~Stand tall and shake the heavens~

[enoch]

hey everyone!

I now start a journal on my way to be the best man I can be!

I really really enjoyed reading other people's progress and it keeps me motivated as well. I've been using Aura of Sexiness for 6 days now. I noticed a lot of positive changes that happened since then.

The first day of waking up after a night of listening to Aura of Sexiness I was completely hyper, I usually ponder on my thoughts for quite a while until I notice it most of which are negative. But it felt really strange that I wouldn't let myself think of anything negative that would make me feel bad. If I tried, the thought would vanish immediately. I am really lazy when it comes to working out, I usually skip for weeks but somehow I felt that I just had to do it everyday. I also look in the mirror often now.

A lot of stuff for day 1. Day 2 until now seemed slower but I noticed that I don't take conversations from my siblings whether it turned good or bad, personally. If I had a bad conversation or encounter, I just let it go and talk to them normal again after a couple of hours as if nothing happened. I usually grieve and sulk for days lol. I guess I became more forgiving to them and to myself.

I'm currently listening to Aura of Sexiness during the day and Grow Taller Sub 3G during the night (I started this two nights before ago). I try to have at least 8 hours each. I actually have a question to Shannon, is this ok to mix?

I usually listen to the ocean waves version using my phone with headphones but tonight I'm listening to the silent one. I did listen to ocean waves with comfortable volume, switched to the silent and dialed the volume down two notch. My headphone range says 10hz - 22,000hz I guess it's good, but my inner ear feels a little bit of pressure and discomfort after a while from the silent version. I'm not sure if I'm doing it correctly, how do I confirm?

I also do MM written affirmations/gratitude at night before sleep and mirror affirmations when I wake up.

Thanks Shannon! Good night every one ::

[enoch]

Day 15 of AoS:

Today I wake up and felt motivated again to do everything I can to be the best man I can be! The past two weeks of AoS sub have had my mood swinging up and down, it was crazy. I felt like I was at war with myself.

One consistent thing happening to me is that I constantly think of improving myself. I look in the mirror A LOT more than I used to and imagine what I want to see. I feel that I HAVE TO get up my ass and workout or I would feel bad. I've taken martial arts, one thing I've always wanted to get into. There's a lot of discipline in this area and this is exactly what I need right now in order to achieve what I want.

I also stopped smoking since I started AoS, I'm still tempted but now I think about the feeling I get after smoking and it would only get in the way of my goal.

I'm thinking about doing Absolute Self Confidence next and then Alpha Male. I want to become more independent. Get a ton of self respect, confidence, friends and more women in my life. Show me the way.

[enoch]

Twenty days into the sub and I have been in a pool of negativity lately. Whenever I am awake and put on my headphones to listen to AoS sub a lot of negative thoughts come up. Mostly about jealousy, envy, loneliness and neediness. I caught myself off guard yesterday having these thoughts linger I also think that it is a self fulfilling prophecy because I'm thinking too much about it then I feel worse. I'm infatuated with this girl and the thought of losing her to somebody drives me crazy.

I'm wondering, is this some kind of resistance from my subconscious to bring me down? or is it just releasing all these negativity within me. I guess I'm confused as well

[Spiral]

Hey man hang in there. If you are pursueing this girl and have yet to begin a meaningful physical relationship with her.. then you are digging yourself into a deep hole of jealousy and agony. You need to quit doing that man and know that women are abundant and this one girl you are infatuated with probably isn't even what you truly want. From what I can tell you have alot to work on in regarding neediness so those thoughts will come up. I highly recommend you get the Alpha Male set and run through that. You'll thank Shannon and I later for suggesting it to you. Take care of that bitch behavior man and know you are better than that. All you need is you because that's all you got in the end anyways. You are tool cool to envy or be jealous of anyone man! Get with it enoch

[Ryan]

enoch, I went through all of the jealousy and insecure issues too man. But Spiral is right, focus on an abundance and yourself rather than living for women. That's your first step. And yeah, Alpha Male will change your life completely. So will Sex Magnet Invest in yourself if that's what you want.

