Ben's Ideal Weight Custom! :)

[benjamin]

So with much frustration and thinking it over, since i've now got my custom Ideal Weight I am starting it tonight.

I started SM as I wasn't finding results from the original 1 stage ideal weight. But really I should have used another program, not a 6 stage one. Oh well i've learnt from that.

And I realized that I have been letting my emotions make these choices. So i've applied logic and some painful honesty.

What I wrote earlier -

Quote:Hmm.. thinking logically about what is best. I know in the short term I wanna do SM, but in the long term it's better for me to do ideal weight and then SM later on.

Because one thing that I haven't wanted to really accept or face is that due to my current weight i'm not fully able to enjoy sex or perform that well and alot of things I can't do now that I could when I was slimmer.

So thinking logically (even though my emotions will try to steer me away from this.) even if I had several girls that were exactly what I want that I could fuck, I wouldn't have the energy to do it that much. I used to be able to go like 3 times easily in a few hours. And a few times when I was in good shape 6+ times some nights. But now I struggle after the first time.

So being in better shape and slimmer would give me a much better base for SM. That's why initially I was doing the 3g ideal weight, and changed when it wasn't working.

By then SM 2.0 will be out and if i'm happy with the increased strength of a custom I will get a custom of that.

I am slightly going to mourn stopping SM though. But i'm only on Stage 2. If I was further I would probably continue.

The other thing is every night I am dropping myself into a hypnotic state (learnt from Igor Ledochowski) and visualizing how I want to look and doing another process using EFT Matrix Reimprinting which I credit to allowing me to have eaten well in the last 3-4 weeks consistently which I haven't been able to do in years. So doing ideal weight, it will all be lined up and not going in both directions.

This post is half me analyzing it myself to see what is better for me, that's why it's long.

So because of that, even though my 'wanting instant satisfication pattern' wants me to do SM, that logically in the long run achieving my ideal weight is much more important, not only for girls but for nearly everything in my life, including general confidence.

So at the moment I am around 135kg.

I took some photos tonight of myself to compare in the future. But i've realized that it's hard to compare photos over the shorter term due to taking them from a slightly different distance with my phone etc. So what i'm going to do is get my friend who did a personal training course to take my measurements and that will show me my improvements easier than the photos. But atleast I have a before photo.

So started Stage 1 - Thursday 12/1/12. Finish Stage 1 - Monday 13/2/12 and start Stage 2 on Tuesday 14/2/12.

Started Stage 2 - Tuesday 14/2/12. Finish Stage 2 Saturday 17/3/12. Start Stage 3 Sunday 18/3/12.

Started Stage 3 - Sunday 18/3/12 - Finish Stage 3 Thursday 19/4/12. Onto Stage 4 Friday 20/4/12.

Started Stage 4 - Saturday 21/4/12. Finish Stage 4 - Wednesday 23/5/12 onto Stage 5 - Thursday 24/5/12.

-Ben

[Shannon]

Whatever you do..., once you start this program, don't stop until you've finished the first run through. If you are still losing weight, run through it again. It may take multiple run throughs for some people to lose all the weight.

I look forward to seeing you post on this.

[K-Train]

Good luck Ben, I think you're doing the right thing. Losing weight will help eliminate that source of resistant whenever you do SM. It's always best to do the things you NEED to do, and then do the things you WANT to do.

[benjamin]

Quote:Whatever you do..., once you start this program, don't stop until you've finished the first run through. If you are still losing weight, run through it again. It may take multiple run throughs for some people to lose all the weight.

I look forward to seeing you post on this.

Yeah i'm more dedicated to this as it was my first choice over SM, but it just wasn't available at the time.

Thankyou for the custom Shannon. I hope that my journal gives something back as you see your work in action.

Of course my fears of putting back on weight (which I know will be covered here) are making me think "what, there will be a maintining program too?" (from the manual) and the fear of if I just do this and then another subliminal that I will put it back on.

But dealing with all these fears and subconscious reasons would have to help you maintain it from this set anyway wouldn't it?

Quote:Good luck Ben, I think you're doing the right thing. Losing weight will help eliminate that source of resistant whenever you do SM. It's always best to do the things you NEED to do, and then do the things you WANT to do.

Thanks, yeah as hard as it is sometimes to put aside what I 'want' and do what I need, I know this is the best option.

As for that source of resistance with SM, yeah definately and my dreams last night support that.

