

So those are the changes I've noticed on the inside. [/align][/u]

I Like the 'Inner Changes' testimony about " Less Jealously and Less Insecurity." Both Men and Women; no matter who they are, have these in common Smile

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Athena
06-05-2016, 01:36 AM (This post was last modified: 06-05-2016 01:38 AM by Mr. Anderson.)
Post: #62
RE: Athena's Attracting Perfect Boyfriend Journal
(06-04-2016 03:59 PM)Athena Wrote:  Thanks Mr Anderson for explaining about those file types
to me & so quickly I appreciate that!

I have an iPhone & also a pretty basic
PC laptop. It wouldn't open that fold on PC could try on
iPhone. I used an app called files to download to phone
after trying to get it from EDownloader to Downloader.
Cos I like to listen to it on my iPhone at night. And the
silent one on the PC. I'm at the point where it's easier to
fall asleep listening to a sub.
Hopefully this will be the same just have Ocean on it but
will try & add trickling stream at some stage.

Thanks again! ?

Well, as iPhones can't play FLAC it wouldn't even help to download these files. But I figured out a way to listen to FLAC on iPhone. There is a cloud service called "Style Jukebox". You can upload the FLAC files you want to use and using the iPhone app to play them. Just make sure you set your audio quality in the settings to "HiFi" (There are two such settings). This will make sure the original file is used and no compression is added. But there are also another audio apps to play FLAC, but I don't know how they name.

When it comes to your PC then try to download VLC Player. Many people use also Audacious or Audacity (which is an audio editor, but you can listen the files anyway). I am using foobar by myself. HERE is a thread where player are discussed.
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Athena
06-05-2016, 12:53 PM (This post was last modified: 06-05-2016 12:54 PM by Athena.)
Post: #63
RE: Athena's Attracting Perfect Boyfriend Journal
Thank you so very much, Mr Anderson! I appreciate your reply and the promptness and thoroughness of it. I will check these things out.
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08-01-2016, 12:44 PM (This post was last modified: 08-01-2016 12:49 PM by Athena.)
Post: #64
RE: Athena's Attracting Perfect Boyfriend Journal
Like I said, I've taken a break from this sub and I'm still doing the EHPR2 sub.
Especially during my summer break as that's a time my moods and thoughts tend to go AWOL (with the extra time, no distraction of work).

But if and when I DO return to a love-life sub, it might be this or it might even be
Attract your perfect American romantic lover.

I mean, I sometimes get on SO well with American guys, I was thinking about that sub again about 2-3 days ago when I was chatting on skype with this guy from New York about hypnosis and NLP & stuff but also we just got on SO well and that seems to be par for the course with me & American guys OBVIOUSLY not all Americans are the same and some are huge players. But I also briefly dated a New Yorker, actually (in 2014) and well I enjoyed it! And I got on really well with him too.

I still haven't made up my mind about the sex thing heh heh.
I have an ex lover who, I may have mentioned this, I forget, he and I right-swiped each other on Tinder and we've been in touch since. But so far things keep coming up and we haven't met. He really REALLY wants to have sex with me (although on some level he MUSTN'T want that - probably both of us are putting up barriers?
And I'm like, well let's meet and see what happens, I don't think we've seen each other for maybe two years, who knows if there will still be attraction etc. What will happen if we do, I don't know. He IS someone I've already had sex with in the past anyway. I DID have sex with him early on erm but on the OTHER hand, he HAS even proposed to me twice in the past and said he wants to have a baby with me (and more recently he's said if it wasn't for me not wanting to have kids, he WOULD be my boyfriend - and yes on Tinder of all places he's more or less said he wants a relationship leading to more. So, in THAT case at least MAYBE it WASN'T sex too soon that was the issue? No idea :-) But at the moment it's only sometimes calls and texts between us. It's nice to have that though. But that's what my love & sex life have dwindled down to! Oh well!

But also, I think the sub HAS been helpful in some ways, as I've said about, and also I definitely definitely needed to switch to EHPR2 for a little while first and lay the foundation. Pun not intended! (Sorry, couldn't resist ;-) )


Apart from THAT
my phone has been SO glitchy so Tinder doesn't work, kik doesn't work - and bluestacks etc. sound dodgy - and I tried Plenty of Fish again but this time a different way, hiding my profile and only contacting guys I felt attracted to.
And it was a DISASTER.
I contacted 30 guys and 4 replied - no, 5, I think? 4 were interested and 1 of those was married. And also, later on they all disappeared from the site!

So I am actually going through a man-drought, but it's ok.

I just hope it doesn't last TOO long!
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