Ryan

[enoch]

Thanks guys. This has been a cycle all my life that I get infatuated and end up with myself only to blame. But I'm longing for a change and break this cycle.

I'd like to ask you guys a question, I'm 2 weeks away from the 32 days minimum running of Aura of Sexiness sub. I plan on going for Absolute Self Confidence 4g then Alpha Male 2011 but would you guys suggest I start AM2011 next instead? My confidence is ant hill but if I can get that from Alpha Male set as well...


~Day 21~
I just love it when my mood swings from negative to positive, with yourself consciously forcing it to and succeed.

I woke this morning feeling all lazy to get up and do exercise. Its starting to chill here in Florida. I tried to stay asleep but my conscious mind began thinking and won't stop. What's worse is that the thoughts that comes up are all negative. I always try to battle this by remembering Cory Skyy teachings: on waking up imagine something good that has happened in the past or something that you want in the future that makes you happy, smile and put a smirk in your face. I did just that and went out to jog, stretch and crunches/push ups.

I felt better but then I had to force a conversation with my sister which ended in disaster. I was left home alone getting ready for school then work but I noticed that I feel so terrible. This time I willfully tried to pull myself together. Ever since I started Aura of Sexiness, I feel like I owe it to myself to feel good all the time. Its like there is some kind of 'guardian' in my head that suggests things like go workout, look in the mirror and see that sexy man. I went up to my bathroom, stared at my left eye and performed mirror affirmations then did the same to the right eye.

I was feeling better already. Driving to work I have my AoS sub playing, my brain keeps popping up negative thoughts about the girl I'm infatuated with then feelings of envy and jealousy kicks in. What's different this time is that I consciously get rid of the thought and clear my mind. Another one pops out I try to snap my fingers or wave my hand to signal myself to clear the mind. This stuff continued on while working, I was still listening to AoS sub through headphones. I felt really tired the whole day.
I headed to my martial arts academy after work, I left early for it. I do this whenever I feel tired, stressed out or breaking down emotionally and most of the time it cures...

...and it did.

I had a wonderful class today. I felt different when I did the exercises. I was more confident and I can quickly grasp and understand what to do for the most part. What made it better is I got the pretty girl as my sparring partner for 1/3 of my time there. She was kind of scared to get hit by me because I'm a beginner and have little to no control of my movements. But we did great. I went in really tired and stressed out, came out happy and smiling.

Home was not that chaotic as usual. I stopped by mickeyD's and bought some food for me and my siblings. The cashier lady and I had a pretty good amount of eye contact without saying anything. I felt some kind of energy of some sort while we're doing it for that brief amount of time. She gave me this wide smile when I left the window. I'm starting to get a feeling for eye contact. I've had a habit of looking down most of the time or looking around while conversing. Moving on, I resisted the urge to confront my sister and just let it go. I know where it leads to, and I chose to stay happy. I can say I gained a little self love and respect for that.

[Ryan]

Alpha Male is going to give you insane confidence. I'd say use ASC.with it

Ryan

[ncbeareatingman]

Thanx fer the Tip Ryan,I'll be shure to try that out(ASC with ALpha) when I begin the Alpha Male training set 2012,next spring.NcBear.

[woceyes]

enoch, i would say use Alpha next if your worried about your confidence. Do like Ryan said and use ASC.with it. I love Aura of Sexiness how do you like it so far in general?

[ncbeareatingman]

its MY choice wocyces,I'll do it My way. NcBear.

[woceyes]

(12-01-2011 04:56 PM)ncbeareatingman Wrote:  its MY choice wocyces,I'll do it My way. NcBear.

didn't realize i was responding to you...

[enoch]

(12-01-2011 06:29 AM)woceyes Wrote:  enoch, i would say use Alpha next if your worried about your confidence. Do like Ryan said and use ASC.with it. I love Aura of Sexiness how do you like it so far in general?