First I noticed I just couldn't sleep for hours, I was really restless. Like an excess of energy. Also I couldn't concentrate much on my visualization that I do when I goto bed, I usually put a subliminal on and then visualize and goto sleep. I didn't have this same problem of not being able to sleep or even visualize with the other subliminals, i'd say that is because of the name imbed making it more powerful.

The other thing is on Alpha and SM it took a week or 2 before I started having or noticing dreams related to the subliminal. But last night I had alot of them. They were all quite weird and I couldn't make sense of most of it. But when waking up I realized there was one theme that has to do with a deep fear I have of losing weight.

I thought I had dealt with this by letting of of the memory, but there is obviously still some left. The second girl I was ever with, I had something happen that ***** me up for ages, that also took ages to recover from. And that fear was coming up that I would attract those kinds of girls if I was in good shape. And thinking about it, after that happened I did start going to the gym less and put on some weight. I won't go into what happened. But since it is coming up, I know the subliminal will clear it eventually. Also in the dream there was a few people I know, but i'm not sure why.

Today I woke up really stuffed, the old hit by a truck kind of feeling and been a bit foggy since I got up. I didn't get this as strong either with SM. But it tells me something is happening.

I'm having trouble concentrating, but I think that's all I had to type for now.

-Ben

[benjamin]

So had problems sleeping again. I could feel it pounding into my head, again unlike the other subliminals. I didn't sleep much. I think I had some dreams, but I don't remember what they were.

I also woke up pretty stuffed again. But that is also due to sleeping less as I had to get up. And going to bed several hours earlier like I did may of had something to do with it too.

I also noticed that I am less hungry and ate way less today. I ate alot of fruit salad, and kind of felt sick, it was too much. Then went a few hours with a girl i'm seeing cos she needed to get a new bed. It broke, we were sitting only sitting on it too! No funny story there.

Anyway, got there, had a coffee, and just had some fruit a bit later that I brought with me and some walnuts. And I was okay with much less.

Right now I am slightly hungry, but it seems controllable. I also feel kind of light headed, half due to lack of sleep, but I reakon also due to less food than i'm used to.

When we went back to her house, had a shower after building her bed and alot of insecurity was coming up, about being fat and feeling that all the work i've done in the last month is useless and feeling like I only have got fatter.

But later on when putting my pants on, she said something about "you will need to buy new pants soon, they are nearly hanging off you." Which made me feel good. But resistance and insecurity is telling me not to believe it. As my pants don't feel that loose around the stomach.

Oh well, I can't yet attribute that to the subliminal, the results are due to what i've been doing the last month or so (exercising and primal blueprint) but I predict even much better results from this subliminal.

In a few weeks, she is going away for about 6 weeks with her mum. And I hope to surprise her alot when she comes back after not seeing me in that long and have her shocked at how much slimmer I am. I really have alot of doubt of it, but if I could do that I would feel awesome!

If wheatbellyjm is anything to go on. It seems realistic I could lose like 10kg in that time.

-Ben

[Shannon]

It will certainly be interesting to see how you do with this, given your level of fears. I have every confidence that you're going to see a significant change in yourself, and not just to your weight.

[benjamin]

Quote:It will certainly be interesting to see how you do with this, given your level of fears. I have every confidence that you're going to see a significant change in yourself, and not just to your weight.

Hopefully I do well as the weight has been very resistant to most of my efforts in this area in the last few years.

I also feel I will see a change in myself too. The last few days i've felt really confident. And getting along better with people. Tonight I hung out with a friend for hours and it seemed to go alot deeper than usual, I discovered we both had very similar challenges at school with our weight, but the strange thing is, he has similar problems because of being too skinny.

Also maybe because his brothers weren't there who i'm friends with too made him open up a bit more.

Another thing I realized, that alot of the fears I have of losing weight and being in good shape go into several other areas of my life. So dealing with them will help in many areas.

Anyway, I got my measurements done earlier.

15/1/12

Chest - 126.5cm

Left Arm - 46cm Right Arm - 47cm

Stomach (largest part) - 136cm

Left Thigh - 80cm Right Thigh - 80cm

Left Calve - 45cm Right Calve - 47cm

-Ben

[benjamin]

Another fear is coming up, that I didn't realize until i've started. I feel from exercising and eating better my testosterone is getting higher. Which makes me more aggressive and there is a fear I could get myself into trouble.

In most ways more testosterone is positive, more male energy, more horny, last longer, be stronger, being able to be more dominant and aggressive with girls in a good way, happier, more drive etc.