I love it. It has completely changed the way I perceive myself whenever I pass by a mirror. Prior to AoS, I am rarely satisfied with how I look or most of the time I'm dissapointed but I don't do anything about it. Now, everytime I look at my face I look awesome. My body is still catching up, I am extremely skinny but after listening to AoS and joining martial arts I'm starting to see some improvements but not quite there yet. I'm doing what needs to be done to be 'sexy' I suppose. It's giving me results slowly but I think it's because I had a LOT of things to work on to begin with.

Eye contact is really interesting to me. Before I consciously keep eye contact, I had a bad habit of looking around and looking downwards so when I speak to a woman I'm inclined to look at their boobs even though I did not mean to then I start to worry about what they might think. NOT GOOD. When I look at their eyes its different. I don't have to think or worry about anything. I'm just looking at their eyes and observing them pretty eyes. It doesn't happen most of the time, some people don't even look at you when they speak. It's weird that I am actually noticing that now.

I might have to give AoS a longer run than the recommended 32 days to see the full effect of it.

(12-01-2011 05:40 AM)Ryan Wrote:  Alpha Male is going to give you insane confidence. I'd say use ASC.with it

Ryan

Thank you guys. Today, I started Alpha Male 2011 (note to self: December 4th, 2011)

I have been listening since 3am using the stream version and switched to Ocean surf when I woke up. This is quite different, the usual 'voices' I hear from AoS' ocean surf track is very subtle in AM2011 ocean surf and almost non-existent in the stream version.

It's early to say any changes but I have this excitement since last night. I will be listening to AM2011 during night time and AoS on day time, then replace AoS with ASC.in 2 weeks time.

I went out last night to my first club by myself. Normally I would cringe to just the thought of it, but somehow I just had the fear of the 'unknown' last night. And also the way I walk has improved around people. I usually walk with my head down looking at the ground and twisting my body to fit tight walk space between people. Last night I just walked like there's nobody there. I have my chin up, gazing over peoples faces see some pretty women's faces. I just didn't have the guts to talk to anybody.

[Shannon]

Enoch, on one-volume programs, 32 days is the minimum required time to use it. On multi-stage programs, it is usually the limit per stage, as with AM. In the case of AM, each stage needs to be used at a specific length of time to balance out the others, and the 32 days is a rigid requirement. Single stage programs need at least 32 days of use. So AoS can be used for as long as you like as a single stage program.

[enoch]

Thank you Shannon, I will continue Aura of Sexiness for a couple of days. Sometimes I get eye contact and smile from time to time whenever I pass by somebody in my work's hallways, mostly women in the building. It feels invigorating. I'm also reading John Alexander's How To Become An Alpha Male as you suggested in the instructions. I like this book, he points out beta male behaviors and I admit that I fit the description on most count. I've come to a halt with reading it as of today though, my internal issues are coming up and its making me feel unmotivated and lazy to go on with anything.

4th day of AM2011

I am pretty shaken up a few hours after waking up. I have too much jealousy and envy in me. I suddenly thought of the girl I love having sex with somebody close to me and my feelings just went downhill. I feel like I can't trust anybody. She might have or not, it's like a tennis match in my head but the last thing I want is get stuck in this state. I wonder how everybody else deals with this? Is it best to stay away from them? Somehow I feel like its running away. I'm basically confused or don't know what is the right thing to do right now.

The past few days listening to Alpha Male and reading John Alexander's book, I sort of start to sense when people are ordering me around especially at home. Occasionally I would make a come back and give an order in the manner they did and they would react to it and I just explain how it feels to be on the other end. Whenever I feel taken for granted I burst out with my emotions and sort of put it out there. Somehow I feel they don't like that and I'm sensing them distancing away from me whenever I'm around.

~

I really enjoy reading everybody's journal, it keeps me motivated and move forward. I can't wait for Alpha Male's conclusion and start Sex Magnet!

[Shannon]

Alpha definitely puts you in a no-bull**** zone. I am really pleased with how much I have changed in that regard from using it. I think you'll find yourself saying the same thing when you have finished it. Just remember, this is only the 4th day of 180. You have a long way to go, and a lot of change to experience. I'm glad you took my advice to read Alexander's book. It really helps explain things to your conscious mind.

[enoch]

10th Day of AM2011

It has been, and still is a roller coaster with my emotions. It's almost happening everyday. Everyday I wake up, I feel so down with jealousy and regret that I feel paranoid. My mind keeps thinking whether I should forget this girl or just slow down. If I choose to forget her and focus only on myself for now, my mind becomes concrete about it. I feel confident and see myself six months from now when I finish Alpha Male sub, I see a better self than what I am. But then a few hours later I realize I still want her and I try to brush off all this jealousy and neediness so I can be with her. Neediness has toned down, but it is still there. I can sense when I'm being needy but I submit to it.

I feel very tired everyday. But that can be attributed to my lack of sleep I think, I usually rest from midnight til 6am.

I'm starting to think about whether I'm on the right track with this sub or not, or if I'm doing the right thing and the right decision. One thing is clear though, I will complete this journey no matter what!

[Shannon]

(12-14-2011 03:58 AM)enoch Wrote:  10th Day of AM2011

It has been, and still is a roller coaster with my emotions. It's almost happening everyday. Everyday I wake up, I feel so down with jealousy and regret that I feel paranoid. My mind keeps thinking whether I should forget this girl or just slow down. If I choose to forget her and focus only on myself for now, my mind becomes concrete about it. I feel confident and see myself six months from now when I finish Alpha Male sub, I see a better self than what I am. But then a few hours later I realize I still want her and I try to brush off all this jealousy and neediness so I can be with her. Neediness has toned down, but it is still there. I can sense when I'm being needy but I submit to it.

I feel very tired everyday. But that can be attributed to my lack of sleep I think, I usually rest from midnight til 6am.

I'm starting to think about whether I'm on the right track with this sub or not, or if I'm doing the right thing and the right decision. One thing is clear though, I will complete this journey no matter what!

You're going to need more sleep with this program. It's using a LOT of energy. Also need more exposure than 6 hours for best results.

Understand that questioning whether or not you're on the right track is resistance, and resistance is your subconscious mind's way of trying to get you to stay where you are. It's called homeostasis, the natural desire of your system (body and mind) to maintain an equilibrium that it believes will keep you safe and healthy. In other words, the currently existing subconscious "program" is trying to prevent itself from being overwritten, and one common way that the subconscious will do this is to cause you (consciously) to question yourself, doubt yourself, want to stop, etc. That only means it's working, and that you need to keep going.

So yes, do finish the entire set. There's a lot more to accomplish.

[enoch]

@ZoRoEnriQue: thanks, I will try my best to shift focus to myself.

@Shannon: thanks for the reassurance, now I know what my subconscious is up to!

11th Day of AM2011 with Aura of Sexiness

Slept a little bit earlier but my sleep ended at 5am. I tried to get more but I ended up thinking with my eyes closed then I get stuck in it like a quagmire. The more I resist it the more I sink. I feel like its a routine waking up in the morning thinking about this girl and feeling down, but not as intense like yesterday.

I remember watching 'The Secret', about visualization to attract what you want to manifest. Whenever I feel an intense feeling of jealousy, I get thoughts about the girl seeing or having sex with somebody. It feels so horrible and the memory it leaves is almost vivid like it already happened. I think visualization is useful for my self improvement, but it also destroys me. I wonder Shannon, is there a sub to get me out of my head? Maybe I could use Disconnect From The Negativity Within or Positive Thinking & Positive Attitude sub with AM2011 to shift my thinking.