It's a shame I didn't realize this fear when I was giving you ideas when you did the program. But some of the other fears may cover this aswell as there is a few similar ones.

-Ben

[Shannon]

I don't think you will have anything to worry about it. All these fears are coming from a single core cause, and I made sure to have the problem deal with it.

[Patti]

Good luck with this program Ben! I’m a little confused though. I thought that WheatbellyJm is listening to the six stage weight program that Shannon hasn’t officially released yet and you are listening to the single stage name embedded weight program? Is that not true? I’m just curious because you mentioned his effects and I’m watching his experience for myself with that program. And I also don’t know if even because they are for the same thing in the long run, are they comparable?

Anyway, I wanted to suggest that maybe you put your results in the general users section, only because some people who might be looking for help with losing weight might not read the Mens over 18 section.

I’m excited to hear about your successes!

[benjamin]

Hi Patti.

Yeah i'm doing the 6 stage program. I ordered a custom of it, and I think I was the first to order it and Shannon is building the customs before the normal program is released. Mine was finished last week.

From what i'm already getting then the single stage and 6 stage isn't comparable at all. I have a feeling this one will be way more powerful. And the difference between single and 6 stage sets is alot.

Quote:Anyway, I wanted to suggest that maybe you put your results in the general users section, only because some people who might be looking for help with losing weight might not read the Mens over 18 section.

I do think that would be a good idea. Except that some of the stuff in here will be more explicit, like stuff relaxed to sex. So that is why most of my journals are here.

Quote:I’m excited to hear about your successes!

Thanks!

-Ben

[Shannon]

Patti, I have released three copies so far. One was to WheatbellyJM to verify one particular thing I was concerned about. He also resisted the previous version, and this one is working very well on him. One was to a friend of mine, Sarah, who just got diagnosed with diabetes because of her weight, so she needs to lose weight for her health in a very real way and I figured that was a pretty good reason to release it to her a little early. Sarah is actually the main reason this program even exists. And one is to Ben here, which is a custom.

The full version will be released very soon. Possibly even today.

[WheatBellyJM]

(01-16-2012 09:22 AM)Shannon Wrote:  Patti, I have released three copies so far. One was to WheatbellyJM to verify one particular thing I was concerned about. He also resisted the previous version, and this one is working very well on him. One was to a friend of mine, Sarah, who just got diagnosed with diabetes because of her weight, so she needs to lose weight for her health in a very real way and I figured that was a pretty good reason to release it to her a little early. Sarah is actually the main reason this program even exists. And one is to Ben here, which is a custom.

The full version will be released very soon. Possibly even today.

Yes, I'm using the one that will be available for all to buy soon. Just about to start stage 2. Excited

[benjamin]

So after a strong start, i'm getting some resistance.

Yesterday for some reason, my workout seemed really hard, harder than usual. And during it I realized it is probably resistance and said to myself "it's just resistance, that's ok, i'm going to keep going" or something. And I was able to get through it easier after realizing that.

There was also a thing with my parents, getting shitty that I wait to workout after my dad comes home, so I have to take the ute out and put it back in. I think it's an overreaction, but stuff like that has effected me in the past. Because it's better to workout at the time I feel like it instead of forcing it. So them doing that triggered something. It may just be the program causing that too, pointing out certain trigger points before they are let go.

I also made a funny discovery, a girl cooked me tea and I tried some skewers with mushroom, eggplant and a few other things. And I decided to try it. But she noticed that when I was going to taste it I would have my face screwed up in disgust and go in and take a little bite, and it was like I already made up my mind I didn't like it. Hmm, interesting, that strategy certainly doesn't work. I don't think I would have liked it anyway, but that is a habit to be aware of, and to work on approaching tasting new foods in a more positive way.

I'm also getting that resistance in the way of thinking "there's no point, this will never work." It was funny because I had another look at the manual last night and read exactly what I was thinking and how it means it's working and was like "oh yeah". Even though I know this, the resistance seems to make me forget it.

But at the same time as the resistance, the good thing that happened today is I really felt like going for a walk and I did, I went for 15 minutes which is a good start. I hope to do my mon/wed/fri kettlebells and walk on tue and thurs. But i'd just been thinking about it and not doing it until today.

-Ben

[benjamin]

So way more resistance today. Actually maybe not resistance. Frustration at where I currently am and not just about my weight.

Before I was really frustrated and just didn't want to sit at home, so I went for a drive by myself and thought alot. Drove through places I used to hang out and heaps of memories come back. And heaps of frustration about not going anywhere in life and wanting to do something different but not knowing what. I drove around for about 40 minutes and just got home, I feel a fair bit better now.