Aura of Sexiness is doing great, women are noticing my presence more. Some of them start to wave at me at my workplace whenever I pass by them. Almost every women I have eye contact with smiles. My eye contact needs calibrating though I think. I was pissed at my brother the other day, then I looked at him. He said "don't look at me like that, it's creepy". I looked away and left. A couple of hours later I was driving and he's on the passenger seat. We were talking then he said something to tease me, I suddenly remembered why I was pissed then I looked at him with a straight face. He said the way I look at him is like James Bond. I asked him, ' charismatic? ' he said no, like I was going to break his neck and he was scared. I like this eye contact business, it feels like I'm passing or communicating my energy (or my state of thinking) through the other person's eyes. I'm not sure how to do it right, but when I do mirror affirmations, I feel my left eye is more dominant than my right. I remember Cory Skky about mirror affirmations with the right eye. Is there a difference?

My martial arts class is doing good and I love it but I'm lacking self confidence. Sensei always comments on my shyness, and he would say 'believe in yourself' whenever I do the moves. We have an open sparring by the end of the class. Its free for all but one pair at a time in front & center of the room. I want to play but something is holding me back. I never ask anyone to spar, I just wait for anybody to come up at me and ask. Some are pretty girls that ask me to spar which is good! . Sensei notices this and told me "...don't let anyone push you. don't wait for anybody to ask you. just do it." I have difficulty controlling my body, thus executing proper technique fails. I'm afraid I'd hurt somebody with my clumsiness (even though the class' motto is if you get hit, it's your fault) which makes me an awkward partner, me thinking constantly (I really want to get out of my head and be in the moment) and my confidence level.

Can't wait for Alpha Male 2011 to flush all my subconscious garbage away. I want to enjoy my Martial Arts class more, enjoy and be satisfied with myself.

[Shannon]

DO use Disconnect From The Negativity Within.

DON'T use AOS until you're healed emotionally. You're just teasing and torturing yourself and perpetuating your misery.

[enoch]

21st Day of Alpha Male 2011 Stage 1

I'm beginning to get outside my comfort zone easier. A voice in my head used to say negative things that try to keep me in my comfort zone like you'll embarrass yourself, you have no appropriate clothes etc, but now It's like there's another one that pushes me out to change and go for what I want. Since starting AM2011, I've been going out when asked, I usually turn down most of them prior.

When around new people, I am so timid and shy before that I don't even try to join the conversation. Its like I listen and put the conversation in my head and join in it. I mean I'm still shy and hesitant but I do give out my opinion and curiosity about the subject now. I think about what they are thinking about me less and less since the start of this sub. If I do think about I distract myself and listen to the conversation again. I find confidence in little things like now I'm able to intervene or ask a sparring partner in my martial arts class, still shy and thinking too much but am slowlyy going for it.

I get agitated and furious when I don't get respected, but not in a violent way. I will sometimes confront them or just do something to calm me down.

It's weird that rarely, I want to burst out in tears. When I do and am alone, I just give in. It comes out of the blue, I'm happy one sec. then I want to weep after.

Neediness has gone down. When I notice it, I try to control myself and succeed.

Halfway in this stage, I had a major loss of motivation. I was reading John Alexander's book up till the affirmations and dressing part where I got bored and stopped reading. I didn't want to go to work either. I still listen to the sub and now my motivation is slowly coming back up. I think I can attribute that to reading other people's journal here it reminds me of what I want to achieve, where I want to go, thanks guys.

I read that Sex Magnet 2.0 features that Shannon posted on Ryan's journal, I drooled. I can't wait to try that!

Also, I dropped Aura of Sexiness since the post above. Thanks Shannon, It actually helped because rather than distract myself with these women giving me eye contact, instead I've dealth with my feelings for this girl. I spent a lot of time thinking about me and her. I look and think of her everyday but I'm starting to see that this girl isn't for me. The more I go out, the more I think that this girl is not what I want. It's just letting go of her that is hard. Whenver I think about it my mind goes to WHAT IFs. What if this works out and so on..

I've yet to use Disconnect From The Negativity Within sub, I will purchase it this week and start my new year journey with it. I'm feeling good things will happpen in my life in 2012.