It's like I feel I can't fully experience life because of my weight but can't be fully happy if I don't experience life either way. And memories of when I tried to go out in the world and be independent, and it ***** up on me and left me in a bad place and I come back to where I am now and things went down hill.

I got a similar thing with Alpha, but it then died down after finishing it. I've gotta let this frustration take me somewhere new, somewhere better.

It's interesting that this subliminal is bringing focus to most of the other areas of my life too. Like alot of the stuff it was created to deal with, the fears, insecurities etc go into nearly every area of my life. I predicted this and am seeing it happening now.

I also didn't do my workout today, because I did it last night as my friend and I were talking about it and he wanted to see what I did with kettlebells. I should of rested a bit longer, but I guess it's good to push it sometimes. So usually my workout makes me feel better and I didn't have that.

I also feel i'm having more resistance with my eating. Only slightly. Wanting some old stuff again. But that can only improve. I've kept it up for a month, longer than ages, I can keep going!

I also felt very antisocial today. Didn't really feel like talking to anyone. I was cooking tea in the kitchen while my dad was cooking his and I was really uncomfortable. Which is weird because I thought I got over that.

-Ben

[benjamin]

I also read in the manual you can use a type b subliminal with this.

I am thinking either absolute self confidence or Ultra Motivation. Because it will help with the confidence/motivation to deal with these things that are coming up and start going somewhere and not just be frustrated like I am.

Do you think it's valuable Shannon? I'm leaning more towards Absolute Self Confidence. But Ultra Motivation will help me be motivated to deal with this other stuff so it doesn't block my weight loss efforts due to feeling down.

Though this all could just by my minds way of creatively creating resistance as if I did another one it would lessen the power of ideal weight.

-Ben

[Spiral]

I know you asked shannon but if I were you I would do Ultra Motivation.

[Shannon]

There's motivation/sucess programming in it already, but you'd be better to focus on that or Ultra Success.

[Patti]

Ben, I think you and I are a lot alike in the respect that our subconscious strictly does not like change as we have strong wills. Many times from the start of listening to these programs I have had the urge to change or add more programs to my listening time. I think it’s all a part of resistance. My subconscious and I now have a relationship where it knows that I’m not going to do that, so it tries to be creative when the subs are dealing with something that makes me consciously feel uncomfortable. For instance, stage 3 of the Life Tune-Up sub is basically making me feel pretty crappy on a daily basis. I always listen at night when I go to bed for about 8 hours. What I noticed today is that I’ve been staying up later, not being so tired, hence not getting what I deem as enough listening time. So consciously I’m starting to listen more in the day.

I feel that even though the confidence or motivation subs may be the ok type to add, whatever the weight sub is working on will be prolonged. I’m more than sure both of those issues are in the program already. If your subconscious is pushing hard for you to add or change programs, try to get more listening time. You’ve waited a long time for this sub, why not let it work to it’s full potential?! Try to relax and just let things be for a while. Just a thought…

[benjamin]

Quote:There's motivation/sucess programming in it already, but you'd be better to focus on that or Ultra Success.

Cool thanks. The other thing i'm wondering is what about visualization? (visualizing my ideal body.) As i've been doing that before I started it for about 3 weeks and am still doing it. But I find it funny that somehow the image I was imagining has changed since I started the subliminal. And the image it's changing too looks too skinny to me so I keep pulling it back to what i've been imagining. So could this mean it's conflicting with the subliminal?

There is one process also where I do EFT and visualization to build the habit of eating healthily. And I will definately keep doing that as I credit it to keeping me eating well for a month. But I think depending what you say about visualizing my ideal body I might change what i'm visualizing from my ideal body to just seeing myself eating healthily. (There is a step where you visualize an image related to the new habit.)

And Patti, it's funny you should write that, because that is what I was thinking in bed last night. I was trying to think "what would I tell somebody if I was the one on the outside" and it was similar to what your saying about what ideal weight is working on will be prolonged. But my ego/resistance kept coming in like "no, it's okay".

Interesting that it's making you stay up later because of that. My bedtime pretty much can't get any later. It's already literally 5am.

Quote:If your subconscious is pushing hard for you to add or change programs, try to get more listening time. You’ve waited a long time for this sub, why not let it work to it’s full potential?! Try to relax and just let things be for a while. Just a thought…

Thanks. Your right. I do seem to forget all this stuff when resistance comes up.

-Ben